Blog Posts by Spinsterlicious

Last week I had a fun radio interview with Yolanda Shoshana on her Luscious Life radio show about making the most of your single life...if you're single just for the time being or forever. Read more:

http://www.thespinsterliciouslife.com/2012/07/a-spinsterlicious-luscious-life-radio.html

Last weekend I went to a dear friend's birthday party. It was held in her big, fabulous house in the suburbs. It being in the suburbs is relevant only because that's where I'm most likely to find parties made up of all couples...and me. Actually there were two other single women there, but we were a mere blip amongst the 20 or so couples. Or maybe we weren't a blip; maybe it was more like a beacon.

Shortly after I arrived, a guy approached me. He was handsome and smiling and I thought, "Oh, birthday girl invited a single guy for me. How nice." We chatted for quite awhile, flirting a bit, and laughing about his day and mine, and various and sundry life events. He was especially interested in my book, The Spinsterlicious Life: 20 Life Lessons for LivingHappily Single and Childfree, and asked lots of questions about my experiences as a single woman.

Then, his WIFE wandered over. I guess he forgot to mention her. At no time in our lengthy conversation did he mention a

What's the female equivalent of a dirty old man? "Dirty old lady" doesn't have quite the same ring-but whatever it's called, I think I became one the other day. (What I'm thinking is more salacious than "Cougar.") Anyway, I'm a single woman-of-a-certain age. I date, and I prefer men around the same age as I am. I'll generally go 10 years in either direction, but I really haven't been that interested in much younger men. Until now. What's more, he wasn't just much younger, he's a bit of a rockstar. Literally. So a better description of me on that night might have been "severely over-age groupie."

A friend treated me to a performance by Wyclef Jean --singer, musician, and all-around hot guy-- at City Winery recently. I knew it would be a fun evening, because City Winery is sized so that the performances feel rather intimate there. Before the concert, I wouldn't have called myself a huge Wyclef fan, though I like some of his music. I had met him years ago at an event when

As you probably know, many of the followers of The Spinsterlicious Life are single because they choose to be. Others, however, are more reluctantly single. They would like to be married but it just hasn't worked out for them...either a first-time go at it or a marriage that came to a premature end. Some of them politely (or not) "yell" at me that my single-is-ok mantra is over-rated. They're managing being single but would really like to be someone's wife. And I get it...kinda. Being single-not-married works for me though I do like being single-with-a-boyfriend.

So, I'm dedicating this blog post to real life, grown-up fairy tales that end with great women --all friends of mine--getting what they want. Helping keep hope alive...

Kacy is back with the man of her dreams...finally. They met approximately 15 years ago. They were both married to other people, but eventually found their way to each other. In many ways, they seemed perfect for each other: both

I think most people by now are aware of recent figures published by the U.S. Census and the Pew Institute about the growing number of singles in the U.S., so I won't belabor that point. Being single is "hot." Yet, when I hear a woman complain that she's miserable being single, I wonder what's really bugging her. Oh sure, like marriage, being single can be a challenge sometimes, but is it miserable? If everything else in your life is pretty good, I can't see how being single could be anything more than an occasional frustration.

Here's what I honestly believe: The woman who is miserable single will probably be pretty unhappy being married, too. To be miserable, there are likely other issues she's grappling with and it's just easier to blame her state on being single than it is to do the work she would need to do to get at the real problem.

But, ok, let's play along and pretend it really is the single thing that's got her so unhappy. Basically, if you have a sufficient number

Being a single, never-married babe, I admit that there are many things about marriage that I just don't know or understand. Like how I could have been expected to pick one guy, one, and stay with him for the rest of my life. And this one: why married women stay with their cheating husbands who, by the way, vowed not to do that.
Whenever there's a public scandal about cheaters, I always wait for the news that the woman has left. Usually she doesn't though. Elin Nordegren- Woods and Jenny Sanford are my heroes. They packed up their shit and got the hell out of Dodge when Tiger and Mark misbehaved. I know better than to make a declaration about what I'd do in a situation I've never been in but, I swear, I believe I would leave if my (non-existent) husband cheated on me more than once. Maybe even if just once.
But lots of married women don't leave. And I don't get it. Which brings me to today's blog post. Recently, I dated a newly-divorced guy who puzzles me. In two ways. And our

Paraphrasing Lionel Richie: Once, Twice Three Times A …Bride?! A couple of months ago I went to the wedding of a close friend. It was a small-ish affair and quite lovely. We were blessed with beautiful weather, the vibe amongst the guests was friendly, the food was bountiful, and the music was good. The pre-wedding reception was pleasant. Still, I felt a little weird. At first, I couldn't quite put my finger on where this feeling was coming from, but it became clear to me during the ceremony when they recited their vows.
I watched them gaze lovingly into each others eyes promising to "love, cherish…til death us do part. Aha! Here's where that weird feeling I was having came from. This is her third wedding, the third time she's made this promise. Read more…

http://www.thespinsterliciouslife.com/2012/06/paraphrasing-lionel-richie-once-twice.html

Lately, I seem to be inundated with articles about how hard and sad and pathetic my "golden years" are going to be. As a single woman with no kids (a spinster), I, apparently, am due for a pretty bleak existence as I get older. I'm going to be lonely and broke, and in poor physical and psychological shape. I keep seeing these reports, but I never feel as if they're talking about me. I'm not in denial . . . maybe I'm just optimistic. Or even a bit skeptical. Who are these people they're talking about?

Lonelier, Poorer: The Outlook for Some Aging Baby Boomers Is Bleak is the title of one of these articles; it ran in The Atlantic recently. It says that many never-married boomers don't have much of a support net, we're more likely to be impoverished, more likely to be disabled, and less likely to have health insurance. Goodness. This is almost enough of a reason to make me run out and marry the first guy who'll have me.

It has always been true that a segment of