Blog Posts by Em and Lo

This week is "Colin Week," in honor of our Yale intern Colin Adamo leaving the nest for the summer. Every day we'll post one of his own ruminations on sex and relationships. Today, he takes issue with Psychology Today's answer to our question, "Why is virginity still defined strictly in terms of penile penetration?":

The Psychology Today blog's over-simplified dismissal of Em & Lo's virginity question just didn't sit well with me, especially in the wake of dealing with the touchy topic in my own life not too long ago. No, I wasn't awkwardly fumbling through my first sexual encounter myself. In fact, nobody was: that was the problem.

One of my best friends in the world, let's call her Hannah, would be a virgin by Psychology Today's (and the rest of our society's) standards. Despite the fact that she's slept with nearly as many women as I have and, as she's put it, "given a ton of ----- s," she hasn't had the chance to partake in the "traditional" male-on-female penetrative sex act.

Very rarely are other people's dreams interesting...except when they're about sex. Dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tackles the case of the half-naked cowgirl who showed up in Jenny's boyfriend's nocturnal visions. Could his biological clock be ticking or does he just think Jenny's vajayjay is hot? Find out after the jump (right after you send us your own dreams!):

I'm 30, my boyfriend is 47. I would like you to analyze my boyfriend's sexual dream, because I'd like to get to know him better and get a deeper look into his psyche. Here's how his dream went:

We were on a ranch, the fields were bright green. Even though the trees were old, everything looked so plush, green and fresh. I was sitting on a wooden log with no panties and a mini skirt with my legs crossed. I was wearing a cowboy hat. He was wearing a cowboy hat too, a different one. He was stroking a guitar (which he does not know how to play in real life), singing in a southern twang, serenading me with the words: "Kiss an angel

This week is "Colin Week," in honor of our Yale intern Colin Adamo leaving the nest for the summer. Every day we'll post one of his own ruminations on sex and relationships. Today he tells us about his school's Last Chance Dance:

Last week was Senior Week at Yale: classes end, we have a week to study called Reading Week, we have a week of exams, there is a week where nothing is happening called Dead Week, and then a week of senior events and commencement called Senior Week--the university allows them a drug-tripping, fancily catered, do-nothing week that leaves a great taste in their mouths as they graduate in hopes of them remembering to donate when their big pay checks finally start rolling in somewhere down the line.

The Last Chance Dance takes place during Senior Week. This year's took place on May 20th at Alchemy, a nightclub in downtown New Haven. (Last year it was held in "The Whale," Ingalls Rink, where our hockey team plays, but a gas leak led to a premature evacuation, so

Teeth, the movie "we won't see so you'll have to," is being released in the U.K. on June 20th. Promoters have created a mock support site called Vagident, for "understanding one of the rarest female conditions." Because of our own irrational queasiness with the fantastical subject matter (intellectually we love the idea it represents, viscerally we're totally grossed out by it), we can hardly bear to peruse the site's FAQs (1. I think I may have Vagina Dentata, but I'm unsure who I should see--a dentist or a gynaecologist?) and Myths vs. Facts ("Myth #2. Queen Elizabeth I had Vagina Dentata and castrated Thomas Seymour, earning the moniker of the "Virgin Queen"). Despite our delicate sensibilities, it's pretty funny, albeit subtle stuff. In fact, it's so subtle, we're afraid more than a few British 'tweens and teens will take the site at face value and think this is an actual condition. In an age when plenty of young adults still think it's possible to get pregnant by swallowing semen,

We just read about this scandalous novel published in Germany, written by an English-born woman, Charlotte Roche, called Feuchtgebiete--it's been a huge hit, precisely because it's offended so many people with it's graphic accounts of sex and bodily functions (for example, the very first line mentions hemorrhoids and later there is an avocado core grown specifically for masturbatory use). It's soon to be published in her native tongue, and we can't wait--not necessarily for the raunchy sex, but because of this kick-ass quote from the author in The Guardian this past weekend:

'I wanted to present the whole package,' said Roche. 'Women aren't just a sexy presentation space, they also get ill, they have to go to the toilet, they bleed. If you love someone and sleep with them, you'll have to face those dirty bits--otherwise you might as well not get started with the business of sex in the first place.'
Amen, sister. That's the problem with lad mags (and even women's mags) these

aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Pretend it's easy like Sunday morning every day this week. Play some Snore-ah Jones, light some candles, buy a new board game and cook a few of your favorite things. Sure, your neighbors might think you're being held hostage by sensualists, but it's just what you need this week.

taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
Don't underestimate your powers of persuasion: you can have whoever and whatever you want this week. Okay, you can't have Brad Pitt or Scarlett Johanson on a bed of Cool Whip. And you can't have your own personal squad of fairies feed you grapes and lovingly administer you seltzer hi-colonics. But if you set realistic goals and stop short of begging, you can probably score this week.

gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
After months of chasing relationships that lasted about as long as a Pamela Anderson marriage, you're ready to pursue something a little more permanent. We're not saying you'll necessarily attain it, but damn if we don't admire you for trying.

Dear Em and Lo,

When my boyfriend and I started seeing each other he made it clear he had a problem with performing oral sex and so I've never asked him to do it as, after all, I wouldn't want to do something I wasn't comfortable with or wouldn't enjoy. However, after nearly 2 years, I must admit I do miss oral sex. Do you have any recommendations for making oral sex more appealing for him and broaching the subject? For instance, are flavoured lubes nice or do they just taste weird when they mix with my own wetness? Or should I just insist that it is a reasonable request and relationships need a bit of compromise?

Signed,
I Can't Think of a Witty Name

Dear Ictoawn (ha! sounds like Icktown, probably your boyfriend's name for cunnilingus),

Ooooh, that's a toughie. Now, if you wrote to us saying your boyfriend really liked anal sex but you really didn't and he was pressuring you to give in, would we encourage you to try it or to just keep your butt cheeks clenched for the sake of

Shame on us: we let half the month go by before mentioning that these 31 days are specially dedicated to self love. (Guess we got so carried away with proclaiming April Orgasm Month that we just plum forgot about Masturbation May). Well, you'll just have to make it up with double the wanking over the next two weeks!

We have Good Vibrations to thank for making May all about masturbation back in 1995, the year then-Surgeon General Dr. Joycelyn Elders got fired for saying masturbation should be a part of sex education. Since then they've been holding Masturbate-a-thon's, both private and public, every May, raising money and healthy libidos in the process.

Check out GV's Masturbation Fun Facts and Self Love Rules. Then take a gander at all of Daily Bedpost's self-spanking posts -- over 20 in all! -- to help get you inspired for your own masturbation marathon:

• Advice: "My Boyfriend's Banned Toys from the Bedroom"

• College Confessional: Let's Talk About Sex, Not Masturbation