Parenting

Sunday, December 6, 2009

A guy's take on: Circumcision...why you shouldn't (and why you should)

by Cole Gamble

To cut or not to cut: that is the question. Any parent about to have a boy faces this quandary. In ancient times circumcision was a must. Lack of proper hygiene made foreskins a liability. This is the modern era, however. The old slice n' dice routine is more choice than mandate. Some of you made your decision the second you discovered the sex of the baby. "I'll chop the sucker off myself if I have to!" Some of you were a bit more hesitant.

The same problem saddled my wife and I two years ago. One of us was very pro-circ (wife) and the other less so. For full disclosure's sake, I myself am not circumcised and it doesn't bother me one iota.

So I laid out my case to save the foreskin. Here's what I told my wife:

 Penis Styling as Fashion

Save the religious exception, most parents chose to cut because they simply think it's a more fashionable look. The line I got from my wife was, "Girls like them better." To which I replied, "You married me, didn't you?" At which point she added, "Oh, but yours is 'special,'" patting me on the head reassuringly. Um, nice save. My father in law tossed in his two cents: "The boys in the high school showers will make fun of him." "Oh really?" I said, "Well then my son can just say, 'Dude, you're the one staring at my penis.'" Face it, parents circumcise because they want their boy to be like all the others. They're shaping their child to conform from birth. Is that what you want, a conformist? Do you want to a kid who is a genital sheep, or do want one who rocks the system with a penis with personality?

Great Names

All the euphemisms for circumcised are played out. Bald headed soldier. One eyed snake. Yawn. Think of a cut penis as a wellspring of inspiration for new names. Like "The Sleeping Bag" or "Mr. Turtleneck."

Men with Uncircumcised Penises Have More Pleasurable Sex

Okay so you're not giving a lot of thought to your child's future sex life. Fair enough, but many experts believe that circumcision leads to lessened penile sensitivity...

Possible Surgical Risk

Any and all surgery (and circumcision is surgery) comes with risk.

 It Is Not Too Much Trouble to Care For

 This was the big argument my wife trotted out. “You don’t want to clean it everyday, do you?” Turns out you are not even supposed to touch the thing until the boy is three, and by then it pulls back naturally and you clean it just like you would a normal penis. So there, you penis scrubbing fanatics!

Read part 2: Why circumcision is good


More by this Author:

Child Prodigies So Amazing They'll Make You Feel Bad About Yourself

The 26 Most Disturbing Kids Movies Ever

7 Classic Kid's TV Shows Clearly Conceived on (Bad) Acid

12 Pregnancy Myths

The Sh*t List: 10 Bizarre (or Terrific?) Potty Gadgets

Syndication:

From the Community…

Comments 41 of 41
  • X's Avatar
    Posted by X Wed Oct 28, 2009 5:16pm PDT

    Women's VaJayJay as Oprah refers to it has more folds and crevices than a man cut or uncut ever would. To come up with this non-sense that uncut are a breeding ground for diseases is ludicrious. Women have way more problems down yonder than a male ever would, gimme a break. They're always running to the doctor for something and does their MD immediately take a scapel to it? Maybe some of these women so bothered by foreskin would equally like to see the terrain of their privates surgically smoothed out. Gimme Break! You girls just have no balls!

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