The worst thing about the Fancy Food Show? Mediocrity. Most products aren't awful; they're just OK. Disappointing. Unimaginative. Bland. So Esther Sung and I searched high and low for innovative products, new flavors, healthy solutions, smart packaging, and added value. We honored our top picks in a previous post: The "Best of the 2009 Summer Fancy Food Show." Listed below are products that intrigued us at first but then failed to live up to their own hype. Or just tasted awful. In other words, they scored points for concept but were docked for execution.
Super Ostrim Beef, Ostrich & Vegetable Protein
Nuggets
Supposedly, this is the only true food you can purchase at one of
those GNC nutrition stores; everything else is a powder or liquid.
And it's clearly marketed for bodybuilders and other gym rats
who seem to develop everything but palates. The nuggets looks like
turds, are very chewy and dry, and just barely pass as alternatives
to beef jerky. Still interested? The sweet pepper flavor (which is
actually spicy) comes across as the least offensive of the
breed.
Coneinn
Pizza
Pizza in a cone? No thank you. Call us purists, but there's a
reason why Steve Martin's Cup 'O' Pizza (as seen in
"The Jerk") didn't take off in real life.
Sartori Raspberry Bella Vitano
Cheese
This just seems like a fruity, forced marriage. Plus, you only get
to taste the combination of the two flavors (cheese and fruit) if
you get some raspberry rind in the bite. We'd rather add some
fresh fruit to the plate than have the cheese bathed in raspberry
tart ale like this was (no matter how classic and timeless the
practice may be).
Peppadew Goldew Fruit
They looked like candied yellow peppers. But these sweet piquanté
peppers didn't marry sweet and spicy especially well. Trivia
note: The name, combines "pepper" and
"dew."
Thai Smile Baked Durian
Durian is one of those must-try-once food experiences because it
smells unbelievably vile when first sliced open (let's just say
that gases are released) and yet tastes pretty good. By baking it,
you don't get the odor or the texture or the nuance of the real
deal. This version, a cracker-like snack, leaves an aftertaste that
only begins to suggest vomitlike decay, but it's still a
deal-killer.
by James Oliver Cury
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