Exactly how dedicated are you to the concepts of recycling, scrimping and using all-natural products in your food?
If you're willing to put your money-shot where you mouth is, you'd send away for a copy of the cookbook "Natural Harvest," which goes into stomach-churning detail about how to store, prepare and serve semen as food.
Yes, it has really, erm, come to this.
"Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties," the book's description goes. "Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that."
And, yes, it appears to be a real book, and a second edition is already on the way.
Right off the bat, you get a recipe for a cocktail (a White Russian, naturally):
2 oz. vodka
1 oz. coffee