Manage Your Life

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

6 ways to slack off at work — and get away with it

diego cervo/iStock

diego cervo/iStock

No matter how hard you concentrate, there will always be days when you can’t get down to work. The good news: You’re not alone. The average employee is productive just four hours a day, according to a recent study of 1000 British workers conducted by Cadillac. (The car company maintains that an executive’s most productive hours are, naturally, while driving to and from work.) The study found relentless phone and e-mail interruptions to blame for office ennui. But just because most workers slack off, doesn’t mean it’s employer-sanctioned behavior. If you spend more time Googling ex-boyfriends than filling out TPS reports, we’ve compiled our favorite ways to spice up a boring day on the job without getting busted.

1. Take Some Alone Time
Sometimes, you just need a change of scenery. Print out your work, and take it into the conference room to read over. But bring along some magazines, even a newspaper. No one will suspect a move as brazen as slacking off in a public work space. Observers will likely assume you’re doing research. (Have a quick answer ready in case you are asked what you’re up to. Here’s a good one: “I’ve got an idea for a long-term project. I was just researching its feasibility.”)

2. Stay Messy
A messy desk screams “busy bee” to anyone in your workspace. Keep piles of paper, old newspapers, and errant office supplies lying around to maintain the idea that you’re important and always busy. People will see the mess and feel bad about giving you any extra work to do.

3. Prepare Your Props
If you're the kind of person who finds it impossible to arrive on time, try the coffee-and-muffin trick. Before you leave at night, keep your computer on and put a cup of coffee and a half-eaten muffin at your desk. You'll beat even the earliest bird in.

Click here for 3 More Ways To Slack Off at Work — and Get Away with It


By Stephanie Wu

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From the Community…

Comments 11-20 of 24
  • Shannon's Avatar
    Posted by Shannon Fri Aug 8, 2008 7:37pm PDT

    I work as a janitor at a large factory and I definately see slacking everyday. I'm supposed to clean the bathrooms and break areas in between breaks.But between breaks there are more people in those areas,than there are when it is break. To me this is total disrespect. Everyone thinks me! me! me! no one thinks about the people that still have to have their jobs done in the meantime. I can't mop floors that are supposed to be mopped by a certain time with people standing on it that arent supposed to be there. But if it doesnt get done, then my bosses are bitching.People screw off in the bathrooms, bitching about how they dont get paid enough, but yet they spend their time mostly screwing off, and in the mean time preventing me from getting my job done.If you want to be another lazy ass, fine. But just try to remember the ones who still have a job to do no matter what.

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  • Jennifer K's Avatar
    Posted by Jennifer K Fri Aug 8, 2008 8:07pm PDT

    If someone can claim that they spend their eight hour day staying 100% focused on their work.... they are liars.

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  • Aurora's Avatar
    Posted by Aurora Sat Aug 9, 2008 4:03am PDT

    this is so dumb. maybe you should put your energy into working hard getting ahead instead of slacking off. people that put their energy into dumb ideas like this don't even deserve to have a good job, but then again if your so focused on slacking off then you probably don't have one and never will.

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  • Davian M's Avatar
    Posted by Davian M Sat Aug 9, 2008 6:48am PDT

    I must agree with mele.nani, just roger, sherralayne. I work for family services and take pride in turning in complete paperwork on time because that's how I get paid! The article is great for a laugh however if we want to keep our jobs strive to be the best and remember eventually if we slack off continuously we will get caught!

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  • mefh's Avatar
    Posted by mefh Sat Aug 9, 2008 8:06am PDT

    I wonder how my patients would feel if I slacked off during their dental appointments.

    Report Abuse
  • HeatherP's Avatar
    Posted by HeatherP Sat Aug 9, 2008 2:13pm PDT

    Nice. I love how this site always has articles up about how to "recession-proof" your job... Oddly enough, those articles don't mention slacking off at all! Imagine that. If you spent more time getting your work done and less time trying to trick your co-workers into thinking you're working, you might actually stand a chance at keeping your job.

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  • Serendipity's Avatar
    Posted by Serendipity Sun Aug 10, 2008 6:42am PDT

    This sucks.... teach people do their work right, or balance their life... but this... :S

    Report Abuse
  • Agatha's Avatar
    Posted by Agatha Sun Aug 10, 2008 9:17am PDT

    Can't believe so many people would need to slack off at their jobs, they must hate what they do. There's a big difference between taking a break, and doing all the things you really shouldn't be doing at work ie., one girl I knew at work spent the day planning a girl's night out and IM-ming all day on the computer.

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  • Laura's Avatar
    Posted by Laura Mon Aug 11, 2008 7:17am PDT

    I'm with you at Tilicious -- since I started freelancing, I find it really hard to justify taking a few minutes to nap. But sometimes I make exceptions. Here are some tips I use: http://buzz.prevention.com/community/laura08/need-a-nap-dont-fight-it

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  • Susie's Avatar
    Posted by Susie Tue Aug 12, 2008 5:50pm PDT

    I share a job with the worse slacker I've ever met and I'm about to throttle her. We share a large "cubicle" (for lack of anything else to call our desk) and her mess creeps over into mine. I'm not a neat freak, but my desk is clean at the end of the day. She's on vacation and there are piles of post-its all over the place. Her pen cup is overflowing with broken pens and dead highlighters. We share a phone and she saves all the messages from her boyfriend so I get stuck hearing them, and she never deletes messages from other people, just hangs up after she hears it, so our mailbox fills up. She gets about 15 personal calls a day. OMG, this has turned into a rant. I'm sorry. Sure, everyone screws around sometimes, but slacking off for 7 hours a day is THEFT and is as unfair for your coworkers to deal with as body odor and lunch-stealing.

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