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This week, October 5-11, is National Bullying Prevention Awareness Week. In effort to increase awareness of the prevalence and impact of bullying on all children, Yahoo! Kids has partnered with PACER Center to promote National Bullying Awareness Week. The stats on bullying are astounding. Did you know that more than 160,000 kids stay home from school each day because of bullying? And 3.2 million children are victims of bullying every year. It's not a girl thing or a boy thing. It's not just physical. It can be verbal and emotional, which can be just as painful and damaging as a punch. And it can start as early as preschool.
There's no slick trick that can stop your child from being bullied. It's a process, and sometimes requires many different approaches that are dependent on your kid's age and the level of bullying being experienced.
Here are a few things that have worked for me:
-Take it seriously. It's easy to say, "Kids will be kids" and assume it will pass. But if your child is coming home upset and is suddenly anxious about school because of the way a kid (or kids) are treating him, you should pay attention. Now, this doesn't mean you need to call the teacher right away. But ask your kid questions...lots of questions. What happened? Where? Who was involved? Has this happened before? How long? Is it happening to other kids in class? The key is to ask these questions in a way that doesn't freak your kid out and make him think he's in trouble. Remember: It's not your kid's fault.
-Drop your kid off at school or stand on the sidelines during recess. Bullying tends to occur when adult supervision is lacking, so before school or on the playground at recess. If you have a young child, pick a day and walk your kid to her classroom instead of dropping her off in car line. Or volunteer for yard duty one day. You don't even need to be near your kid. The goal is to give you a sense of the dynamics of your kid's class. And I can almost guarantee that if there's a class bully, you'll see her or him in action.
-Talk to other parents. Young kids are talkers. If you're friendly with a parent in your kid's class, ask them if their child has mentioned anything about kids being picked on at school.
-Tell the teacher. It's really important to let your child's teacher know what your kid is telling you -- especially if someone is getting hit. First, the teacher can confirm if they've been witnessing the same behavior...and let you know what they're doing about it. And second, if they haven't noticed it, they'll be on red alert and hopefully make a point of talking to the class about how they should be treating their friends. Most schools have a zero-tolerance policy on bullying. But if the it continues, you may need to take it to the next administrative level.
-Empower your children. Let your kids know that it's not their fault that they are being bullied. Teach your kids to focus on their own behavior. I really like these videos over at Y! Kidsbecause they offer simple ways for kids to stand up against bullying. For younger kids, I dig the book Bye-Bye, Bully. It's important to let your kids know how to avoid situations and react to teasing or bullying attempts (Walk away and ignore it.) And while we all don't want our kids to instigate fights, it's really important that they know how to protect their bodies.
Has your child already experienced bullying during this new school year? What are you doing about it? Share your tips.
