One of the more bizarre displays of "patriotism" in this country can be found every 4th of July in Brooklyn, New York. Since 1916, the city has hosted Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest. The event is believed to have started as a contest between two immigrants who wanted to prove who was more patriotic by the number of hot dogs they could eat. Or maybe they were just trying to impress the local Coney Island women. The historical record is a bit fuzzy. Regardless, the meaning of patriotism has now expanded. What was once relegated to flying flags and shooting fireworks has now grown to include one's penchant for stuffing vast amounts of processed meat in their bellies. Our Founding Fathers must be very proud.
The rules of the contest are pretty straightforward. Each contestant is charged with eating as many hot dogs as they can in ten minutes. They are allowed 2 cups of water, to soften up the food for easier digestion. If, at the end of the ten minutes, a contestant is still chewing on a hot dog, they can receive credit for it if they swallow everything in 30 seconds. Possibly the most important rule in this showcase is the "Reversal of Fortune" rule. If violated, the contestant is disqualified immediately. For the layperson out there, it means, "Thou shalt not blow chunks" during the competition.
American Joey Chestnut has held the eating title for the past two years. Chestnut dethroned legendary 6-time champion Takeru Kobayashi in 2007 by eating 66 hot dogs in 12 minutes. For those keeping score, that amounts to about one hot dog consumed every 11 seconds. By winning the contest, Chestnut reaped all of the spoils of victory. Chief among them, he could now add this important feat to his resume. As everyone knows, "gorging of food" is a highly coveted soft-skill among employers these days. Additionally, the victor receives a nifty mustard-colored victory belt as well as $10,000 in prize money. Presumably, the ten grand would make a nice down payment on an angioplasty procedure.
Somewhere, in the bowels of Johns Hopkins University, a nutritionist's eyes are rolling in disgust. And they clearly have reason to be concerned. If you or I ate 66 hot dogs in one sitting, we would shatter every FDA-authored guideline in existence. For starters, you would be consuming about 19,600 calories. The FDA recommends 2,000 in a given day. Women wanting to keep their figure in check need not apply for this contest. The 490 grams of saturated fat in these franks would be about 1,965% of the daily requirement. And do you have a salty/sweet snack fixation? Well, your sodium intake would register about 43,000 mg. The only way to counter that salty intake would be to eat a truck full of Hershey bars.
In spite of the dietary pitfalls, the contest has garnered quite a following. ESPN purchased the broadcast rights and has been televising the event since 2004. But should guys like Joey Chestnut be considered a true patriot? After all, he has stiff competition from our most famous Founding Father: Ben Franklin. Franklin is the only person to have his signature on all four major documents that created the United States (the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, the Treaty of Peace with Great Britain and the Treaty of Alliance with France) It’s quite impressive by any standard. And the feat probably didn't require the assistance of a stomach pump.
To learn about other interesting achievements of America's Founding Fathers, consult "Stupid American History" by Leland Gregory. Stupid American History and other Stupid Books by Leland Gregory highlight both the strange and the funny side of humankind.
