Thursday, December 10, 2009

Why Women Are Spending Less and Living More

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In my moms group recently, I asked the question, “What are you all doing to save money?” What I meant was, “How are you saving cash around town?” The answers I got clued me in to a core shift in our experience: the economy is changing not just the way we spend, but the way we live—that is, the way we enjoy life.

Our families are relishing more time together at home. When it comes to vacations, we are camping together instead of traveling. We are making meal plans at the beginning of the week and taking leftovers to work for lunch. We are saving money in direct proportion to the ways we are improving our quality of life. To me the ultimate satisfaction in this discovery is that our choices about saving are being made from abundance, rather than deprivation.

Last winter, the country was holding its breath on its way down to the economic bottom. Everyone stopped spending and did whatever they could to withstand the downturn. Now, we’re all realizing, Okay, we’re downturned. But I live in a beautiful town. I have a wealth of imagination in my community. How much do I need? This spring, it seems my circle of mom friends has discovered all kinds of ways to unclench and live large while staying within their means.

Redefine Your Joy
What I am most inspired by is that people are recognizing the importance of relationships over material gain. It seems there has been a collective look at the premise that having more stuff means living more fully. And living more fully means living in debt. Now, the collective conversation is shifting from debt to a family-initiated prerogative to focus forward. How do we keep our earning and spending in balance? How do we plan out our spending before we spend it? How much fun can we have together without spending a dime?

I have been getting calls from clients who are unhappy with what they have. They are feeling the money crunch and are not sure how to create a plan they feel satiated by. What I am noticing in the people who are making a positive difference in their lives is twofold: 1) They are sitting down to create a spending plan based on their earned income, and 2) They are getting creative about what makes them and their families happy. Instead of crunching numbers and transferring credit card balances, the positive ones are asking, How can our routine around money create and sustain a better standard of living? They are redefining what makes them happy, and putting their spending plan in balance with that joy.

If you think about it, you can probably admit that you had a high quality of life while you were in college. You just didn’t have the stuff we have as grown ups. And maybe ten years ago, your situation was similar…less stuff, more joy. Our current financial squeeze is teaching us the value of that quality back then, and perhaps reminding us of the resourcefulness of having less.

Sustainable Change by Skipping the Coupons
Instead of clipping coupons, and focusing in that way on deficit thinking, my family has taken to walking to the corner taco stand on Saturday nights for dinner. In a tumble of creative brainstorming, I recently pulled out all of my family’s membership cards, and gift certificates we’ve received, to places like the Zoo, and the museum. My husband and I have gone on three date nights in a row on the same single gift certificate someone gave us long ago. We have had a wonderful time, for free.

The message that surfaces again and again is that there are a million things we can do to maintain a standard of living over time that also affects our bottom line savings. Let’s keep the quality of our relationships, and work more on sustaining that quality with a plan, rather than reducing it. Creating quality experiences are more memorable (maybe even more valuable?) than money, and don’t have to cost a thing.

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