You haven't been dating your guy very long. But you're pestered by his occasional bout of aloofness. You think he likes you. In fact, he's probably told you a time or two. For some reason, you're just not "connecting." There are maybe a million reasons for the emotional distance. But it's likely that one of these is the culprit.
He really likes you.
The boys that chased and tortured us in grade school aren't much different as adults. Only in this sense, the great new guy you met last month may like you immensely, but is gauging your interest. If you give him the signal, he'll likely respond in your favor. As the "signal" is unique for every individual, you'll want to carefully walk the line between being coy and getting your point across.
He doesn't like you.
On the other hand, the complete opposite may be true. You may not have done anything in particular to turn him off. Perhaps the luster of the first few dates has worn off. At any rate, he's checked out emotionally and may reduce his calls and texts - effectively fizzling away without confrontation. Just because he's lost interest doesn't mean that he'll forego politeness. The crummy thing about a standoffish guy is that his indifference is so difficult to read.
You don't want to admit that your instincts may be right. The failure to connect could very well be because other women are distracting him. A man who is happily playing the field probably isn't dividing his time and energy equally. If you feel like he's not giving you his full attention, he hasn't bonded with you yet. This kind of detachment is common in casual dating. Be wary if his attitude seems to go hot and cold. All may not be what it seems.
If you've just started seeing a guy who seems to be pulling away, it's possible that he may never utter these words to you. In fact, he might be preoccupied with matters too personal to disclose at this early stage in the relationship. The awkwardness you're sensing really might have nothing to do with you. Space and time will likely satisfy your curiosity if you think he's got something going on.
He's still feeling you out.
It's true that people can gauge their attraction within the first few seconds of meeting someone. But you can't always predict how engaged you'll be in the relationship as time goes on. Your new squeeze may still be asking you out on dates, but taking time to reserve judgment. Never fear. Instant fireworks in a romance don't always lead to happy endings.
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