By Beth Levine
You can train yourself to stop saying yes when you want to say no-and do it respectfully and thoughtfully, says William Ury, PhD, cofounder of Harvard University's Program on Negotiation.
Step 1: Figure out what you really want. Learn How to Say No
If you're unclear about how you feel or if someone catches you off guard, give yourself time to think it over before answering. Tell the other person you'll get back to her at a certain time, then put yourself in a quiet space and ask yourself if the request feels right.
Step 2: Find the yes.
Most of the time, when you want to say no, it's because you need to say yes to something else, such as guarding your money, sanity or time. Look at a given situation and decide where your yes lies. Example: Your brother asks you to cosign a loan. You feel guilty not helping him out. But you aren't saying no to him-you're saying yes to protecting your children's college funds.Find the right refusal strategy based on the asker's Read More »from Learn How to Say No