Healthy Living

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Shut up already with the self hating

You already know that when it comes to body image, you can be your own worst enemy. After all, no one can take advantage of you (or make you feel like crap) without your permission. In fact, when it comes to weight, sometimes that self-hatey crap can actually be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Here are some things that I'm sure you've heard yourself say, but you seriously need to shut the heck up already, and start treating yourself with some kindness.
  • I'm so fat today!  No, you're you today. No more, no less.
  • The people on The Biggest Loser lose 4-8 pounds a week and I only manage (0,1,2,3,etc) pounds. I suck! If your bff said that, what would you say to them? Would you let them beat themselves up? The people on the television show are ON A TELEVISION SHOW. They work out for six hours a day and even past winners have had a serious yoyo effect, regaining weight just as quickly as they dropped it.
  • My legs/thighs/face/pinky finger is SO fat! Maybe it is. This is not a judgment or a failing. Geneen Roth suggests that every time you find yourself making these kinds of observations, you repeat in your head "and the sky is blue" after each one.
  • I was good/bad because I gained/lost a pound this week. Your weight does not make you a good person. The number on the scale does not affect the person inside your head.
  • I can't have chocolate because I don't deserve it. Eating something is neither good nor bad. There are no moral implications (unless you're bogarting your coworkers ----- e out of the office fridge).
  • This skirt wouldn't look awful on me if I weren't such a pig. How does an ill-fitting piece of clothing make any kind of statement about you? The assumption there is that the skirt is "right" and your body is "wrong." Maybe the skirt just sucks?
  • I won't find anyone to date/marry/shag until I lose weight. Except that you know this isn't true, and the people who would only date/marry/shag you if you met a certain cookie-cutter standard are not the people you want to be around anyway.
  • If I ask for low fat or no oil, people will think about or comment on my size. Oh come on, have you been to a Starbucks lately? Everyone special orders everything and honestly, they're all too busy thinking about their own worries to even pay attention to what you're doing.
  • That girl is so thin. Why can't I be like that? Of course, you have no idea what her circumstance is, how she got that thin or what she is doing to maintain it. And even if it's just the luck of the DNA lottery, isn't it awesome that people are all different and we don't live in some kind of Stepford town?
  • I'm so hungry, but I can't eat between meals because I'm on a diet. Would you purposely not go to the bathroom even if you had to go? Would you hold your breath until you turned blue and then curse your lack of willpower because your body needed to breathe? If your child's stomach were growling, wouldn't you want to feed them? If you're hungry, eat something!
  • Does my ass look fat in these jeans? Does your head look stupid under that thought bubble?
  • Oh come on, you're not fat, you're skinny! I'm fat! Don't let someone layer their insecurities onto your own! It's like herpes! Protect yourself and don't buy into their negative crap. It doesn't even make them feel marginally better, because really, if they are talking about how bad their cellulite is, then it's an unspoken judgment on your cellulite.
The comments want to hear the single word or phrase that comes to your head most often when you look in the mirror.

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From the Community…

Comments 1-9 of 9
  • liwiad3's Avatar
    Posted by liwiad3 Tue Apr 29, 2008 10:38am PDT

    I like the way you think!

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  • famouzkueendasia123's Avatar
    Posted by famouzkueendasia123 Tue Apr 29, 2008 7:53pm PDT

    wat da heck

    Report Abuse
  • buddingnovelist's Avatar
    Posted by buddingnovelist Tue Apr 29, 2008 8:40pm PDT

    The single word or phrase that comes into my head the most often when I look in the mirror: "Why can't I look like Kate Winslet?" The obvious answer to said question: "Because I'm NOT Kate Winslet!"

    Report Abuse
  • Tammy C's Avatar
    Posted by Tammy C Tue Apr 29, 2008 9:33pm PDT

    for me it is not so much talking dawn t my self i just have 0 motavatin, i do not thank negitiv i just do not thank of eneythanig at all. if i try to emagin me in a positve way its way way out of what is real. I go days with out brushing my hair or puting on make up. i know i can be pritty but puting on tuns of make up and sucking it in all day is just so overwhelming that after one week of it I am out for the count for the rest of the munth

    Report Abuse
  • SuccessTelevision.com's Avatar
    Posted by SuccessTelevision.com Wed Apr 30, 2008 9:16am PDT

    I love what Debbie Ford, the author of "Shadow Work" says about loving the parts of us that we hate. Here's a video of her on SuccessTelevision.com:

    http://link.brightcove.com/services/player/bcpid6154807?bclid=6165900&bctid=18579131

    Report Abuse
  • Charlene's Avatar
    Posted by Charlene Wed Apr 30, 2008 9:56am PDT

    Bottom line is this: Life is too short and most of us could exercise a little not only to loose weight, but also to improve our moods. Let's face it we are a large society and there are only a " select few" that we focus on... celeberties who are totally out of touch with us. Enjoy your lives because you only have one ride.

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  • hmcook29's Avatar
    Posted by hmcook29 Wed Apr 30, 2008 12:30pm PDT

    I would love to wake up every morning without my weight heavily on my mind. Why is it that my weight affects my daily mood? I hate that!

    Report Abuse
  • MARGARET AKA MAGGIE's Avatar
    Posted by MARGARET AKA MAGGIE Wed Apr 30, 2008 2:43pm PDT

    i wish we all can be happy with are weight, but we'll never be. So let's do are best and NEVER GIVE UP!

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  • Rockie's Avatar
    Posted by Rockie Wed May 7, 2008 7:21pm PDT

    I wish you ladies would not worry so much about your weight. Do you ladies know that most guys don`t care if you are a full bodied woman. You gals would make us guys trip on our tongues if you looked more like Sophia Loren (when she was younger and now), Marlyin Monroe and the eternal hottie Raquel Welch (without the additude). There are others, I should come up with some up to date ladies here, except the ones I mentioned have the most normal attributes as examples. We luv curves, not twiggies, unless you can`t help it.

    Report Abuse
Comments 1-9 of 9

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