Momversation: Punishing Your Children

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  Posted by Hannah Fri Jan 16, 2009 3:24pm PST

  its hard for us to spank the twins because every one says its abuse. where do you draw the line. when family says your beating your kids i want to tell them off. when they come over they. say stop dont go away and they dont. listen they get mad at me. but im beating my kids?

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  Posted by Brittany G Fri Jan 16, 2009 3:25pm PST

  Spanking a kid doesnt teach them to hit. I know plenty of kids who bite, hit & scream & none of them learned it from their parents. If you think spanking teaches kids to hit then you are crazy. Police shoot guns at bad guys but that doesnt mean every one is learning to shoot people & think its right. Its called discipline people!

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  Posted by Hannah Fri Jan 16, 2009 3:40pm PST

  i was beatin as a child. when me or my husband spank the boys i feel bad. but they listen to him more than me. i just yell and dont hit them till im done with what they are doing. but when daddy gets home its a whole new ball of fun. they do better with him. than with me. he says its becuse i dont follow through

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  Posted by Chookie Fri Jan 16, 2009 6:46pm PST

  Well I spank my kids. and have no shame of it. but before i did i used to sit them down and explaine to them before i did. i would give them a lecture first and then a spanken. that way they would know why they are geting spanked. Believe me when i say this they did learn from it., but now it's the additudes and the back talking . we are workin on that , we no longer spank them because they are teenagers and now i am trying other things like. ok first i put them on the spot and put them in my place as a mother and make them feel the way i do when they do something i dont like.,like ignoring me. ok so i tell them when yu need me to talk to im allears and now that im talking you wantto ignore me. ok Now i want you to listen to me the way i do when you need me to listen. it works both way. i think it working..

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  Posted by ralph Sat Jan 17, 2009 7:17pm PST

  There are things that children must go through to learn independence and aid their devilopment. Understand the difference! Remember your child is an individual and is not going to be another you. Get a grip on what is real and what is not. They must get away with some things and others are not allowed, know the difference. Then take a good look at your self often the child mirrors the parent. If your pissed moody don't expect your child to be happy go luckey, they also have to deal with you, the don't do as I do but as I say won't work. Many trates they will grow out of by themselves if you don't make a big deal out of it but if you do then it becomes an attention getter.

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  Posted by SierraU Sun Jan 18, 2009 1:17pm PST

  In our family it just depends on the kid and what stage they are going thru. My oldest I take away TV and Video Games, works great. Kid #2 I go the shame route, she stands with her nose in the corner. That works great for her for now, in a year maybe not so much. My youngest, maybe she'll break me. I haven't found her kryptonite yet, we do time out, which involves me standing nearby to make sure she stays in a time out. It's a little unfair for me, and all my husband has to do barely raise his voice and it's "Yes Sir, No Sir."

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  Posted by anonymous Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:13am PST

  I have an 8 year old little girl. She is very respectful and very well behaved. When she was younger and she did something inappropriate I would pop her bottom and only her bottom. I can remember the last time she actually got a spanking and it was over 2 years ago. Whenever I had to spank her it was the old fashion way (bend over my knee). I will not listen to people that say that you should not hit your children because there is a difference between abuse and punishment. On a normal basis she gets grounded or has to write definitions of words out of the dictionary pertaining to the wrong choice she made. In the instance that she does something like lieing to me or worse I think that would deserve a more drastic punishment so that the next time she thinks to do it again she remebers what happened last time. Again, I will say I am not abusive in any way but my child knows what type of behavior I expect from her and she knows that I will punish her how I see fit, not anyone else just me. I realize that there are people in the world that do not know what the difference is between a spanking or a beating but I do. As a child my father did not know how to control his anger and took it to far. That is why I have always said that I will not spank my child until I have calmed down. I normally ask her to sit on her bed and let me think and I will be in as soon as I am done. I really have a good girl but it is because I am raising her the way that I choose to not the way others think that I should.

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