Believe it or not, men sometimes fake it too. My friend Alex's "first time" story is rather typical: equal parts awkwardness and pleasure finishing with a big, faked orgasm.
"At some point I realized that as pleasant as the sensation was, this particular stroking motion from intercourse wasn't going to lead me to an orgasm," Alex explains. "So when it seemed like the right time, I grimaced, made some appropriate noises, and no one was the wiser."
What makes this story atypical is that Alex is a man.
That men reach orgasm easily and definitely whereas women work long and hard to get there (if they get there at all) is a myth, according to sex educator Carol Queen, director of San Francisco's Center for Sex and Culture.
"Some women can get turned on and come just as quickly as any man; and plenty of men take a long time to get aroused enough to go forward with direct genital contact, need extra sources of mental or physical stimulation to get that turned on, and have difficulty achieving orgasm during partnered sex," Queen
Blog Posts by YourTango.com
The "Lipstick Effect": Do Hard Economic Times Make Women More Attractive?
By YourTango.com | Love + Sex – Fri, Sep 14, 2012 5:36 PM EDT
Read More »from The "Lipstick Effect": Do Hard Economic Times Make Women More Attractive?
A new study claims women buy more beauty products when the economy is down.The recession is still hitting us hard four years after it began, and as a result, we've changed the way we shop, splurge and save money. But besides making us desperate for cash, are these hard economic times making us desperate for relationships too?
In short, yup, at least according to a controversial new study entitled "Boosting beauty in an economic decline: Mating, spending, and the lipstick effect," in which researchers claim that the economic recession has "consistently increased women's desire for products that increase attractiveness to mates - the first experimental demonstration of the lipstick effect." Basically, we're driven to buy beauty products in order to attract guys, particularly because of our need for financial security (which, apparently, we can only get from a man).
But some of us aren't buying into this. Jezebel.com recently published a rebuttal in which they noted that, "the findings are based on information from a very narrow segment of women: youngVIDEO: How to Get What You Want in a Relationship (Without Nagging)
By YourTango.com | Love + Sex – Fri, Sep 14, 2012 5:03 PM EDT
Do you feel like you're always asking your husband to do the same things over and over again? Honey, did you remember to pick up the dry cleaning? Honey, don't forget to put down the toilet seat!
If this sounds familiar, you might want to consider a more effective - and less annoying - way to get what you want.
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In this video, psychologist, relationship coach and YourTango Expert Dr. Amy Johnson explains how you can have your needs met without sounding like a pest. "The best way to reinforce any behavior and to get what you want," says Dr. Johnson, "is through praise."
Want to learn more? Check out the video above.
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9 Women Reveal What They Wish They'd Known Before Marriage
By YourTango.com | Love + Sex – Fri, Sep 14, 2012 4:57 PM EDT
Read More »from 9 Women Reveal What They Wish They'd Known Before Marriage
Advice Before MarriageSo you've met Mr. Oh-So-Right, and you're pretty sure he's about to pop the question. Or maybe he already has, and you're halfway done planning your wedding. You've been dreaming about married life and. . . stop right there.
You may think you know what your marriage will be like-after all, you're in love, you've been living together for two years, you've met his family, know his favorite ice cream flavor and the list goes on. But the truth is, you never know how a marriage will turn out. People grow and change, and so do relationships. While you can't tell exactly how things will change, you can at least know where those changes might occur.
As your faithful guide in dating, marriage and beyond, YourTango has collected quotes from nine women about what they wish they had known before they got married. Live, learn, and be prepared.
1. Sex gets better! "I wish I'd known that sex improves over time. Everyone says that sex is only good at the beginning, but we have found that it actually5 Cute Babies Playing with Stuffed Animals
By YourTango.com | Parenting – Fri, Sep 14, 2012 12:31 PM EDT
CROCADILLY! Oh, and there's a baby in this photo too.This morning, we saw the most ADORABLE photo in People magazine. Unfortunately it's not online yet, but get this: Snooki and Jionni LaValle's new baby, "little meatball" Lorenzo Dominic LaValle, lounging in his crib with a huge stuffed crocodile MORE THAN TWICE HIS SIZE. And not just any stuffed crocodile, but Crocadilly, the stuffed animal who accompanied Snooks during all her Jersey Shore partying, and whom Vinny famously hung off the balcony much to her horror.
Anyway, can someone say: Ovaries. In. Overdrive.
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Because that's just how our lovely minds work, we decided to collect our favorite videos from around the web of babies playing with stuffed animals - in many cases, where the stuffed animals are bigger than the babies! Here we go:
1. OH NO. This one-year-old fell off her Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer! It's also much bigger than her. Sooooo cute!
2. Puppy love! We dare you not to crack up while Read More »from 5 Cute Babies Playing with Stuffed AnimalsHow Guilt About Our Kids Ruined Our Romantic Getaway
By YourTango.com | Team Mom – Fri, Sep 14, 2012 12:11 PM EDT
Read More »from How Guilt About Our Kids Ruined Our Romantic Getaway
It's hard to leave someone this cute behind.Like many parents, guilt and obligation threw a wrench into our romantic vacation plans. The kids are back at school, the leaves are starting to turn and fall, the blow-up pool's been packed away for another year. Summer is unofficially over.
As far as summers go, I really can't complain: There were plenty of water fights, backyard BBQs, mornings spent digging up slimy, hidden treasures at the beach. The kids had a blast, and so did we-even though it wasn't exactly the kind of fun my husband and I had in mind.
We started the year with one goal in mind: A grown-up vacation, without our two daughters. No deadlines, no early morning wake-ups, no dirty diapers or time-out chairs. We planned to go to New York, the same place we'd honeymooned almost a decade ago. I live and breathe my little girls, but I have to admit that hotel bath robes and late night bottles of wine sounded like a little slice of heaven.
More From YourTango: Why Travel? 8 Benefits Of A Great Vacation
It's nice to knowVIDEO: Help! We Haven't Had Sex Since Our Baby was Born
By YourTango.com | Parenting – Fri, Sep 14, 2012 11:29 AM EDT
If it's been months since your baby was born and you still can't muster a fraction of the libido you once enjoyed, you aren't alone.
In this video, author, wellness coach and YourTango Expert Patty Contenta explains that it's quite common for women's sex drives to suffer after childbirth. And, when women suffer from low sex drives, they worry about the impact of a lack of sex on their relationships.
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So, what can you do? Patty suggests "being really gentle about the process," explaining that "you can't become a sexual goddess overnight." Therefore, you should try "[easing] into it with baby steps."
Want to learn more? Check out the video above.
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9 Sex Positions that Improve Emotional Intimacy
By YourTango.com | Love + Sex – Thu, Sep 13, 2012 7:11 PM EDT
Read More »from 9 Sex Positions that Improve Emotional Intimacy
These sex positions help couples turn sexual intimacy into emotional intimacy. Certain sex positions facilitate higher levels of emotional intimacy. These positions allow a couple to go beyond their sensory experience, intensifying the intimacy of their encounters and imbuing them with emotional meaning. Eye contact, kissing, caresses, trusting, watching. . . these are emotional complements to the physical experience, and these nine sex positions promote that beautiful, emotional connection.
1. Woman On Top. A man lying down with the woman on top can be a vulnerable position for both lovers, which in itself can create emotional intimacy. He must rely on her decisions, while she is bared and exposed for his perusal. This position is ideal for lots of touching and intimate caresses.
2. Hold Me. In this position the man holds the woman as if she's just jumped into his arms. With her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms around his neck, this loving position is conducive to slow movements, passionate kisses and romantic swaying.
3. Enhanced Missionary. TheVIDEO: Why Men Don't Call when They Say They Will
By YourTango.com | Love + Sex – Thu, Sep 13, 2012 6:42 PM EDT
Has a guy ever promised he would call you ... and then he didn't? If it hasn't happened to you, certainly it's happened to someone you know. So, what gives?
In this video, dating coach, matchmaker and YourTango Expert Joe Amoia explains what's going through a man's head when he promises to call a woman, and then doesn't. "When a guy says he's going to call," says Joe, "and he doesn't, there's usually one of two things going on." More From YourTango: I'm Still In Love With My Ex [VIDEO]
Find out what they are by watching the video above!
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Why Moving in with My Girlfriend Freaks Me Out
By YourTango.com | Love + Sex – Wed, Sep 12, 2012 8:13 PM EDT
Read More »from Why Moving in with My Girlfriend Freaks Me Out
Cohabiting has put me in a cardboard box of fear.My girlfriend and I are moving in together, and I think I might throw up. Not because I don't want to live with her, or because I was bullied, tricked or pressured into signing a lease (my deepest sympathies to the guy on Maury who was threatened at gunpoint by his future mother-in-law). But let's just say that sometimes I can be a bit, um, "skittish" when facing transitions.
On the first wintry day of 2nd grade, for example, I refused to surrender my shorts. "But it's cold outside, Ethan," my mother tried to reason. "Today is a pants day."
Defying her logic, I attended school in a pair of gorgeous cut-offs, and would regret it by 1PM. Not solely out of embarrassment, mind you, for being the only kid in class to bear my bottom half to the elements-but also because I nearly froze my ass off at recess.
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My stubborn sartorial choices would continue. The next year, I insisted on wearing a colorful safari cap
