Blog Posts by Joanna Douglas, Senior Fashion and Beauty Editor

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Why do you continue to beat the crap out of people, curse them out, spit on them, beat them with cell phones and/or landlines until they require stitches?

Is it because you're sick of wearing 5" Christian Louboutin heels all day? Are you pissed about your first class red-eye to Saint Tropez? Bummed out about a flood in your Jamaican waterside bungalow? Afraid of being upstaged by Gisele while strutting the catwalk in Milan? Is it annoying being romantically linked to Leo DiCaprio, Johnny Depp, Lenny Kravitz, Quincy Jones, Sean Penn, Sylvester Stallone, Eric Clapton, Robert DeNiro, Adam Clayton, Eddie Murphy, Gabriel Byrne, Damon Dash, Diddy, Tommy Lee, Robbie Williams, Usher, Terrence Howard, and umm Muhammad Ali? (By the way, we heard Mike Tyson dumped you cause he felt threatened. Okay, just kidding. Well, MAYBE!)

With your recent arrest for assaulting a cop at Heathrow Airport, you've gotten yourself banned from British Airways. Not such a big deal. And incidentally, it looks

Okay, we know that Bluetooth is awesome, because you can beam your information to people within a short range, yadda yadda. You know what is really freaking annoying? When some guy in a suit has his earpiece on and is gesticulating wildly with both arms walking down the street and talking so loudly about hedge funds you can't even hear your own iPod when it's already at gonna-make-you-deaf volumes. Or when you're in the supermarket and the woman next to you says something and you think she's talking to you so you answer, but realize she's talking to one of her three kids. Except she's not doing that either-she's using Bluetooth.

Do you know how many times I think someone is talking to me or talking to THEMSELVES like a crazy person when they're actually on a phone call? Hey, here's an idea, it's called a cell phone. You listen to one end and talk into another. When you're done to can fold it up and put it away. Yes, you regrettably need to hold it in one hand, but maybe you can risk a

While doing press for the new "Sex and the City" movie (in theaters May 30), Sarah Jessica Parker opened up about her own love life with hubby Matthew Broderick. Is it just us or does it sound like she's going through a rough patch?

"I'm really lucky that he is the father of my son, but that doesn't mean that we always agree on everything. We've had some rather treacherous train rides. I'm happy to be with him regardless but I'm sure there are many times he wishes he wasn't with me.

It's a real privilege to be a part of (our marriage). Sometimes I'm better at it, sometimes I'm really bad at it. There are things about it I like and I want it to work."

Look out Katie Holmes! Back in the 80s when Tom was 23 and had just completed "Risky Business," Cher was his 39-year-old cougar. "It could have been a great big romance because I was crazy for him," Cher told Oprah in a recent interview. "He was shy. He said he felt like such a boob in school and nobody talked to him. We went on a date once for dinner in a New York restaurant and the waitress was from his old school. He told me she never talked to him back in school, but now he was recognized he got all her attention." Cher dated Tom for several months until he met Mimi Rogers, the woman responsible for introducing him to Scientology. Seriously, who can compete with a force as strong as Xenu? Sorry Cher. Do you believe in life after love? [SMH]

After last night's episode I have given up on "The Hills." This season has been painful to watch and watching LC go out with her annoying ex and move into a new mansion with her girls made me want to gag. Make it stop! Dear Lord, please make it stop.

"The Hills"-let me list the reasons you have done me wrong:

• The whole thing is staged, and it's so obviously staged at this point. How many times can these people run into each other BY ACCIDENT at the same club or restaurant.

• There are no new characters. How many times can you bring "Laguna Beach" alums like Brody Stephen, Lo and Jason back on the show. Don't they make any new friends?

• The settling is old. We've moved on to bigger and better things-like rich NYC brats on "Gossip Girl."

• The relationships are dull. They can be friends or they can fight - only so much can happen between people! In the real world Heidi and Lauren would have gone their separate ways years ago and that'd be a wrap.

• Lauren is whiny. As the

Over the past several months I've noticed a trend I'm not cool with. The issue: my friend counts on MySpace and Facebook are dropping at a rapid pace. The reason: my friends are addicted and quitting cold turkey.

How can you be "addicted" to a website? Easily, says my Los Angeles friend who is so embarrassed by the addiction he wishes to remain nameless. As a constant quitter/re-joiner, his MySpace habit became a serious issue. "It was a problem, it was seriously interfering with my work and screwing up my productivity. I'm still OCD about it, but for a while I was obsessively checking every hour on the hour. Reading bulletins, reading comments, checking pictures, spending hours looking at and adjusting my own page. I got really self-conscious about checking it after midnight too because then people on the East Coast would wake up the next day and be like, 'God, he was already on today? What a loser.' "

I didn't really buy into the addiction until I received a shocking email today

Lisa Maree Williams/Getty ImagesThese days you can't throw a stick without hitting Kim Kardashian. And no, it's not because of her big J.Lo-butt that she and everyone else seems so intent on emphasizing. But what is it exactly she is famous for? We honestly couldn't remember! A trip over to Wikepedia informed us:

Kimberly Noel Kardashian (born October 21, 1980) is an American stylist, apparel retailer[1] and television personality. She is best known for her social life, sex tape, and her appearances on reality show Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

Oh right, that's what we thought. But really, why is she famous? Our insight after the jump!

Well her real dad was Robert Kardashian, OJ Simpson's lawyer during his murder trial, and her mom remarried Olympic gold medalist Bruce Jenner. She made a sextape with then-boyfriend, rapper Ray J (Brandy's brother), and while she initially sued the distribution company, she later settled for $5 million. Her outrageous and extremely large family (she has 2 sisters, 3

Steven A Henry/Getty ImagesApparently American Idol runner-up Clay Aiken still has crazed fans. Well, at least one. One woman has allegedly seen his performance in Broadway's Spamalot at least 40 times and she waits by the stage door hoping to catch a glimpse. "She is at the stage door from 9:30 in the morning, waiting all day to talk to people as they come in," says an insider. "She says talking to the other actors, she feels a step closer to Clay." But why exactly is this woman so obsessed? The source says she thinks, "He is the Savior." Alllllrighty then.

Do you think Clay is obsession-worthy? [NY Daily]