Work + Money

From the Community…

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  Posted by Girl Rider Tue Jul 8, 2008 6:04am PDT

  To support a family, sometimes things we don't like, must be done. Sounds to me your Hubby is thinking of your families best interests and future. I would support him.

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  Posted by MargyMay Tue Jul 8, 2008 6:23am PDT

  I am a mother of 3 girls and this month my hubby and i will be married 20 yrs. I am a stay at home mom and my hubby usually works 55-60 hrs per week, he makes plenty of money for our family and we make it work, he is gone alot but the time he is here our life revolves around him and we make the most of the time that we can. If your hubby is willing to put more into his career to benefit his family, i would stand behind him 100%, men dont come around like that to often anymore, cherish him, i know i do my hubby. best of luck to you and yours

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  Posted by springtime Tue Jul 8, 2008 6:47am PDT

  Good jobs are scarce right now. He has a goal for his family. Please don't kill that or you will kill a part of your marriage. You don't want to come across as Mommy Knows Best. Support him now. He may find that being away from his family is not all it cracked up to be. Regional drivers spend a lot of alone time. And , there's that gas price problem. Will he really be making more money in the long run? But don't kill a dream. Allow it to unfold and see where it goes.

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  Posted by jules Tue Jul 8, 2008 9:21am PDT

  i have been in a relationship with my fiance for 7 years, he is an over the road driver and has been since i met him. he was out more when we first met and sometimes he was gone 2 weeks and only home 3 days. your hubby is trying to better his family, and the better jobs do come along after you have put in your time. he has now stopped the long hauls and he pulls a grain wagon and is sometimes home 2,3 and sometimes 4 days a week and has has every weekend off. stand behind cause it will just make it harder on him and they dont need added things on their minds when they are on those lonely highways. sometimes its hard not having him there but when he does come home its even more special

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  Posted by Growing up is hard to do... Tue Jul 8, 2008 9:44am PDT

  My only problem is, is that I am not a stay at home Mom and our schedules now allow that I drop her off at 8, he picks her up at 2, when it changes she is going to be a daycare kid from 8-5... I know I should support his dreams but there have been a few trust issues along the way and I just know I will be wondering everytime he goes...

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  Posted by Mysterious Gryphon Tue Jul 8, 2008 10:03am PDT

  Men need to learn that it's the 21st century, and women do not exist to be homemakers and "little women" and just be waiting for them to return from making their own dreams come true.

  If your husband loves you, he will be open to a serious, frank conversation in which you air your concerns about his extended absences. If you have reason to question his fidelity (you mention "trust issues") or if you must continue working in order to make ends meet around the house, he must be open to compromise.

  The very moment he made a commitment to you - even before your wedding vows and the baby - he was signing up for OUR life, not just MY life. It's no longer about his boyhood dreams of a romanticised trucking lifestyle: it's about what's best for your family. Remind him of the promise to be home every night he made before going back to school, and tell him that he can't change the rules in the middle of the game.

  Don't settle for less than you deserve. Long-distance is hard, and being esentially a single mother is hard. You deserve to have your man AT YOUR SIDE.

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  Posted by eugenewise4 Tue Jul 8, 2008 11:32am PDT

  if that is what he wants to do, just supportive the best you can. i am a truck driver my family enjoyes the money, but does not like me being gone. hear is the truth the time away is the hardest on anyone who loves there family. my personal beleave is if you are having second thoughts talk to him because trucking is not what it use to be. to tell you something i am a owner/operator or should i say i have put my truck up for sell for the love of my family and looking for a local job. let him get his feet wet and find out for himself. goodluck.

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  Posted by duatadorothy Tue Jul 8, 2008 12:14pm PDT

  my boyfriend drives for a living he owns two semi trucks and you should stand by your husband. he will be able to drive locally once he gets over the road experience. and this might be good for your marriage you miss him and your time will be so special whenyou do see him

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  Posted by Anais Tue Jul 8, 2008 12:34pm PDT

  I agree with earlier comments that wives need to be a little understanding when it comes to husbands providing for the best of their family. I hear lots of complaints from both sides: either the husband is too laxed in providing, or he is too much away from home. I wish wives would learn to appreciate their husbands who are "busting it out", so we as wives don't get looked down upon as a bunch of complainers, and "never happy". Take it like a proud wive and spend the big chunk of change he brings to the table. Stop whinning and go shop!

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  Posted by iamdaphneblake Tue Jul 8, 2008 1:15pm PDT

  I actually have some experience with this. My husband and I lived apart for two and a half years, he was gone five days a week and home two. We had a 4 month old baby when he left, and we had been married 6 years. It almost broke us. I can not begin to explain how incredibly difficult it is. I felt that he didn't understand how difficult it was to be at home alone with my daughter, and he felt that I didn't understand how much he hated being away. Looking back, I know we made it because we had six years together before he left, and we had a baby and didn't want to break up, but it was hard! I wouldn't recommend it. I understand wanting to provide for the family, but maybe he could do the long hauling later, in a couple of years. Good luck!

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