TSOL-LOST

Sometimes I feel like I'm in the passenger seat of my own life and someone else is driving, leading the way. I don't like it all.
It's almost like cruise control.
I'm not doing what I want to do, but moreso what others have instructed, advised, or desire me to do.
I know what I want to do, but I have to gain the courage to drop everything I have going now, and swipe my plate clean and start over.
Whenever I start thinking about lettting go of 3 jobs and putting a hold on my college education, I get overwhelmed, and chicken out.
I want to travel the world.
I want to put my life here on pause and grow and be alone.
Depend on nothing or no one but myself.
And REALLY GROW UP.

They say courage comes from within, but they also say, when you have a good thing, don't let it go.
I have so many good things here in California, but none of them are what I WANT.
Then they say, Life is what happens when you're busy making plans.
and i don't want that to happen, but it IS!
I just don't know what to do, how to let go, or where to begin.

I guess i'm just growing up. And as much as it may appear that I'm on top of all my s---, and know where I'm going and have direction in my life... I don't.

I'm Lost.