Blog Posts by EMandLO.com

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We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can't answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below.

Hi, I am 25 and been with my husband for 8 years and married for 1 1/2 (we also have a toddler). I have to say first that I enjoy/love pleasing him, I get off by seeing him pleased which I think is how it should be. I'm not a selfish person in bed for sure. But he is.

He wants sex right away, no foreplay what so ever, and when he's done apparently we're both done. I have told him many times you need to be patient and get me ready for you at least! And he does for the next couple times, but then it just stops. He rarely goes down on me and it's so frustrating! I want to be touched everywhere and be caressed from head to toe, which I know is normal! But he doesn't touch me. I dont understand how he doesn't want to fully satisfy

Lelo's Luna Beads for pelvic floor healthIn an effort to promote pelvic-floor health -- an important key to sexual pleasure -- we recently held a contest over on EMandLO.com to find the best t-shirt or bumper sticker slogans about Kegeling. We got a bunch of great, creative and funny responses. Below are the best ten, with MVP Mark Luczak winning a beautiful new set of Lelo Luna Beads, the number one best-selling Kegel accessory in the world three years running. (Or should we say, his new wife is the winner of the Luna Beads!)

Mark Luczak The Old-School Headshot T-Shirt:
Dr. Arnold Henry Kegel...At Your Cervix.

The Acronym:
K eep
E xercising
G enital muscles,
E nhance
L ovemaking!

The Billy Madison:
If Kegeling is cool, then I'm Miles Davis!

The Olympic (also topical!):
2012 Gold Medalist, 200m Freestyle Kegel

The Periodic Table: [Picture the big square with "Kg" in it...]

HONORABLE MENTIONS....

Ryan Butler Squeeze to please!

Gerard Vand Kegels, the new

dorm roomFor many young men and women, this week marks the start of a new chapter of life -- one of higher learning, critical thinking, problem solving, horizon broadening, and lots and lots of casual bonking. It's a whole new world of unchaperoned independence and freedom combined with 18-year-old hormones -- which can result in a lot of really bad life decisions. Follow these rules to save yourself from (at least some) sex-related humiliation and regret up in your ivory tower.

1. Keep your condom shelf fully stocked at all times. Whether you're a man or a woman, make sure you keep a healthy supply of condoms on hand, for you, for your friends, for friends of friends. Invest in decent ones, with lubrication (but not spermicide), because everyone could use a little rehydration after a night of drinking (and let's face it, you will have been drinking - see tip #3). Replace the condoms when they get close to their expiration date -- because the only thing worse than not having a condom is

Advice from three of EMandLO.com's guy friends. This week they answer the following: "Do men really think about baseball to make sex last longer? If they don't know anything about baseball, what else do they think about?" To ask the guys your own question, click here.

tom_miller_100Straight Single Guy (Tom Miller): I guess I've never talked about it with other guys, but I don't know if delaying strategy is really discussed. I think dudes are generally pretty focused on the task at hand. Sometimes we think of a scene from Spaceballs, and that's when you catch us laughing.

anonymous_suitStraight Married Guy (Figleaf): I never really understood baseball statistics (the canonical thing the old advice manuals recommended men think about) but -- true story! -- when I was younger, I did sometimes make sex last longer by trying to figure out why anyone would want to think about baseball when they were having sex! For the record, one of the things that made sex last longer, for me and I think for a lot of men, is to

Stuck on you















We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can't answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below.

Dear Em & Lo,

I met a great man through an online dating service. We haven't met, but he wants me to be his girlfriend. He is in Europe and is returning for a business trip in October. Is it possible for a man to fall in love or be infatuated with a woman through video chats? Does that even happen anymore?

- Virtual Girlfriend

What should V.G. do? Let her know in the comments below…

RELATED ARTICLES ON EMandLO.com:

• How to Survive a Blind Date in 6 Easy Steps
• Why Do Men Get in Touch with Old Flames?
• What Are the Rules for Online Dating?

Todd Akin

A big thank you to Missouri Republican Senate candidate and House Committee Member on "Science, Space and Technology," Todd Akin (pictured above), for finally saying what no one else has had courage to say publicly: that there's legitimate rape (you know the type: big, scary, minority stranger breaks into your house in the middle of the night, threatens you with a weapon, beats you to a pulp, sexually assaults you and leaves you for dead) and then there's just a bad date night. For too long, the liberal, feminist, pagan, vegetarian, drug-addicted, sexually promiscuous, and amoral elite have conflated the two. Well, not any more! For further clarification, read the following list which outlines the five main types of non-rape "rape":

1. If you dressed provocatively. Why do you dress like that if you don't want to get raped? You're basically just asking for it, tempting men with your sinful curves and your devilish décolletage. How can you expect men to control themselves

TurtlesAdvice from three of EMandLO.com's guy friends. This week they answer the following: "Do guys ever discuss circumcision with each other? Do you tend to know whether your guy friends are circumcised or not?" To ask the guys your own question, click here.

Gay Single Guy (Justin Huang): Gross. I don't know whether any of my straight guy friends are cut or not (repeat, gross), but I'm sure they'd be a bit freaked out to know that I probably know their penis size and if they're any good at using it if they've hooked up with any one of my girl friends. It's not like I want to know -- in fact it's the exact opposite! My straight boys are like my less evolved younger brothers (whom I don't share a bathroom with!). But margarita night with my girl friends does tend to stray into penis talk, and penis size is always something fun to giggle about over a mixed drink.

When it comes to my fellow gay friends, I'm sure there's a common misconception that all we do is talk nonstop about dick, but if

An old map.

Dear Em & Lo,

I truly enjoy sex with my boyfriend, but I don't orgasm through sex. We are a relatively new couple, and he hasn't learned how to get me off reliably with oral sex. He recently told me that when he performs oral sex on me, I am too quiet.

I completely understand his desire for me to be more vocal and more directive. However, I hesitate, because the very few times I have given directions, he applied the advice in the moment but then never again. And I don't want to offend him by being patronizing or assuming he doesn't understand the female anatomy.

I want to turn him on, and I want to orgasm when he goes down on me. I love him, and enjoy his efforts, but he doesn't seem to hit the right spot. How can I communicate what he should do without being condescending or patronizing? It's not like he's bad at this -- his efforts have been valiant the few times he has tried, he just hasn't learned my body completely yet.

-- The Quiet American

Dear Q.A.,