How to Reduce Stress or Solve Any Problem

by Simon Sinek for Success Television

It’s 11:40am.  A perfect  day.  Not too much humidity.  The streets are alive with people.  I’m in a

taxi, trying to get through New York City traffic to Penn Station to catch my train to Washington DC, which leaves at 12pm.  My train leaves in 20 minutes and I’m still not near the station. The possibility that I might miss my train is looking very likely.  The perfect day vanishes. Oh no, I’m going to miss my train. How do I react?

1.      I cross my fingers and hope I don’t miss the train.

2.      I play over in my head of all the repercussions of missing my train.

3.      I sweat and get agitated.

4.      I start giving the cab driver “polite” advice on how to drive better.

5.      I beat myself up for leaving my apartment late.

“React” is the strategy and my list of reactions are the tactics – the tangible ways in which I would implement my strategy.  It is too tactical to start looking for alternative options for each reaction. It is too inefficient.    What I need is a completely different strategy.  I need a new guiding principle.  So what’s a better strategy than to react?

Sitting in the taxi – I make a strategic decision - I am going to "proact" to the situation.  Now what are my options?  How do I implement? What’s my proaction?

1.      I accept that I may very well miss my train.

2.      I consider what my course of action should be – get a new ticket for the next train which will probably get me to Washington, at most, an hour later.

3.      I ignore the factors that contributed to the possibility of my missing the train (traffic, passive cab driver, my leaving late).  They are of no value to my proaction strategy.

4.      I plan who I’d have to call in Washington, what plans need to be adjusted if I catch the later train.

My new strategy fully implemented, I notice something profound.  I’m completely relaxed and completely prepared to miss my train.   I sit back, enjoy the rest of my cab ride and the summer day outside.  My attitude also changes – I’m now enjoying the possibility of making my train instead of the fear of missing it. The situation turned from a race into a game. 

We need a new verb.  To proact.  If we have the verb, it becomes a viable and actionable strategy.   Telling someone to be proactive is passive, not as powerful, as telling them to proact (think of the opposite – telling someone to be reactive instead of telling someone to react is a very different instruction  - the latter demands action…but in the wrong direction).

A reaction forces us to consider what has happened to determine a solution.  A proaction forces us to consider what will happen to determine a plan. More>>>

• From Chaos to Control
• Stephen Covey Success Strategies DVD
  
  Simon Sinekis leading a movement to inspire people to do the things that inspire them. He writes, consults and speaks all over the world about the power of Why - the purpose, cause or belief that drives every one of us. Sinek’s first book, Start With Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action, will be out this month.