Blog Posts by Gretchen Rubin

You come home to a towering stack of mail. What next? Everyone's routine will be slightly different, but here's the system that, after much trial and error, I devised for myself.

1. The first and KEY step to handling mail: I stand next to a wastebasket and toss junk-mail the minute I identify it.

2. I put magazines in the magazine drawer. Most people display magazines on coffee tables or in special magazine racks. I've never understood this. Magazines always look messy. I keep them out of sight.

3. I open bills and throw away everything but the parts I need. I've been considering automating my bills, but some friends have had bad experiences, so I'm holding off for now.

4. I put those bills in my correspondence drawer, where I keep stamps, envelopes, an address stamp, and my checkbook. Once a week or so, I watch a Friends re-run and pay them.

5. I put invitations in a special pile to take to my office, along with anything else that needs to be noted on my

If you're like me, you sometimes have trouble remembering people's names, or even how you know them. A few years ago, while at a chaotic birthday party for a three-year-old, I was on the brink of going over to some little kid's father to say, "I think we went to college together." Turns out it was Dylan McDermott!

So I've developed some strategies for coping with the fact that I'm not able to pull up a person's name right away. Of course, you can always just say politely, "I'm sorry, I don't recall your name," but if you'd rather try to disguise your forgetfulness a bit, give these a try:

1. The "I know your name, but I'm blocked" dodge:
"I keep wanting to call you 'David,' but I know that's not right."

2. The "Of course I know you -- in fact, I want all your information" dodge:
"Hey, I'd love to get your card."

3. The "The tip of my tongue" dodge:
"I know I know your name, but I'm blanking right now."

4. The "You're brilliant!" dodge:
"Wow,

Exercise helps make you happy. People who exercise are healthier, more energetic, think more clearly, sleep better, and have delayed onset of dementia. They also get relief from anxiety and mild depression, comparable to medication and therapy.

But even when you acknowledge the tremendous benefits, if you're not already exercising regularly, it can be hard to adopt the habit. I managed to change myself from a natural sloth to an enthusiastic exerciser by using all these tricks:

Always exercise on Monday. This sets the psychological pattern for the week.

Never skip exercising for two days in a row. You can skip a day, but the next day, you must exercise no matter how inconvenient.

DON'T link exercise to weight loss as a way to motivate yourself. Although it's quite true that people who exercise regularly are far more likely to keep weight off, you'll find yourself justifying missing your run by turning down two Saltines. And if you don't lose weight easily (who does?), you're likely to

I confess: I can't touch each piece of paper just one time. I can't return every email within 24 hours. I can't maintain a clear desk at all times. I can't go paperless. Nevertheless, I've found some realistic strategies for getting things done that have helped me a lot.

One thing I know about myself is that an accumulation of tiny tasks, even if they aren't particularly irksome in themselves, combine to make me feel overwhelmed and drained. If I can keep little chores from piling up, I feel much more capable of tackling bigger, more difficult tasks. Here are my strategies:

1. Follow the "one-minute rule." I don't postpone any task that can be done in less than one minute. I put away my umbrella; I glance at a letter and toss it; I put the newspapers in the recycling bin; I close the cabinet door. Because the tasks are so quick, it isn't too hard to make myself follow the rule, but it has big results.

2. Observe the "evening tidy-up." I take ten minutes before bed to do

Everyone from Aristotle to Martin Seligman agrees that friendship is one of the keys to happiness.

No one would argue that they DON'T want strong friendships, but the trick is figuring out how, exactly, to keep your friendships strong.

Here twelve tips for how to act like a true friend:

1. Be supportive when your friend has bad news. This is perhaps the most critical duty of a friend.

2. Be supportive when your friend has good news. This is trickier; surprisingly, it's sometimes harder to be supportive when someone gets a promotion, gets engaged, or enjoys other good fortune, than it is to be supportive when someone is going through a hard time.

3. Don't gossip. It's not nice. Also, although it may be fun to gossip about Pat with Jean, Jean is probably going to feel wary of being your friend-you're not trustworthy. Along the same lines…

4. Keep a secret. One of the most satisfying aspects of friendship is that it allows two people to confide in each other.

I'm a big believer in family traditions. I'm also a big believer in the idea that children get a big kick out of even relatively small gestures, so that it's worth taking the time to jazz things up a bit, in easy ways.

A friend of mine has a great tradition when she and her husband travel away from their children.

Like many people, she brings her kids little presents from trips, but instead of just handing them over upon her return, she makes sure to pick the presents early in the trip, then allows her children to ask for clues. Each child gets one clue per day, and they have tremendous fun coming up with the questions, coordinating with each other about who will ask what, keeping a list of the clues that have been revealed, debating amongst themselves, etc.

She says that the gift itself brings them much less fun than the guessing game.

Research shows that a key to happiness is squeezing out as much happiness as possible from a happy event, and as much as possible, we

A while back, I read a study that having more than one computer monitor gives you a big efficiency boost, but I put off getting a second monitor for a long time.

I had a lot of reasons why I didn't want to try it: I didn't want to spend the money; I didn't want to have to figure out which monitor to buy; my desk was too crowded; I already felt overstimulated at work; etc.

But finally I decided to give it a try and made the jump to two monitors. About an hour after having two monitors, I decided I had to have a third one.

I love having three monitors. It makes me so happy. Instead of feeling more overwhelmed, I feel less overwhelmed, because I don't have to switch between tasks. I can work much more quickly. I get a lot more done in a shorter amount of time.

I did have to fiddle around with my set-up. After my first day with my three monitors, I realized my face muscles hurt from squinting. It took me a while to figure out the problem: the monitors were all turned to

Of course, being happy at work depends mostly on how much you like your job. But there are also smaller steps that can boost your happiness, as well -- partly by boosting your physical comfort and your productivity.

Some of these steps are VERY small, but the fact that you're taking steps to improve your situation itself boosts happiness.

1. Check for eyestrain by putting your hand to your forehead in a salute. If your eyes feel relieved, your work space is too bright.

2. Sit up straight with your shoulders down - every time I adjust my sitting position, I instantly feel more energetic and cheerier.

3. Get a phone headset. I resisted for a long time, because it looks so preposterous, but it's really much more comfortable. Also, it lets me pace while I talk on the phone, which also looks preposterous, but is energizing.

4. Don't keep candy on your desk. Studies show that people are much more likely to snack when a treat is within easy reach, and a handful of M&Ms