Parenting
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Mothers: How long has it been since you put your own health needs first? (Plus, 6 posts to help you do just that)
editor
There was a time last fall
when my 4-year old son and I happened to be sick at the same time.
While it might sound crazy to someone who isn't a parent, most
of you will get that the norm for us is to pass a bug back and
forth for what seems like an eternity rather than both of us
battling it at once. But this time, there we were, a bed full of
misery and wadded up Kleenex.
It wasn't until about 24 dreadfully long hours in that I
realized that although I'd given my son his medication like
clockwork, I hadn't taken anything myself to ease my own
symptoms. And again, it might seem crazy to someone who doesn't
get up fourteen times in one night to feel the forehead of a small
child, but I just forgot to take good (or even good enough) care of
myself in those hacky cough hours. In my head I knew I needed to
give some attention to taking something - meds or a shower or a nap
- to feel better. But in my congested haze and probably four years
of self-conditioning, I just didn't follow through.
I am trying to be better about that, to
choose to take care of myself as well as my
son. That means tending to my needs in both sickness and health,
from scheduling a much-needed dental cleaning to breathing deeply
rather than freaking out through a mammogram to listening better
when my body calls for yoga to taking ibuprofen when I have a
headache instead of gutting it out.
Do you have a hard time putting your own health needs
first? What advice do you have for other mothers for handling
that?
While you are thinking about all the ways you want to (or do) put
your own health needs first, take a moment to read these 6 posts up
this week on Shine, each that will help you in being (and becoming)
a well mama.
[photo credit: Getty Images]
Related: wellness, sick kids, sick day, self-care, parenting, mothers, mammograms, health, doctor appointments, birth control
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Posted by Krabby Cakes Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:26pm PST
Hello jessica,fellow chicagoen,lol.I am one to never have the time to take care of myself.i work in a doctor's office so i don't want to be the one waiting 2hours to be seen.I usually wait everything out.Once i had strep throat for like two weeks.I drank alot of water and stayed away from my son.Eventually it went away.I'm suffering from migraines now but can't find time to take care of myself.
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Posted by mommaofsun Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:47pm PST
No time for myself either. Had the flu last years for 2+ weeks, and I still had to go to the store and get soup and 7up for myself, with NO help from my hubby. Thankfully, the kiddos didn't get sick.
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Posted by HotCrossBuns Fri Feb 20, 2009 1:28pm PST
With a chronic disease that can turn ugly in a matter of days, I make it a priority to make time for myself. I learned the hard way that when mama doesn't take care of herself, she doesn't have anything to give to anyone else. Even 20 minutes in teh bathtub while my kids watch a movie or read in their bedrooms is enough to get me through a stressful day.
Stressed out mommies/Sick mommies/Falling apart at the seams mommies: Who wants their kids to have that to look up to!?
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Posted by BettyM Mon Feb 23, 2009 4:53am PST
Hi Jessica
I am a grandmother to 3 and a mother to 3 so I do have some experience.
I didn't see you list asking for help anywhere. I know women now a days want to do everything on their own but sometimes you need to ask for a little help.
Most men can be taught how to do simple things. Bringing you a warm mug of chicken noodle soup or a box of tissues shouldn't be too hard for them. After all, when they are sick, don't we wait on them?
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Posted by PJ Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:23am PST
It is basic survival nature to want to take care of the child first, but sometimes it takes mind over heart to realize you must be at least adequate to do that. Non-drowsy meds do that. Put the sunblock on yourself first, then the kids. Redo sunblock on yourself also when it's time. Work at getting enough sleep, rest, water, veggies. Get some alone time every week. If you have to meditate on the toilet, then do it.
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Posted by Jen Singer Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:39am PST
When I had cancer, I found out how much my family could really do on their own -- and they did. When I got better, I didn't take all those responsibilities back.
If you don't cut yourself slack, no one will do it for you.
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Posted by Mammina Mon Feb 23, 2009 12:40pm PST
Ha that all too familiar. My toddler was sick last week but thankfully she s ok now but now its my turn to be sick. And to be honest I m feeling too tired to be around a bouncy toddler but some one has to do it and its usually mummy so here we go! No wonder it takes me so long to feel better again!!
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