A We chatted with Tracey Cox, author of the new book Dare: What Happens When Fantasies Come True, about how to make your own sexual fantasy come true.
EM & LO: When you were researching women's fantasies for this book, what was the most common fantasy that you kept seeing?
TRACEY COX: Sleeping with another woman was by far the most common. And it's one of the fantasies that had a higher success rate when women take it through to reality. People assume women sleep with other women because it's something men want them to do, but it's something a lot of women are open to anyway.
What is the most common fantasy that women would actually want to come true?
TC: Experimenting with another woman, followed closely by sleeping with a stranger. That was another strong theme. It's a myth that it's only men who want variety and new flesh. Women do, too. What stops us is we're more inclined to think things through - and if the relationship is good, lots of women decide the risk of following
Blog Posts by EMandLO.com
A We chatted with Tracey Cox, author of the new book Dare: What Happens When Fantasies Come True, about how to make your own sexual fantasy come true.Read More »from How to Make Your Fantasy Come True
ArchetypesThe new community site ArchetypeMe tailors content and products to individual personalities. As part of their new ArcheGuide on Bedroom Tips, we put together this summary of how your personality type relates to how you are in the bedroom...Read More »from The 10 Archetypes of Sex
1. Creative: They're not necessarily up for anything, but they will try new and unique ways to spice things up. Think: dramatic mood lighting, hand-sewn lingerie, homemade massage lotion, fun with chocolate sauce, and DIY sex toys. Read about seduction tips for the Creative here.
2. Rebel: These types are up for anything. You name it, they've probably tried it. Don't expect old-fashioned stereotypical gender roles to be played out in the bedroom. And know that they will discuss your co-minglings openly with their friends at brunch and on their blog. Read about seduction tips for the Rebel here.
3. Advocate: They'll join a self-love-a-thon for a cause, get naked in protest, and refuse to sleep with anyone who doesn't support reproductive rights
- EMandLO.com | Love + Sex – Tue, Jul 30, 2013 8:02 PM EDT
Brooks & Desiree on The BacheloretteOuch. We find Des to be a bit of a matzah bachelorette (flat and bland), but even we felt really, really bad for her last night. Getting dumped is hard, but it's at least twenty-five times harder when it's televised nationally. Brooks might as well just pushed her off that cliff. And what are the odds: you've got 25 potential suitors and you fall for the one that just isn't into you? Did Des used to kick puppies when she was little, because the universe does not want her to find romantic happiness. Well, maybe we can learn from her misfortune and Brook's missteps, so it's not all for naught:
- When dumping someone, be as clear as possible as quickly as possible. Sure, it may be difficult for you to spit it out, but making the dumpee wait and wait and wait for the knife is psychological torture (especially when they know it's coming, but they're still hoping this could just be your weird way of confessing your undying love).
- When you want to breakup with someone, do it outside in
Tracey CoxThe fabulous and funny Tracey Cox from the U.K. is one of our favorite sex writers out there. We're thrilled to present the following excerpt from her new book, Dare: What Happens When Fantasies Come True:Read More »from How Fantasizing Can Improve Your Sex Life
Think of your fantasies as a vibrator for the mind. There are a finite number of possible physical combinations of what we can do with our bodies, but our minds are limitless.
Your imagination is the single, most potent engine driving sexual desire. Tap into your imagination and you've turned on nature's built-in aphrodisiac. Fantasies are what keep sex fizzy when your sex life - or your partner - goes temporarily pear-shaped. They're what can make sex with someone we've slept with hundreds of times seem not only remotely appealing but exciting. One of the quickest ways to arouse yourself is to fantasize. Even better, fantasies are a form of foreplay we can access in an instant - anywhere, any time - because we carry them with us always.
Some fantasies are fleeting. Others start
I see you!Read More »from Top 5 Tips for Taking Saucy Pics Together
Shooting intimate photos together can be embarrassing and even terrifying, but it can also be an incredibly sexy and intimate experience. Plus, no matter how you feel about your shape, we're pretty sure that in thirty years you'll wish you had that body - and you'll be glad you captured it for posterity!
1. Only shoot saucy pics with someone you trust completely - if you wouldn't invite them home for the holidays, can you really trust them with compromising evidence? You can double-down on privacy by keeping your face out of the shot and/or shooting with mini instant camera (no negatives and no instant ability to "forward"). If you must send your partner a saucy pic of yourself, be sure to use an app like SnapChat that only displays the pic for a few seconds before self-combusting.
2. Full nudity is overrated - sometimes the sexier images happen when you leave a little to the imagination… leave on an item of clothing, or artfully drape a sheet, or coyly place an arm or hand in the
- EMandLO.com | Love + Sex – Tue, Jul 23, 2013 1:20 PM EDT
The men tell all.It's hard to come up with five decent love lessons each week when the show isn't that exciting this season. The bloopers reel wasn't even that good! (And such small portions, too!) A sure a signifier of just how ho-hum this cast was. So don't expect much enlightenment from "The Men Tell All." Fingers crossed for finale drama. Until then, a few tips (extracted from tonight's episode with metal pliers):Read More »from Top 5 Love Lessons from the Bachelorette (The Men Tell All)
- EMandLO.com | Love + Sex – Tue, Jul 16, 2013 3:46 PM EDT
The BacheloretteRead More »from Top 5 Love Lessons Learned from the Bachelorette (Season 9, Episode 8)
1. Dating don'ts: Showing up shirtless. Showing up in an animal mascot suit. Showing up in earnest.
2. Don't ever, EVER, let your Dad touch your date more than you've touched your date.
3. Similarly: If you ever want to have sex again, do NOT, under any circumstances, get a nasal adjustment on national television.
4. No need to throw away a perfectly good ring for sentimental reasons: eBay exists for a reason.
5. It's officially inevitable: women always fall for the wrong men and let the right ones go.
- EMandLO.com | Love + Sex – Fri, Jul 12, 2013 2:20 PM EDT
lolit_croppedRead More »from Top 5 Works of Dirty Literature You Can Read in Public
This article originally appeared on ArchetypeMe.com
We'd never be caught dead reading Fifty Shades of Grey -- let alone well-written erotica -- in public. There's just something unseemly about it, like PDA with too much tongue. But there are plenty of books that can satisfy your craving for smut while making you appear erudite to your neighbors on the beach or the subway.
tropic-cancer-henry-miller-paperback-cover-art Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller The original edition of the book, published in France in 1934, was banned here in the U.S. for its sexual explicitness. Not until 1961 did we get a U.S. version -- and that led to obscenity trials going all the way to the Supreme Court, which declared it non-obscene in 1964, a whopping thirty years after its publication. Be warned: it will probably offend your modern sensibilities with its misogyny. (And if it doesn't, then there's probably something wrong with you.)
LadyChatterleysLover_200Lady Chatterly's Lover by D.H. Lawrence For a more female-positive sex book from the same era, check out this 1928
- EMandLO.com | Love + Sex – Wed, Jul 10, 2013 3:12 PM EDT
ABC's Bachelorette will give one final rose to the guy she believes to be the man of her dreams!
- If someone asks you (Catherine) about the love of your life (Sean) and you respond "We're best friends"...? Hello, red flag?!
- When you (Michael) are trying to make someone (Des) fall in love with you, don't talk about all the negatives in your life: exes, health problems, daddy issues, freakin' tombstones, etc.
- If someone (Des) can't look you (Michael) in the eye while you tell them your deepest feelings, um, it's a no-go.
- Never admit on camera to falling in love (Des), because you are sure to jinx it and be rejected on national television. It's inevitable.
- When your adult child (Michael) calls you to tell you they've been dumped, do NOT say, "Here we go again"! That's child abuse.