It's a lyric in the classic Beatles song, "Come Together." No matter the band's intention with the lyrics, the line has stayed with me because it speaks to my experiences with my own looks. I've been judged on them for as long as I can remember. We all have. It's the one attribute no one can see past, not immediately anyway. Those of us who've ever felt ugly understand the belief that we have to be attractive in order to be seen.
Despite how my parents remember it, I was an unattractive child. This made me vulnerable to bullies and invisible to everyone else. I have distinct memories of being treated differently because of my looks, both by my peers and by adults. Teachers called on me less, asked me to quiet down more. Peers picked on me first and picked me last for teams. A big, fat kid is never going to get the kind of attention she wants, and so the very act of existing is uncomfortable.
Once I grew into my looks, soRead More »from Why I Hope My Future Daughter Will Be Good-Looking