I Don't Buy Lots of Toys. Am I Depriving My Child?

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  Posted by avsgirl Fri Nov 21, 2008 1:53pm PST

  I never thought of it that way. Sometime I wish I had started out my kids life the way you have. I feel guilty about all the toys my kids do have. They break them, disrespect them, and don't care about their toys because they believe they will always have these things that they want on a whim. There has to be a happy medium between minimalist and "have it all".

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  Posted by lena_abf Fri Nov 21, 2008 2:05pm PST

  I feel you.....I don't think that a child would that much things (material stuff) anyway. I too am struggling but not a single mother. I always think that my son is happy the way he is. My nephew on the other hand have everything you can imagine. From the saucer to toys to books to DVDs but he doesn't have the same happiness that I see in my son. ( we live like 5 houses apart and my grandmother takes care of them) I guess my son still have those things to play with. Honestly I don't think that you should feel guilty of any way. Better to have food on the table than toys all over the house. (He is also happy just to have a McDonald happy meal toy once in a while) Best of Luck!!!

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  Posted by Anthea Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:26pm PST

  My neice and nephew have toys out the yin yang. And they really only play with a few. It's an incredible waste. There's an entire room devoted just to their toys, they rarely go in it because it's just too overwhelming! Books are great, and don't feel guilty about only having a few. Kids like to repeat the same books over and over. By the time he's grown out of this, he'll be big enough for trips to the library. I recommend NOT having a DVD library. I see too many kids glued to the tv and not going outside to play or using their imaginations. So many can't even wait in a line or go to a restuarnt unless there's some movie playing. Most don't even really watch, it's become necessary background noise. I think your kid will grow up healthier just for your minimalist approach.

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  Posted by crystal Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:27pm PST

  you can get decent kids books at a thrift store. they are usually under a dollar. even for dr. seuss. and I know those can go for like $7 brand new. books are always good. and blocks. you should get him blocks. that would be good for his imagination

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  Posted by Louise Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:37pm PST

  When Leo grows up he's not going to remember having an exersaucer. What he will remember is having a mother who loves him with her whole heart. Thats what's important. That and getting to play with the cardboard boxes that held the other kids toys. Nothing beats a good old fashioned box.

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  Posted by HotCrossBuns Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:41pm PST

  I have always stuck to the basics such as blocks, books, babydolls (even for my son!), toy cars and crayons and paint (once they know not to eat them) and tons of art supplies. Although they do have a few of the commericalized trendy toys here and there, my kids tend to gravitate towards the more traditional items like Legos, wooden blocks, matchbox cars.

  My kids have very good imaginations and have learned to make their own toys with raw materials. To me,that's part of the fun. Just the other day my son made a airplane out of two toilet paper rolls,a paper towel roll and some markers and crayons. He had more fun with that thing in one weekend than he has with his store-bought space shuttle that makes noise and lights up.

  My girls also like to make their own dolls out of sticks, acorns and ribbons. They have their own store-bought dolls, but they prefer the ones they make themselves.

  Kids are resourseful little buggers, and the more you let them use their imaginations and problem solving skills the better off they are in life.

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  Posted by patriciav Fri Nov 21, 2008 5:49pm PST

  I also have an eight month old baby. she doesnt have alot of toys. shes not into them that much shes very smart and is only interested in touching everything. since she laearned how to crawl shes only interested in trying to standup.

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  Posted by izzy Fri Nov 21, 2008 7:45pm PST

  My kids do have quite a few toys, mostly what they have received as gifts from relatives and friends. But their favourites are the old classics - a matchbox car, a bouncy ball, a well-loved teddy bear and books, lots of books.

  I buy my books second-hand (we don't really have good libraries in my town) from thrift shops, and buy them off friends and relatives whose kids have outgrown them. Every now and then, I do buy at full-price (since I can't resist the allure of kids bookstores) but not too many...

  What I've discovered is that kids don't necessarily value the object, as much as they value the time you spend with them. Some of the best times we've had involved cardboard boxes, paper airplanes and newspaper hats!

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  Posted by Fri Nov 21, 2008 7:53pm PST

  My best friend has completely spoiled her daughter with toys, and the whole house is consumed by then. I'm to the point where I can't handle going to her birthday parties, which she has every year and which a minimum of 20 children and 20 adults attend. She gets loads of gifts each time, most of which she can hardly remember receiving, let alone play with.

  I've always felt that when I had a child, I would work hard to make sure he or she does not get everything he or she wants. Hopefully, this will instill a sense of appreciation for the things he or she does have. I believe you are on the right track with your little guy.

  If you wish to expose him to more books in the interest of his development, you can always start frequenting the library. Most of them also have story times for children, so that doubles as a wonderful (and free!) fun activity for your baby. Best wishes, and thank you for your effort to raise and responsible child!

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  Posted by Me Fri Nov 21, 2008 10:37pm PST

  Look at it this way. By not having toys that tell him what to do and how to play he will turn anything he finds into a toy. You are stimulating is creativity and thinking outside the box.

  As for books. Well my brother and I had an abundance. I read them all, he did not. It is also an interest that needs to be nurtured but can be rejected as he is not the same as you.

  PS who said you needed new books? Second hand is just fine and a lot cheaper.

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