We all want to get along well with other people, and one way to do this is to help people feel good about themselves. If you make a person feel smart and insightful, that person will enjoy your company. The point is not to be manipulative, but to help other people feel good about their contributions to a conversation.
Here are some suggestions…
1. Take notes. I'm a compulsive note-taker, and I used to feel self-conscious about pulling out my little notebook and taking notes during a casual conversation. Then I noticed that people really seemed to enjoy it; the fact that I was taking notes made their remarks seem particularly insightful or valuable. Now I don't hold myself back.
2. Refer to a comment that the person made earlier in the conversation. "This ties to your earlier point about…" This reference shows a person that you're tracking and remembering their comments very closely. And give people credit for their ideas! The terrific Ramit Sethi gave me the idea forRead More »from 7 Tips for Making Other People Feel Smart and Insightful