Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The Best Book Club Ever!

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While I do encourage the exploration of literature and support of new works, I do not care for traditional book clubs. My position has always been: if I really wanted to know what you thought of a book, I would buy it, give it to you, and have you tell me all about it. Books are subjective; everyone has a different take on them based on their own views and experiences. Invariably, you have a member in the book club who is insufferable with their overbearing opinions then you end up associating a perfectly good book with that b---- from the club who wore you out with her stupid rantings.

That's why I started the best book club ever. We read the same thing every week: the drink menu at the local bar. We are very academic with our selections as we started with drinks that begin with "A" and are working our way down the alphabet. We have Co-Presidents...which includes me and my friend, Judy, because it was our idea and we can drink more than anyone else...and our Recording Secretary/Designated Driver, Arthur. Arthur's job is to keep "minutes" of our meetings which may or may not include details of things we will have to apologize for later and, since he is a tee-totaler, to drive us home after a particularly lively meeting.

We discuss at great length the merits of each drink such as the ratio of liquor to mix, hangover potential, cost/buzz factor (ie: how many can you drink to get the desired effect without dipping into your kid's college fund), and if there are any excessive libido effects. This is particularly important because we can't have our members whoring it up at meetings...unless, of course, it is really funny and someone has a camera for evidence gathering.

Some may say that there is no literary value in our meetings but have you ever perused a finely written drink menu? The poetic genius that is required to come up with some of these drink names is unparalleled. Granted, most of it has to do with genitals or the pursuit of genitals but we mustn't judge an author's inspiration. Horny b------ s that they are...

So to book club lovers everywhere I say "You do it your way and we'll do it our way". We'll console ourselves with our mile-long waiting list and disorderly conduct citations.
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Comments 1-2 of 2
  • Emma Mae's Avatar
    Posted by Emma Mae Fri Oct 2, 2009 7:11am PDT

    Emma, I can certainly understand your opinion. I partially agree that if you wanted some one else's opinion, you would have them read the book for you. And since I love a good cocktail, I could see the merit's of an in depth menu review.

    But I do find other people's opinions helpful in deciding what I am going to purchase or read next. To me, it is a time saving thing.

    Emma Mae

    PS I have a recipe for the Golden Poofer. Tastes like a milkshake and hits you like a bat.

    Report Abuse
  • Emma's Avatar
    Posted by Emma Sun Oct 18, 2009 6:21am PDT

    Emma Mae,

    Thanks for you comments! You just MUST share the recipe for the Golden Poofer.

    Report Abuse
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