Blog Posts by Lisa Steadman

Picture yourself in the Caribbean, enjoying the most breathtaking view of sun, sand, and surf.

A gentle breeze kisses your face, and there you are, not a care in the world. Sounds heavenly doesn't it?

That's EXACTLY the image I'd pictured in my head for weeks leading up to my husband's and my long anticipated vacation to Grand Cayman.

In the 6 years since we first met, travel has been a major player in our relationship. We've had the most extraordinary adventures together, taking off for New Zealand for 3 months while I wrote my second book, spending a month in a quaint rented apartment on Rue St. Antoine in The Marais district of Paris on our honeymoon, discovering the world's most delicious tapas in Spain, and becoming Malbec and beef connoisseurs in Buenos Aires.

I guess you could say that adventure and travel are in our blood.

This summer, however, we decided to slow it down and have our first relaxing vacation together. After doing some research, we decided on Grand

Be honest. Did your New Year's resolutions for 2011 include some variation of "I want to meet my husband this year!"? Then keep reading. It's time to set the scene so you can purposefully and powerfully manifest Mr. Right.

First, let's clarify your REAL resolution. The truth is, I don't think what you REALLY want is to be married. I believe what you ultimately want - what most single women want - is to find YOUR beautiful, blissful, unique happily ever after story. You want to fall madly in love with Mr. Right. And vice versa.

Why wouldn't you want that?

Every person on the planet deserves to find healthy and happy love with their perfect partner. There's just one problem. A lot of single women don't have all the tools they need to get love right. You may not have all the tools you need to get love right.

I know I didn't when I was single. Once upon a time, I repeatedly got love WRONG. I chose the wrong men. I didn't know my own needs, let alone how to communicate my own needs

Did you know the June is perfect month to get out there, become an attraction magnet, and meet men wherever you go?

It's true! And here are just some of the reasons why:

1. Regardless of where you live, the sun is probably shining and men are spending more time outdoors and outside of their routine, making it easy to meet a potential cutie.

2. Without the stress of any major holidays, men are more likely to be available for dating and having fun. (Seriously! Who wants the stress of a first date 2 weeks before New Year's Eve or Valentine's Day?!)

3. Now that summer is here, people tend to be more social, increasing your chances of meeting a cutie in a fun and relaxed environment.

When I was single, I always loved dating during the summer.

In fact, I met my husband five years ago this summer. We were both out at a bar with friends, enjoying a hot summer night. My girlfriend started talking to his friends, and two hours later I was loving the comfortable and

Once upon a time, I thought time had run out on my chance to get love right.

While all my friends were marrying, settling down, and starting families, I was once again staring at the smoldering remains of yet another failed relationship with yet another Mr. Wrong.

The perpetual bachelorette in my social circle, I had a job my friends envied, owned my own condo, took amazing vacations, and always had fabulous plans on the weekends. I was even saving money for retirement like a smart, savvy woman should.

On paper, my life looked amazing.

In reality, I felt like a complete and total failure.

Convinced my single status was a life sentence I was forced to endure without the hope of parole, I worried about growing old alone.

My fears were magnified by my circumstances.

Having gone through my Big Breakup at work, a family friendly environment where engagement parties and baby showers were a weekly occasion, I felt like a dark cloud hung over my cubicle.

A cloud that said: Relationship

When you think back to your childhood, what were some of the earliest messages you got about love, marriage, and relationships? And not just from watching your parents' relationship. Think about your collective childhood influences when it came to romance. From the fairy tales your parents read you at bedtime to the G-rated movies you adored that promised a happy ending, to the songs, t.v. shows, and big screen love stories that told you love conquered all, it probably never occurred to your little girl brain that some of those messages were, well, lies. As an adult, even though the school of life has taught you differently, you may still buy into some of those childhood fantasies. Now's the time to debunk the myths, fables, and fairy tales that just might be sabotaging your chances of having a realistic happily ever after future. Like it or not, you can't call in Mr. Right (or even Mr. Next) without first letting go of Prince Charming. So slip on your big girl slippers and let's

I recently attended a screening of The Backup Plan with Jennifer Lopez. In the film, Jennifer plays Zoe, an ex corporate type who's reinvented her career and, on the verge of turning 40, decides to reinvent her personal life too. With no Mr. Right in sight, Zoe decides she's not waiting any longer to start a family. After getting artificially inseminated, Zoe meets Mr. Right. Go figure.

As I watched the movie, I couldn't help but notice that Zoe made many of the common mistakes my single women clients have made in the past. In fact, she committed 4 of the cardinal dating sins that keep single women minus a Plus One:

Mistake #1: They Allow Work to Consume Them

Even though she left fast paced corporate America to open her own business, Zoe still seems consumed by her work. She's attractive, successful, and yet completely un-dateable because her life is all about work. And even when she meets a nice, interested, available guy, she initially does her best to chase him away. As a

Can we be friends?

After a breakup, this simple question can weigh heavy on your mind. And the short answer is always the same - no. Why? Because as hard as it may be to accept, your relationship is over. This person is now your ex. The relationship ended for a reason. It's now time to EXtract your ex from your life, give yourself time to heal, and find the space to move on. Most people who try to stay friends with their ex are just doing so in hopes of either rekindling the relationship or using the other person as a crutch until someone better comes along. What happens when it's the other person who moves on first? Ouch!

Of course, there are certain circumstances in which you can't avoid maintaining a relationship with your ex, but for now, the following is a cheat sheet on appropriate ways of communicating with your ex after the Big Breakup.

By Phone
The reasons for talking to your ex on the phone are…wait. There are none. Delete his number from your cell phone.

I'm single. Again. I'm 32 and single again.

There, I'd confessed my darkest sins.

Wait.

I'm 32 and single again and I feel like a total failure at love.

That was the tough love truth. And it stung. The year was 2003. And while my best friends were all settled or settling down with their annoyingly adorable husbands, I was nowhere near the road to happily ever after.

Was that even what I wanted anymore? Truthfully, I didn't know. What I did know was that while I was no longer in survival mode from my Big Breakup with Mr. Ex, a journey I later chronicled online and in my first book It's A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life - for good!, I wasn't exactly sure where this new destination was. Mr. Wrong was gone. So was the soul crushing agony of getting over him. Somewhere between our last booty call and deleting his number from my cell phone, I was single again.

Did I feel footloose and fancy free? Sure. But with that newfound