scary-kids
They know your weaknesses.
Before you had kids you vowed you’d never become one of those people who always talked about your kids. Then you popped the little buggers out and realized your kids were the only thing you had to talk about since they were dominating your entire life. Wanna-be Hip Parents get around this two ways:
1) Drenching kid talk in snark,
“Man, my kid is such a butthole. And holy hell does he suck at Peek-a-Boo.”
2) Then there’s the crowd stories of shame and embarrassment, of
which kids just happen to be a never ending fount. Everyone loves
enjoying your misery, and in that spirit Parentdish put together a
collection of the most embarrassing kid stories.
“We were at the golf course where Daddy was playing a round. I took
my eyes off my son, 3, for a minute to scan the course. When I
looked back, he had dropped his shorts and was peeing into the
little golf ball cup in the middle of a green! Perfect aim, of
course. I’m sure whoever was up next to golf that hole had an
interesting round!”