Hello friends! I looked over my last blog where I shared about "shoulding" people and yourself as a form of unnecessary judgment and I see now that I've taken that concept across other areas of my life. If I say that I "should" do something, it automatically sets in motion a cycle of contempt, guilt, and resentment. I have enjoyed the challenge of releasing myself from that word, "should". I find myself more at peace with the progress of my health, "love life", my career, and most importantly my spiritual development.
It's been a very insightful few weeks thanks to the unconditional love of the universe. I will start with my beloved Golden Door which feels like home. In addition to my personal training at the Golden Door, I'm kicking up my physical activity with six sessions of cardio and four sessions of weight training a week. I am up for the challenge and my body is responding well. I was able to do a modified pull-up and 18 push-ups, Zumba, running on the treadmill, and weigh training. The young lady who runs my gym said, "OH are you going to run again today!?" when I went in this week. She said that she is impressed with me and loves watching me. How sweet is that? I'm blown away by my body's ability to forgive me for the abuse I have put her through. Hello - carrying all this weight is hard on the bod and she's done a great job functioning but now I'm freeing her from the burden. I feel like my spirit and my body are speaking to one another for the first time, hi-fiving and hugging each other daily.
Now that my time with the Golden Door has been extended another 6 months, I feel more confident that this way of living is my forever path that will continue to get healthier and leaner as time goes on. Cindi (the fantastic behavioral therapist at Golden Door) and I had a very deep session this week. We talked about my fears and went back to moments in my life where I felt that fear, I reflected on it, and the learning that happened as a result of each moment. It helped me release the fear by thinking of the moment without the fearful emotion attached to it. She also has me writing down all of my self-sabotaging/fearful thoughts. It's liberating like all get out once I writing them down and reflect on where they came from. Therapy works.
I'm feeling free and light. I feel like running and jumping and hugging everyone in my way. I feel like a child who is on recess, permanently. Life is so good.