To cut or not to cut: that is the question. Any parent about to have a boy faces this quandary. In ancient times circumcision was a must. Lack of proper hygiene made foreskins a liability. This is the modern era, however. The old slice n' dice routine is more choice than mandate. Some of you made your decision the second you discovered the sex of the baby. "I'll chop the sucker off myself if I have to!" Some of you were a bit more hesitant.
The same problem saddled my wife and I two years ago. One of us was very pro-circ (wife) and the other less so. For full disclosure's sake, I myself am not circumcised and it doesn't bother me one iota.
So I laid out my case to save the foreskin. Here's what I told my wife:
Penis Styling as Fashion
Save the religious exception, most parents chose to cut because
they simply think it's a more fashionable look.
The line I got from my wife was, "Girls like
them better." To which I replied, "You married me, didn't
you?" At which point she added, "Oh,
but yours is 'special,'" patting me
on the head reassuringly. Um, nice save. My father in law tossed in
his two cents: "The boys in the high school
showers will make fun of him." "Oh
really?" I said, "Well then my son
can just say, 'Dude, you're
the one staring at my penis.'" Face
it, parents circumcise because they want their boy to be like all
the others. They're shaping their child to
conform from birth. Is that what you want, a conformist? Do you
want to a kid who is a genital sheep, or do want one who rocks the
system with a penis with personality?
Great Names
All the euphemisms for circumcised are played out. Bald headed
soldier. One eyed snake. Yawn. Think of a cut penis as a wellspring
of inspiration for new names. Like "The Sleeping
Bag" or "Mr.
Turtleneck."
Men with Uncircumcised Penises Have More Pleasurable Sex
Okay so you're not giving a lot of thought to your child's future sex life. Fair enough, but many experts believe that circumcision leads to lessened penile sensitivity...
Possible Surgical Risk
Any and all surgery (and circumcision is surgery) comes with risk.
It Is Not Too Much Trouble to Care For
This was the big argument my wife trotted out. “You don’t want to clean it everyday, do you?” Turns out you are not even supposed to touch the thing until the boy is three, and by then it pulls back naturally and you clean it just like you would a normal penis. So there, you penis scrubbing fanatics!
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