That was the first big dip in the personal roller-coaster known as my marriage. Here I am today, a second child later, and I feel closer to the possibility of divorce with each passing year. I don't consider myself to be unrealistic, impatient or spoiled. I know that all relationships are hard and that there are supposed to be ups and downs, especially with kids in the mix. But I am still young and I don't want to look back in 20 years and think that I wasted some of the best years of my life in a marriage without the passion, love andRead More »from How to Know If You're Ready for Divorce
- A mother-of-two contemplates ending her sexless marriage.I am 33 years old, I have two wonderful children and I have been married for almost seven years. The first time I thought about divorce was five years ago, when I was pregnant with my first child. My husband is a good, kind-hearted man, but I began to hate certain things about him and all I could focus on was the negative. His temper, his drinking, his need to go exercise alone for several hours a day, and most of all, our total lack of a sex life.
- Babble.com | Love + Sex – Thu, Feb 27, 2014 5:24 PM EST5 Fun Alternatives to Couples Therapy to Strengthen Your Relationship
Though couples therapy seems to have a negative stigma attached to it, it is actually a good thing. And many successful relationships have figured out it is a tool to improve their relationship versus something they should be ashamed of. Blogger Michael Hyatt shared this quote from a counselor, which I think is spot on:
"The healthy people (relationships) get help, the unhealthy people (relationships) don't get help, and get worse"
When your relationship is healthy, you do your best to keep it healthy and don't wait until you're sick before taking action. It's no different from eating right, exercising, keeping your finances in order, or caring for your car. Preventive maintenance does wonders!
But I realize some of you, no matter how good all of this sounds, still don't feel comfortable going to a counselor's office, sitting next to or across from your spouse, and discussing the "status" of your relationship.Read More »from 5 Fun Alternatives to Couples Therapy that Will Strengthen Your Relationship
- 3 Ways Marriage Has Made Me a Stronger Man
In the past, I've written about how a hot wife helps a man have a better life. I've also written about happy wives having happy husbands. Both posts show two different ways marriage affects a man. The rumors say men don't really want to get married. And I know for some men, that is true. It was for me. Then I got married, and I realized what I would have missed out on if I hadn't.
Now, I've learned of a study that says married men are stronger -- well, at least that they have stronger bones. The YourTango article "Get Hitched: 9 Surprising Ways Marriage Affects Men" discusses research that supports this point. The research showed married men who wed before the age of 25 have far stronger bones than those who have never married or have been in a marriage that has failed.
So, according to this research, if you want to be a strong man, get married, and stay married! It puts a new perspective on things, doesn't it? I can only speak for myself, but I do believe I am not just aRead More »from 3 Ways Marriage Has Made Me a Stronger Man
Life inside a sexless marriage.
The first time I made out with my husband we had been dating about three weeks. I remember the first night we got naked together. His clothes came off and he was on top of me and I thought to myself, "Oh no, this is not going to work." I was not attracted to his body; I was used to being with hot, young guys with muscular, sculpted bodies. I was like a guy in that way: I needed a hot body. We ended up having sex and it was just "meh." I was disappointed--everything else about this man was just so wonderful. He was handsome, sweet, mature, confident, fun and he seemed to worship me. It was the first real thing I had felt in a long time. I just wished the sexual chemistry was more potent. But I told myself not to despair, and that sex can always be improved with practice and discussion. The next few weeks went by and the sex got a little more exciting. We were definitely lustful for each other and it was fun to be with him, but the mechanics were sorely lacking. I didn't like theRead More »from I'm in a Sexless Marriage
Just do it!
After waking up at the crack of dawn with the kids and running at full speed all day, the last thing you have energy for at the end of the day is a romp in the sack, right? While you and your partner might have all the reasons in the world not to have sex, sometimes it just sounds like good ol' balderdash.
If you want to keep the romantic flames alive but don't know how to balance your sex life with parenthood, you need to make sure you're doing just that-balancing the two.
Not only is sex good for your relationship, it's also beneficial to your health. According to Dr. JJ Levenstein, "Serotonin is released during sex which produces an anti-depressant effect and a sense of well-being and contentment. Also, phenylethylamine is released and triggers the release of dopamine from the pleasure centers of the brain, resulting in a blissful, attractive and excited state of mind."
Next time you feel like rolling over, remember this list of oft-used excuses...and then considerRead More »from 3 Crappy Excuses for Not Having Sex
Julianna Colt describes her fear of sleeping with her own husband.
I am scared to have sex with my husband. It's not what you think. The last time we had sex was six months ago when we went out of town for the weekend. It was OK. I was annoyed that he was drunk and that he couldn't finish. I was feeling particularly generous and loving that day, so I asked him if I could help him finish. He agreed. I smiled at him while I did my "work." I wanted to make him feel comfortable and secure, not embarrassed. But inside I was annoyed and angry. He eventually climaxed and rolled over to take a nap. I went to the bathroom to wash my hands and then I got dressed to take a walk.
That is the typical run for us: We give it a go, I never fully love the way he is touching me but the rest of it feels good down below. Then after a little while he slows down. I can tell he is trying to finish; he gives it a few good ol' college tries, but then ultimately he stops. I privately roll my eyes with annoyance and disappointment. "I am so tired," he says. I don't buyRead More »from I'm Afraid to Have Sex with My Husband
- 20 signs he's in love with you.
By Frank Kobola
1. He looks up the movie you've been waiting to see and surprises you with a date night. He might not want to see it, but he knows all the show times in a five mile radius.
2. He brings you flowers for no reason. Some women think this is tacky. It isn't.
3. Even if he's not very emo, he has a sentimental streak when it comes to you. Dude has never cried, but he keeps a sweet love note from you in his wallet.
4. He doesn't look at his phone when you're around. Flappy Bird and status updates can't win out over you. Suppressing the compulsion to check his phone, that's love.
5. He texts you pictures of inside jokes and things that remind him of you. Somehow, he makes grumpy cat memes romantic.
6. He wants you to hang out with his friends. This might be hell for you, but he really wants you around.
7. He tries to hold you while you're sleeping. You might wake up annoyed and sweating, but he justRead More »from 20 Signs He's in Love with You
- EMandLO.com | Love + Sex – Thu, Feb 27, 2014 2:47 PM EST
You've dated these Oscar nominees without knowing it.
Did you get a weird sense of deja vu while Oscar-cramming all the movies before Sunday's big awards show? It's not just because you can chart your dating style based on the Oscar-nominated movies (as we explained earlier this week) - it's because this year's crop of best acting nominees, in the lead and supporting roles, somehow manage to represent the archetypes of every person you've ever dated. To wit…
The One You Date for Their "Potential": Christian Bale, American Hustle
On paper, these people are all wrong for you: Maybe they're already married, for example, or unemployed, or a con artist. But there's something charming about them - maybe it's their incongruous body confidence, or their tenderness toward stray animals or children - that takes you off guard, and convinces you that they have the ability to be a great person. While you hang around waiting for this person to change, you find yourself forgiving everything from premature hair loss to infidelity.
The BadRead More »from Everyone You’ve Ever Dated, by 2014 Oscar-Nominated Roles
- Richard Lawson
Allison Williams and Ricky Van Veen
Girls star Allison Williams, who plays Marnie, the pretty girl nobody likes, is engaged to Ricky Van Veen. No, Ricky Van Veen is not a character in a Judy Blume book, he's an actual human man; in fact he's a very wealthy human man. Van Veen is one of the co-founders of CollegeHumor, the website that makes prank videos. (I'm told there are other, non-prank videos, but I'll believe it when I see it.) So that's basically a lot of money marrying a lot of money. Nothin' wrong with that!
Think of how nice their apartment will be. Or house! Could be a house. Maybe once they're married, Ricky Van Veen and Allison Williams will take to the country, or the suburbs. Maybe they'll buy a house in Rye or Ossining or Cos Cob and live a very sort of traditional life up there. More likely, though, is that they'll move to Brooklyn Heights and do that whole thing. Again, nothing wrong with that.
SEERead More »from Allison Williams is Getting Married
- Astrology.com Tarot | Love + Sex – Thu, Feb 27, 2014 12:50 PM EST
The Six of Wands card suggests that order has been restored. The competition or altercation is over, and you may have emerged as the winner. All eyes may be on you. Those who supported or helped you to come into your own or elevate you to this position are watching with particular attention as you may be riding high. Confident, motivated and popular, you may embrace this high-profile romance or new place of honor with pride and high hopes for the future, or through expressions of public or visible displays of affection or romance. Read More »from Astrology.Com Daily Love Tarot - Friday February 28, 2014
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