These Four Questions Might Make You
Scream.
Here's how to be prepared for tactlessness about your
pregnancy.
When an acquaintance of mine heard about my pregnancy from a mutual
friend, her reaction was, “Really? That’s so weird. I can’t picture
her with kids.” Needless to say, that’s not what this mom-to-be
wanted to hear.
If sharing your happy news brings cringe-worthy comments and
questions instead of congratulations, respond politely and
definitively—and then change the subject to something you’re
comfortable with, says etiquette expert Cindy Post Senning,
director at The Emily Post Institute. “There’s something about
pregnancy that makes people think they can say things they’d never
say otherwise.” Here are her suggested (polite) replies to some
classic remarks and questions:
“Were you trying?”
You say “You bet, and we’ve been having a great
time!” Humor is a great way to deal with nosy questions. Not the
cheeky type? Simply say, “I consider that personal, but we’re so
excited.”
“Are you supposed to be eating/drinking/doing
that?”
You say “Thanks for your concern, but this is
perfectly OK.”
“You’re so big already!”
You say “My doctor tells me I’m right on
track.”
“You’re naming the baby that?!”
You say “Yes, I love the name.” It’s hard to
combat an “I” statement.
Read more outrageous stories about pregnancy at
FitPregnancy.com:
Etiquette Check: Just say no to unwanted comments and
belly pats
Mom
Appetit: We are what I eat.
I Can't Believe She Said That!
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From the Community…
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Posted by Thu Jul 9, 2009 12:14pm PDT
Report AbuseI love your replies - to the point but still keeping the mood light :-)
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Posted by Thu Jul 9, 2009 3:26pm PDT
Report AbuseOr, just keep answering "YES" with no further details...you're so big...yes; should you be eating that...yes; Any additional statement gives someone the impression that you actually want to continue a conversation with them about a topic that is none of their business...and then they feel free to comment about how wrong your doc's opinion is, or how your child will suffer because of the name. The sooner you can basically shut them up, the sooner the 'conversation' will be over.
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Posted by Thu Jul 9, 2009 10:01pm PDT
Report AbuseIf an aquaintance told a mutual friend that she can't imagine you with kids, does not mean that she meant it to get back to you. So you dont have a response for her because she did not tell you that. It was rude but if you would have told her before the friend she would have told you congrats.
A person asks if you were trying to see how happy thye should be for you. If you say no it was an accident they will console you instead of jump up and down to share your joy.
Now the should you questions are 100% rude and inexcuseable unless you smoking.
The name thing noone should tell you that you should not have chose a certain name. I always tell people I love the name even if I dont.
Just remember some people have no tact and forgett to think before thay speak.
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Posted by Fri Jul 10, 2009 5:48am PDT
Report AbuseArrgh, how I hated the many variations on "you're only how far along? You are so big!" and the unsolicited belly rubs! I got nasty one time, I apologized but geez, it's hot and summery outside, I am huge and miserable and here is this stranger at the store who has to ooh and aah over my belly and pat me. I guess babies make everyone silly and stuff.
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Posted by Fri Jul 10, 2009 1:57pm PDT
Report AbuseYou should never rub a strangers belly. I only rub my best friends belly and talk to it. Her son will be my God son, I am also close to her daughter.
Never touch a stranger.
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