Friday, December 11, 2009
Is virginity worth keeping?
user
- by Dough, on Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:30pm PDT
Hello Shine
Before I begin let me first tell you a little about my
background, my mother raised me really old fashioned and instilled
a lot of old morals into me when I was young. I was a bit of a
late bloomer because I was more focused on my school
then girls growing up, and now that I finished college I find
that I'm 25 with no previous relationship experience to go on.
Though it may seem outdated or rather cheesy to say
that I was saving myself for marriage, it’s not far from the
truth.
Technically I have never found anyone who I would
want to have sex with, all the girls I have met always have
something wrong with them, like a missing screw or begin unstable
or guy talk brings up some word of mouth story like the girl has VD
or some other horrid disease. I don’t want to
sound high maintenance or anything but of all the girls I
met none of them are ones I would want to be with.
Talking with one of my few friends he told me that I should
just have sex even if I don’t like them, that its unhealthy to not
have sex. I don’t know if its my old morals or if he was
begin shallow but is that really true? I have never had sex
and I am just fine aside from begin confused about women but then
again most guys who have had sex don’t understand women
anyways so it doesn’t make sense. Look I am no angel
ok I jack off like a lot I am sure everyone does, but it
would not feel right to me to have sex with a person I don’t care
about.
I don’t want to have sex until I met a person I
could marry; I will not wait for marriage because that would
unfair for her. That is how I feel but I need to ask you all, is
that really a good idea? I know its my choice and all but logically
is it a sound one? These are hypothetical questions but I do want
to know what you have to say, if you can spare the time.
Related: virginity, single, sex, love, advice
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Posted by ilovety Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:37pm PDT
god you are wonderful,save it till you find love.
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Posted by Traezy Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:46pm PDT
It's an excellent idea to wait until you've found the one you want to spend the rest of your life with if that is where YOUR heart and YOUR morals are.
The best advice I've ever been given regarding sex is to be sure both people feel the same way about each other and are expecting the same thing from the relationship. If one wants sex and the other wants love, one or both will end up hurt.
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Posted by Stacy Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:48pm PDT
I can only speak for myself, but i prefer a man with experience. I don't want to teach.....the more experience, the better. Not necessarily quantity, but definately quality is a plus and jacking off does not count as experience.
In addition to finding the "perfect mate"; My mother always told me "If your looking for the perfect man/husband, you're going to be looking a looong time because there is no such thing! All you have to do is ask yourself what you are willing to accept or not to accept." Everybody is human and we all have flaws and annoyances. You are just going to have to accept that, or be single forever. Nobody is perfect, not even YOU....
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Posted by Lex Wed Sep 2, 2009 1:01pm PDT
Ok, this is what I have to say about this. I wasnt exactly rasied like you with all the morals and stuff but personally thats what I think is right. Like I dont want to wait until Marriage, like you said it isnt fair for the other person, but wait until I find someone I really do love and thats I think we could end up getting married. Since your a guy finding a girl shouldnt be a problem because girls want a guy who isnt just thinking about having sex with them 24/7. Well I dont wanna speek for all girls because yes there are some girls who are "slutty" and all they want to do it have sex. Sex isnt an important part in the beginning of a real relationship. Even if your friends think its weird for you not to want to have sex or the fact that you havent had it, dont listen to them. Dont just have sex just because they said you should. Wait for the person who you really want to be with. Now, you dont have to take my advice or anyone elses here on Shine. Its all up to you. Its YOUR life. But you dont wanna do something you regret. If you believe in waiting for that special person then stick with your beliefs! Best of luck. I bet you will find that special person. Im sure your a great guy! Love Lex xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
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Posted by CANIS Wed Sep 2, 2009 1:41pm PDT
...Reading only the title on 'Chatter', my response is; Why?..Who the he!! you gonna save it for?...Nobody really wants it anymore, it's actually more of a problem then a virtue.
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Posted by Keshia M Wed Sep 2, 2009 2:09pm PDT
I come from a christian background and was also raised to "stay pure." Trust me it's hard sometimes but never ever let anybody tell you you're wrong for doing what your supposed to do! I've had my share of guys and I held out. Now most of my exs have kids (about 9 of em lol) and to think that if i had sex with them, that could be my child out of wedlock... you gotta think of the bigger picture of why God wants us to wait...
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Posted by swt19dreams Wed Sep 2, 2009 5:14pm PDT
I can name 3 guys off the top of my head who are 25-28 and are virgins. They are not geeky, nerdy or dorky and they are three of the sweetest men you'll ever meet. Two of them were in 4 yr relationships and they never gave in. I'm extremely proud of them and I recommend you waiting until you find that woman that you can't live without before you have sex with her. You'll only be disappointed in yourself if you just have sex to have sex and no one will have anything to gain from it.
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Posted by MARIA AMELLA Wed Sep 2, 2009 8:39pm PDT
keep it man! In my opinion, sex only come when you truthfully love are man or women. SEX IS NOT FUN BUT IT LOVE
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Posted by Ryan Wed Sep 2, 2009 10:15pm PDT
yes definitely wait n make shure with all you can you know with as much as you have that the one you choose isnt looking for just that asspect from your relationship as his main perspective
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Posted by Mary Thu Sep 3, 2009 9:28am PDT
I THINK YOU ARE DOING THE RIGHT THING WITING FOR THE THERIGHT WOMAN DONT LISTEN TO PEOPLE I TOO COME FROM CATHOLIC BACKGROUND I BELIEVE IN WITHING FOR LOVE AND MARRIAGE BEFORE HAVING SEX SOME PEOPLE THINK ITS WERID OH WELL
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