Parenting

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Are you there God? It's me...and My First Period Kit

I'm trying to imagine how a pre-pubescent girl would feel when her mom sits her down to watch a DVD about her period, hands over a girly purse for a maxipad and then gives her a little bracelet that celebrates her journey to womanhood. I mean, I'm a grown woman and I'm feeling slightly embarrassed just thinking this hypothetical situation.

Only this DVD, girly purse and bracelet? It's called the My First Period Kit and DVD. For real.

Complete with '70s-inspired images, the DVD has pediatrician Chrystal de Freitas telling a bunch of young girls that "Puberty is the time in your life in which your body is going to grow for the last time." Talk about setting false expectations.

The pad purse. Most gals try to find discrete ways of packing their pads. A bright pink (purple?) pouch with a big butterfly, notsomuch.

And then there's the rubber bracelet, a la Live Strong, and it's purple with a butterfly on it. You know, to symbolize a caterpillar blooming into something pretty (if I could I would include a little emoticon here of the green face getting sick).

Here's the thing. Talking to a young girl about getting her period can be a little embarrassing for a mom. And it's ten times more embarrassing for the girl. But I think this type of kit would only make it more cringeworthy, right?

Just hand the girl a copy of the classic, Are you there God? It's me, Margaret followed by saying, "Read it. When you get to the part about a pad belt? Disregard it." Easy peasy.

In all seriousness, I applaud any effort to try to make it easier for parents to talk to their daughters about topics that could be uncomfortable. But does it have to be so corny? And there's the single dads with daughters that this product isn't even addressing.

Who learned about periods from Judy Blume? Who had "the talk" with their mom? Or daughter? And who would use something called My First Period Kit?






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Comments 11-20 of 59
  • RetroMom's Avatar
    Posted by RetroMom Thu Jun 12, 2008 8:22am PDT

    Why is this such a big deal for adults? My talk (from mom) was very matter of fact and included a demonstration of how to use a pad. Why does everyone think you have to get squeamish about a biological function that no one can change or make better?

    Get over yourself if you have a daughter and teach her what she needs to know. Don't depend on some ridiculous DVD with a bracelet and purse. With girls getting their periods at younger and younger ages now, these materials are not the greatest idea. Step up and be a parent, be frank and be understanding.

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  • JenM's Avatar
    Posted by JenM Thu Jun 12, 2008 8:32am PDT

    My dad tried to have "the talk" with my sister & make it a positive thing. It's not, it's painful, embarassing, uncomfy, messy and just a crappy ordeal all together. And something to symbolize "I'm on the rag" like a bracelet or such, is just an even bigger embarrassment. That's unbelievable that someone would actually create such a cop out to save the parent from squirming. Squirm if you must, but tell them the facts & let them know you're supportive of it with them.

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  • Sheelah N's Avatar
    Posted by Sheelah N Thu Jun 12, 2008 8:55am PDT

    I read the Judy Blume book. My mother was way too fragile to actually have a face to face conversation with me about it. I had my period about 2 full years before one day I found a note under my pillow "explaining" the whole process. She didnt even realized ii had started. Im 35 years old... I wonder if she knows?

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  • HatterasGirl's Avatar
    Posted by HatterasGirl Thu Jun 12, 2008 9:09am PDT

    What happened to "Mother-Daughter Night" at schools? I already had my period by then (I got it at the ungodly age of 9 - so mom's talk got rushed and covered up by the screming in my head asking why oh god why am I BLEEDING?!) but my 6yo SD asks about the tampon machine in the restrooms every single time we go in. I look at the above product as a marketing piece that takes advantage of an important and usually confusing time. We keep things pretty open in our home and I'm not really worried about The Talk. Judy Bloom may help - but really, it's just a part of life, a part of growing up. The bigger deal that is made of it - the scarier I think we make it for the youngin's. And the scarier it is for those poor single dads - THOSE are the ones I feel sorry for! A lifetime of going "nanananana Icanthearyou nananana" catches up with them at that point!

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  • Mimi-pz's Avatar
    Posted by Mimi-pz Thu Jun 12, 2008 9:56am PDT

    LMAO at peek2keep! I'm there in the same boat! 41 and my mother never had "the talk" -- we had a book called "Where Do I Come From" that explained sex and reproduction -- and I read "Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret" and "Forever." That was my lesson!

    I'm so glad I don't have girls....

    Anyway, I think I would have been mortified to have this "kit" and DVD given to me by my mom. It's not a "bonding time" between Mother and Daughter -- that's what shopping is for! And if I had a little "purse" like that one, I would think everyone knew what it was for, so I'd be embarrassed. Slip them up your sleeve like we did when I was younger!

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  • Mandy's Avatar
    Posted by Mandy Thu Jun 12, 2008 10:15am PDT

    I am a mom and I don't see what is so wrong with it. It's pretty too. I have 10 and 7 yr old girls and we talk about stuff but I can see this maybe helping the talk along. the pad thing she does seems like a good way to show it without being gross! I read Are you there god and it's pretty outdated by today;s standards so maybe video could be mroe relatable. the girls gym teacher taught us stuff in one class but no one said a word. Some friends I have are freaking out about talking about this stuff. Guess not everyone is so confident.

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  • kaliluna's Avatar
    Posted by kaliluna Thu Jun 12, 2008 10:26am PDT

    I think this is actually a cool idea, a way for mothers to bond with their daughters who are starting puberty. I find it sad that so many women are so out of touch with their bodies that they still hate or feel embarrassed of their periods. I think that this should be a time to be honored. It's not gross, it's natural and beautiful if you think of it in terms of your body being able to get pregnant.

    I had an older sister but my mom had gone through menopause when I was young so I grew up with only hearing my sister complain about her period. I'm not sure how my mom handled the talk with her, but by the time mine came around my mom was very frank but at the same time she acted like it was a special thing. I received a kit in the mail that had pads and info and what not and I thought it was very cool. I would have totally loved this kit when I was a kid, I especially love the bracelet, it's like being in your own secret club :). I don't think in any way it announces to the world that you are on your period.

    When I was 18 a neighbor girl started her period for the first time but she was home alone. She came over to my house as she was kind of scared. My best friend was home with me and we took the girl under our wing. We showed her how to use a pad and let her get cleaned up in the bathroom, then we took her out for a special lunch. I think all too often girls are given the wrong impression about their periods. They are told how it happens (which is good) but then given the impression that it is gross and that it is a burden, which is totally the wrong message.

    I have had issues with my periods for a long time and this last year was getting so fed up with the only options I thought available to me being plasticised pads and cotton and synthetic tampons. These made my body miserable during my period. A friend turned me on to using Glad Rags. They are made of super soft flannel and are shaped like a pad. You wear one for a few hours then change it, and you throw the used one in the wash. Easy! Plus since they are super soft and all cotton, they feel sooooo much better against the body! I know it sounds super cheesy, but since I got these I actually look forward to my period because I get to use my special new things!

    I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I just wish that women were able to embrace this time of the month instead of shame it into being something bad, which it really isn't. We need to be giving our daughters a better impression of periods and our bodies instead of carrying on the tradition that periods are a burden.

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  • Nikki's Avatar
    Posted by Nikki Thu Jun 12, 2008 11:08am PDT

    I agree with everything that you wrote..but most especially about the Dad's. I have a 14 year old step daughter who had the "talk" with her Mom, but when it came time for her to need to talk to me about it I sooo wished that there was a way to make it less taboo to talk to her Dad! I send her Dad to the store for things-of-that-nature all the time! He has zero bashfulness about it and I have told her that her Dad is great about it..very cool, but the perception of Dad's not understanding is frustrating!

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  • AllieCat's Avatar
    Posted by AllieCat Thu Jun 12, 2008 11:30am PDT

    My mom was the best with this. She and I started having our "girl talk" time because of my impending doom - I mean, my upcoming period. She sat me down and told me very honestly about what was going to start happening to me. She didn't want me freaking out about it if it happened when she wasn't around, so she showed me where she kept the pads and told me how to place one if I ever needed it. One Saturday morning when I was 11, my mom was out running errands and I had a funny feeling in my stomach. I went to the bathroom and there it was, and without missing a beat, I knew just what to do. When my mom got home, she hooked me up with a heating pad and just said a simple, "Damn, my little girl is growing up," as we watched a movie together.

    I'll never forget it. I certainly didn't feel awkward, maybe my mom did. I was comforted by the fact that mom knew what she was doing, and she made sure that I knew what I was doing when it happened to me. It took a lot of the "freak out" factor out of it, kind of knowing what to expect and being prepared for it.

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  • WV gal's Avatar
    Posted by WV gal Thu Jun 12, 2008 11:33am PDT

    I will always remember the kit I received, filled with pads, belt, books. My mom gave it to me when I got home from school after seeing "the movie" that day. I guess she knew!! When my daughter was 10 I started looking for a kit for her but was told they don't do that anymore. The DVD and pouch I could do without but I wish they had a kit like I received. My 14 year old daughter and I are very open about this. I can't say I'm always comfortable with it (I'm 52) but I do my best to appear cool and not embarrassed. Just different generations I guess. I could have never talked to my mom about it, though she would have been OK. It was me. I didn't even tell her the first time (and wouldn't use the kit for fear she would see!!) as my grandmother was there and I was sure she would tell her. Years later I found she called her sister as soon as I started!! She has been gone 26 years now but the day that my daughter started I called my aunt (mom's sister) to tell her.

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