Recently, someone asked me for advice on raising kids. She did this with a straight face. I mean, anyone who knows Junior will understand that I am not one to give guidance on this subject. But, for what it's worth, here is my repertoire of child-rearing advice. Please note this is humor. If you don't find it funny or are insulted, this is probably not the blog for you :)
1. Teaching your child to communicate is a risk. Oh sure, it sounds really cute when they are saying "Mama" and "Dada", but eventually they learn to string a whole bunch of words in a sentence and that sentence will someday contain bad words or worse, a smart aleck response directed at you. In public.
If you really feel you must teach your children to speak, teach them in a language that you do not know. That way you will not understand a word they say when they are insulting the dinner that took you five hours to prepare. Just make sure it is an obscure language, like ancient Greek. By doing so, you willRead More »from Parenting for dummies (or just for me)