Momversation: Am I Becoming My Mother?

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  Posted by mommaofsun Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:42am PST

  I don't parent the way my folks did and there is no way in He%% that I will ever become my mom. My mom is NEVER wrong and she talks so much so fast, you canot get a word in, until she pauses to take a breath. As for me, I will 100% admit when I am wrong and I don't like to talk much at all.

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  Posted by blahblahblah Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:04pm PST

  Never say Never. I used to think there was no way in hell I was going to ever be like my parents either. But you just have no idea until you actually grow up and I don't think most people actually "grow up" until they are in their mid to late 20's and actually have your own kids. I have since come to realize that my parents werent nearly as stupid as I thought they were or as mean as I thought they were--turns out I was the stupid one and they only did and said things I thought were mean because they actually loved me and gave a crap how I turned out. Turns out that parents who don't have expectations and rules for their kids really don't give a damn about them. So I guess I am proud to say that I do alot of things the same way my parents did....go figure?!?!

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  Posted by mommaofsun Fri Dec 19, 2008 11:56am PST

  NEVER NEVER NEVER!!!! (LOL!! just messin' with you)

  But seriously, I did not have a memorable childhood and made a promise that I wouldn't turn into them.

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  Posted by La mamacita muy divertido y bonita! Fri Dec 19, 2008 12:48pm PST

  Not only do i sound like my mother but i sound like my father as well!! I am a crazy mix of both of them. I did however get their strenghts as well as weaknesses. I am sensitive and bossy. Caring and a control freak. Big ego with a laid-back personality. When i scold my young one i sound like each of them, especially when i'm angry. I have to remember to control this short fuse i got from them both!!

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  Posted by Susan Fri Dec 19, 2008 4:44pm PST

  My parenting style is identical to my mom's. In every way. It gets more obvious every day!

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  Posted by Grammology.com Fri Dec 19, 2008 7:10pm PST

  My style is my moms and my daughter is like me...in a way we wish we could break some of the cycles (my mom swore and so do we) however her values and intentions were wonderful..I wish I'd taken my mom more seriously instead of resenting so many things because as I get older she got smarter... I think my daughter feels the same way..

  Great subject..

  Dorothy from grammology

  grammolgy.com

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  Posted by TeguhS Sat Dec 20, 2008 3:53pm PST

  My parenting style is not different for my mother in positip way of course. I realize that people not 100 % truth although they want to teach you positip value but just in wrong style.

  I belive i become good individual thanks to them.

  I also have blog with the same topic.

  www.cheergrl.com

  thanks

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  Posted by Jersey Sat Dec 20, 2008 4:50pm PST

  I acutally have a little bit of both parents mixed in with my parenting style. The firm believes and values on certain things are still with me. At the same time I allow my children far more freedom of expression then allowed by either of my parents. IDK, you know how you felt and what worked for you while being parented. Even those things that you hated growing up can often be appreciated today as an adult. All we can do is the best we can no child is born with a how to manual..........

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  Posted by Chloe Sun Dec 21, 2008 4:18am PST

  My mom did a lot of things right and I find that those things she did right formed core values in me that I want to instill in my children. But she did a lot of things that were damaging too and although sometimes I am afraid that it's a cycle I won't be able to break, I have such strong feelings about those negative things that I think I will be able to break the cycle. For example, name calling or berating us as kids was really bad. She was a really young, overwhelmed mother and had three of us and she would lose it and unload. The hitting too was bad. I do believe there may be times you need to spank but my mother beat us old school and someitmes I know she went overboard. As a result we were afraid of her more than anything else and I don't want my kids to live in fear of me. LOL sounds horrid and sometimes it was but she also made us read everyday, took us to museums and other places investing in our cultural education and she taught us many other important lessons. We ate nutritional home cooked meals, not junk and my mother kept a clean home, she is very orderly and excellent with finances - which I learned a lot from.

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