The other day, I wrote a post about the 7 things I love about being single. And they're all true. But in the spirit of fairness-and so you all don't think I'm this Pollyanna type person who loves going home and rocking out in my empty apartment, here are the things that really, seriously annoy me:
Waking up on top of my computer, mid-YouTube search for old SNL clips starring Tina Fey. Self-explanatory. When you live by yourself, you can sometimes get seriously-SERIOUSLY-distracted.
Having to deal with apartment issues on my own. This includes the mouse I think is living in my closet. I heard scratching the other night, and since it was 3am and I was exhausted and I watched way too many movies with talking animals as a child, I actually found myself talking to the closet door, trying to reason with it. Please, please please go away, and I'll pretend you were never here. Please? I feel like living with someone would probably inspire me to action.
Going solo to family gatherings. I like
Blog Posts by Redbook
- Redbook | Love + Sex – Mon, Apr 13, 2009 5:02 PM EDT
The other day, I wrote a post about the 7 things I love about being single. And they're all true. But in the spirit of fairness-and so you all don't think I'm this Pollyanna type person who loves going home and rocking out in my empty apartment, here are the things that really, seriously annoy me:Read More »from . . . And 7 Things I Really Hate About the Single Life
This morning, I woke up sprawled on top of my computer, which was snuggled next to me in bed. This isn't unusual-while I try to get my writing done at my desk, I sometimes do my best writing lying down (I'm sure a psychoanalyst would have a field day with that one!)-and late into the night.Read More »from 7 Things I Love About Being Single
I know, falling asleep cuddled next to a computer sounds sort of depressing, but quite honestly, at this point in my life, while I'd rather wake up to a man I love than the comp, I'm okay with it. Here are the seven reasons why I'm loving living solo:
1. Creativity at mealtime-I'm trying a new thing where I only eat food that's at home (as opposed to takeout) and since I skipped the grocery store last week, pickings are slim in my apartment. Which is why the other night, I had a PB&J&honey&banana slices & granola on top for dinner-so gross but so good!
2. No volume control-No, not that way! I mean, I can have late night phone conversations or watch TV until whenever, if I want. When I lived with
I admit it: I'm a sucker for The Hills. So much so, that I found myself crying when Lauren and Heidi hugged in a boozy, drunken lovefest at the end of the first episode of Season Five.Read More »from Do you have a "Heidi" in your life?
One of the things I love about the show is that they don't trivialize how complicated it is to love your friends-I feel like that's something that's not really highlighted that much in society. I know a lot of times when I was the age Heidi and Lauren were I wondered if I was normal for feeling so much love and jealousy and anger and passion toward a friend.
My best friend in college was almost like a romantic relationship, although I didn't realize it until after we stopped being friends. We lived together, took the same classes, would write endless e-mails back and forth and told each other we loved each other at the end of a phone conversation.
The beginning of the end was when we went to London for study abroad together. She got a boyfriend, and I didn't. And I was jealous and angry and we once
Today, in my inbox, I came across a press release from a floral company, stating that Real Men Love Flowers and why not buy a bouquet for the man in your life?Read More »from Would You Ever Get Your Guy Flowers?
Huh. I've never given a guy flowers, and I don't know any of my friends that have, either. But thinking about it, why not?
I have to admit, though, I'm not really a flower girl. A couple years ago, I was meeting a guy I met at a friend's party for a Sunday afternoon date. We'd opted to meet by the arch in Washington Square Park, and I remember walking over to the arch, a sinking feeling in my stomach as I saw the guy, standing and holding a long-stemmed rose.
I appreciated the gesture, I really did, but then I had to walk around with the rose all afternoon. It was awkward, I couldn't stick it in my bag, and I felt sort of silly carrying it around town, with people assuming there was chemistry between us, when really, there wasn't at all.
And then, another time, I was meeting a new-ish guy at my absolute favorite
I'm not afraid to admit that Taylor Swift's Love Story makes me cry. This weekend, I was listening to it on repeat, over, and over, and over again. It brings me right back to that heart-stopping, knee-wobbly feeling of romance-something I've been missing a lot in my own life.Read More »from The 7 Most Romantic (Slightly Cheesy) Songs Ever
I'm a sucker for romance, and I love a good, lyrical pop ballad. I feel like a romantic song should be slightly cheesy, slightly embarrassing if anyone sees it on your iPod, shouldn't necessarily be something you'd want to listen to while you get it on but should be something that always-no matter where you are or what you're doing-makes you remember the way romance should be.
Here are my favorite romantic songs-what are yours? (Note I didn't put any Celine Dion or Whitney Houston in this list-for some reason, those ladies just don't do it for me!)
She's in Love with the Boy-Trisha Yearwood's sweet ode to adolescent romance is simple, lovely, and has just the right amount of conflict to make it a country song.
- Redbook | Love + Sex – Fri, Apr 3, 2009 9:21 PM EDT
Read More »from Go Back to the Basicsâ€”7 Reminders for How to Date
Every summer, I volunteer for a week as a camp counselor for kids with cancer and their siblings. It's by far my favorite week of the year, and it's not depressing-it's fun. For that one week, the kids aren't sick, they're kids, and I love being in charge of a group of high-energy, high-drama twelve and thirteen year olds.
Anyway, as I'm planning this year and looking through old pics from previous summers on this rainy and cold April day, I'm remembering one of our cabin convos that devolved into a discussion about dating. And I realized, even though my own dating life sometimes seems like a trainwreck, deep down, I have some good advice. I just have to remember it.
Here's what I told my 12-year-old campers as they took their first wobbly steps toward romance-and I realized, all of these rules still hold true for me, as a twentysomething looking for love. Do you have any other back-to-basics rules? If so, I'd love to hear them.
Friends are more important than boys. Bottom line, end
- Redbook | Love + Sex – Thu, Apr 2, 2009 11:42 PM EDT
Read More »from Have You Ever Told a Lie to Get Out of a Dating Situation?
A year or so ago, I told a guy I'd been casually dating that I was moving to California. I wasn't, but I wanted to get out of the situation we were in (a protracted friends with benefits thing) and I knew that I wouldn't be able to quit him cold turkey unless there were actual (imaginary) miles separating us.
He and I didn't have mutual friends, so it was actually a pretty easy lie to carry out. But I still do sometimes think about him and was actually almost considering calling him the other night, when I was feeling bored and lonely and caught in playing a protracted game of what-if with myself.
But I didn't contact him. And I was surprised when I received a text from him last night. He said he'd be in Santa Monica for the next six weeks and asked if I'd meet him.
I paused. And then I texted him back. Hi. I've been thinking about you. Still (and the reason why I have not been in contact with you even though I do think of you) I do not think it would be a good idea to meet up.
I admit it: I like when guys open the door for me, actively ensure that the elevator door won't slam closed as I'm balancing on five-inch heels, and-yeah-offer to pay the tab on a date.Read More »from Your Favorite Moments of Chivalry
I'm not prissy or a girly girl, and I don't like being helped out of my coat (I always feel like I get tangled up!) being asked to order first at a restaurant (I'm indecisive) or walked home (because we all know where that leads to).
Anyway, in a city like New York, I've found the most important moment of chivalry, trumping all else, is the graceful give way to a subway seat. Subway seats, in rush hour, are a hot commodity, and it's the worst thing ever when you're trying to get home, wearing heels, juggling your purse and gym bag and some guy wearing LOAFERS snags a seat before you!
I'm such a stickler for subway etiquette that one time, I was thisclose to grabbing a seat on a subway when a man from seemingly out of nowhere snagged it at the last second. I glared at him the whole ride up to my stop,
- Redbook | Love + Sex – Tue, Mar 31, 2009 9:51 PM EDT
Read More »from What Do You Reveal (Or Keep Secret) On a First Date?
Recently, I went on a date with a guy who really reminded me of Dr. Owen Hunt on Grey's Anatomy. Similar look, similar jumpiness, similar story (just back from Iraq, although he's not a surgeon).
The date went well, but there were no real sparks and that, plus the fact that he lived pretty far away, meant that we happily went our separate ways. But we did become Facebook friends and occasionally comment on each other's wall (ah, modern technology!)
So that's why I was surprised when I saw his latest Status update: becoming a dad today!
Later status updates confirmed that his (wife? girlfriend? ex? hookup buddy?) was in the hospital and a baby was due eminently, not that he was engaging in the act of conception with someone.
Hmm. I admit, at first I felt a little tug of betrayal about that. Why didn't he tell me on our date? That's a big deal! And then I wonder, if we had clicked, at what point would he have dropped that piece of information? Of course, the probable reason he didn't
- Redbook | Love + Sex – Mon, Mar 30, 2009 11:12 PM EDT
Read More »from Five Games I Love Playing with Guys (and One I Hate)
I'm competitive, especially when it comes to boys versus girls. When I was little, I would sprint my heart out, trying to beat the boys in swim practice. In college, I loved when we ended waterpolo practice with a co-ed scrimmage, where I'd have no qualms about playing dirty (not like that!) while kicking a guy accidentally-on-purpose underneath the surface.
Now, I've stopped being so aggressive, but I still find a little hot and sweaty G-rated afternoon action is virtually guaranteed to end in a tangled-sheeted tryst. I remember one time, I'd just begun dating a sweet and mild-mannered lawyer who invited me to go kayaking. After splashing in the water, we were more than ready to get hot and heavy when we got back to his apartment.
But, now I'm single, and the only thing that sets my heart racing are triathlon training runs (and, wow, if you're looking for sweaty men, look no further than your local parks, ladies!) But, that got me thinking about all the games I've played with