Last year, I spent my Valentine's Day interviewing and getting groped by Ron Jeremy. Suffice it to say, I've never really had a romantic, stuff-made-of-movies-starring-Colin-Firth V-Day. In years previous, the holiday has mostly been a disappointing one, filled with lame/MIA cards, missed dinner reservations, uncomfortable lingerie, and gifts that "must, uh, be held up at the post office or something."
Looks like I'm not the only one that can count on a letdown on February 14th--or rather February 14th, give or take a few days--Yahoo! did some digging and found that men don't even know when Valentine's Day is. They've been typing "when is valentine's day" into the search engine by the masses. The ladies aren't off the hook either--over a quarter of those searches are coming from women (did we forget or are we just repressing memories of Valentine's Days past?)
And if he does remember the day? Expect a gift from the dollar store! Turns out, romance is not exactly recession friendly,
Blog Posts by Marie Claire
- Marie Claire | Love + Sex – Thu, Feb 5, 2009 1:02 AM EST
Last year, I spent my Valentine's Day interviewing and getting groped by Ron Jeremy. Suffice it to say, I've never really had a romantic, stuff-made-of-movies-starring-Colin-Firth V-Day. In years previous, the holiday has mostly been a disappointing one, filled with lame/MIA cards, missed dinner reservations, uncomfortable lingerie, and gifts that "must, uh, be held up at the post office or something."Read More »from This Year, Valentine's Day is Cheap and Forgettable
They got you: A heart-shaped box of candy from the supermarketDiana Vilibert
They're saying: "I forgot Valentine's Day."
They got you: A surprise weekend getaway to a bed & breakfast
They're saying: "I'm hoping you like me enough to deal with being in the same room as my snoring and farting--I know I like you enough to put up with yours."
They got you: Anything he made with his own two hands
They're saying: "I'm crazy about you--and I've got the Krazy Glue-splattered furniture and staples in my hands to prove it."
They got you: Jewelry or a watch
They're saying: "I'm not super creative, but hey, I tried. Don't worry, I probably won't notice if you exchange it for something that's more your style."
They got you: A voicemail on February 15th, apologizing for forgetting about Valentine's Day
They're saying: "Please give me a call back when you're done bad-mouthing me to all your friends so that I can grovel."
Read More »from Valentine's Day Gifts Decoded
- Marie Claire | Love + Sex – Mon, Feb 2, 2009 9:28 PM EST
Did Cupid pass you by this year?Read More »from 10 Great Things About Being Single on Valentine's Day
1. It's a great excuse to get sloshed with your closest girlfriends. Not that we need an excuse.
2. You don't have to smile through gritted teeth when you get crotchless panties as a gift.
3. There's no better night to pick up guaranteed-single men at the bar.
4. You can see if you really can make it through the whole winter without shaving your legs.
5. You don't have to listen to anyone's "Valentine's Day is just a made-up commercial holiday, blah blah blah" speech.
6. It's the perfect day to blow your New Year's resolution to eat healthy by buying yourself a box of chocolates--Godiva, not supermarket-brand.
7. There's no better time to practice some self-love with a shopping spree at Babeland.
8. You're not spending it with that idiot you spent last Valentine's Day with.
9. It's perfectly acceptable to spend the day working late, eat Chinese take-out for dinner in your extra-large fleece pajamas, and not put out before you go to bed.
10. You can
From flat-screen TVs to mail-order meat, the ten best Valentine's gifts for men.Read More »from 10 Best Valentine's Day Gifts for Men
muharrem öner/iStock Images1. If he likes his martini shaken, not stirred, he'll love feeling like a hot shot with a barware set.
2. You'll never get him to admit he's lost, so keep him on the right track with a GPS system.
3. Chances are, over the years, his wallet has taken on a bulky, spherical shape--encourage him to throw out those receipts from 1998 with a new leather wallet.
4. Guarantee yourself a year of cozy nights in--sign him up for a Netflix subscription and load it up with his favorite movies.
5. You know that favorite fitted black t-shirt of his--the one that looks as worn as it is? Instead of breaking his heart by using it as a dust rag, replace it with a few new, intact tees in the same brand and style that he loves.
6. Wow him with lingerie--but suck it up and get him something that's more his taste than yours. He'll appreciate the sacrifice--probably so much that you'll only have to wear it for a few minutes.
Jordan Strauss/Wire ImageNicole Richie and Joel Madden We're loving Nicole's transformation from Hilton sidekick and borderline train wreck to devoted and healthy mom - and Good Charlotte musician Joel Madden seems like her perfect match.Read More »from 7 Celebrity Couples We Love and Love to Hate
Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo Hey, we're happy you're happy, Jess - but do we really need to hear about your relationship from you, Tony, your dad, and thousands of Romo's fans? It almost makes us miss Nick Lachey. Almost.
Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson We're always rooting for Lindsay - and she's certainly seemed to be on the right track since getting together with Sam. She even gushed to us about their relationship - but news of jealousy and fighting have us thinking that a night at home and out of the clubs might do them some good.
Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony We can't help but notice that Jennifer is fond of teaming up with her significant other on various creative projects - we just hope she remembers Gigli and keeps the duets to a minimum.
Heidi Montag and Spencer
S Granitz/Wire Image1. What's your ideal way to spend Valentine's Day with your new man?Read More »from Who Is Your Celebrity Valentine?
A. A night out, hitting the hottest clubs and bars, and showing each other off.
B. With a night of cheesy romance, complete with a candlelit dinner, staring into each other's eyes, and whispering sweet nothings into his ear.
C. Dinner at your favorite restaurant, followed by tickets to a comedy show or play.
D. A cozy night in, with a low-key homemade dinner and your latest Netflix picks.
2. When men you date describe their ex-girlfriends, they usually sound:
A. like party girls--fun, but a little crazy
B. a little high-maintenance
C. cool, like women you would probably get along with really well.
D. like they wore the pants in the relationship.
3. You've decided to try online dating. Which profiles do you bookmark?
A. The best-looking guys in a 5-mile radius. Why not start with the cream of the crop?
B. The men who say they're looking for a serious relationship. If you wanted a fling, you'd go to the bar.
The victims of Bernard Madoff's breathtaking $50 billion swindle may be short on cash these days, but they've got plenty of blame to pass around. A recent target: Meaghan Cheung, the 37-year old S.E.C. regulator who gave the Manhattan-based fraudster the all-clear back in 2006, despite warnings from tipsters and her own probe in which she found "no evidence of fraud." Turns out, there was plenty. Now - thanks, Google! - Cheung will forever be linked to the world's most notorious scammer. "I worked very hard for 10 years to make a career and a reputation that has been destroyed in a month," she whimpered to a reporter earlier this year. Other recent incidents have us wondering whether these cases are examples of a sloppy work ethic, incompetence, or wince-worthy proof that women still feel hamstrung about dissenting in the office.Read More »from Women We Wish Were Better At Their Jobs
Andrea Hurst, Julia Flescaker and Natalee Rosenstein
Herman Rosenblat's agent, publicist and editor (respectively) allegedly pushed for
Suddenly, women in their 20s are flocking to fertility centers, hoping to increase their odds of one day getting pregnant. Here's what they - and you - need to know.Read More »from Truth or Myth: What Really Affects Fertility?
Kenji TomaThe Pill - MYTH. It's entirely possible to get pregnant during your first cycle off the Pill, says Dr. Mary Jane Minkin, a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the Yale School of Medicine. "There's even some evidence that women who go off the Pill have a slightly higher incidence of twins if they conceive that first month," she says. Post-Pill babies face no extra health risks.
Polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) - TRUTH. Also known as Syndrome O, PCOS is one of the most common causes of infertility - the syndrome is accompanied by hormonal fluctuations or imbalances that can interfere with ovulation. Symptoms include irregular periods and increased hair growth on the face, stomach, and back, as well as acne and weight gain.
Previous births - MYTH. Having already had a baby doesn't guarantee that you have viable eggs
Insomnia plagues more than 50 million Americans - but can we ditch the fast-fix meds in favor of a healthier long-term solution?Read More »from Better in Bed: Do You Need a Sleep Makeover?
"I can't sleep through the night"
AMANDA ZISKIN, 34, personal assistant; single; Brooklyn
Lise Gagn/iStock ImagesAmanda's Sleep Situation: My work sometimes has me out late during the week, so I typically get to bed between midnight and 2 a.m., then wake up between 8 and 10 a.m. Since it takes me nearly two hours to fall asleep, I keep my laptop and iPhone in bed with me and have the TV on. Lately, I've been waking up around 3:45 a.m. and can't get back to sleep until 6. I'm very energetic during the day, so it doesn't take a toll on me, but I do sometimes rely on Nyquil, Tylenol PM, Simply Sleep, or Ambien to fall asleep faster. I alternate because one never works for me consistently."
The Doc's Diagnosis: "Amanda isn't getting enough good-quality sleep. Her high energy level during the day helps her compensate, and she could probably go on like this for another 10 to 15 years -
- Marie Claire | Author Blog Posts – Tue, Jan 27, 2009 7:38 PM EST
Web Watch: Taking (Second) LivesRead More »from Break My Virtual Heart and I'll Boil Your Virtual Rabbit
Alleged crimes committed in online worlds are getting real people in real trouble:
meez.comBut our digital selves got along so well.
Kimberly Jernigan, 33, of Durham, NC, was arrested last August for attempted kidnapping. Her avatar had been dating another in Second Life - the 3-D community with more than 15 million users - but when the two players met in the flesh, the guy felt no sparks. Jernigan was picked up after fleeing the man's home, leaving behind a Taser, a BB gun, handcuffs, and duct tape.
heck hath no fury like an avatar scorned.
Last fall, a 43-year-old Japanese piano teacher who played that country's wildly popular online role-playing game Maple Story, was "married" to another player. But when he abruptly divorced her without explanation, she hacked into his game account and killed his avatar. The actual woman could face actual jail time for illegal access and manipulating data.
Are there virtual patent lawyers?
In the first of what could be