Should your child sleep in their own bed?

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  Posted by amberr Thu Jul 3, 2008 10:48am PDT

  I don't think there is anything wrong with a child sleeping in the same bed with their parents as long as everyone involved agrees. When a child wants to be in his or her own bed they will let mom and dad know. In any case, the child should be in the same room for at least the first year. Even with a baby monitor you can't hear or see everything that could be happening.

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  Posted by choochiscute Thu Jul 3, 2008 11:22am PDT

  I don't think kids should be sleeping with their parents for a number of reasons. Mainly, because it doesn't exactly teach independence. Perfect example...my single cousin has an 8 yo that she let sleep with her from the time she was born because she (my cousin) didn't want to sleep alone. Now, 8 yrs later when she wants to sleep by herself, her 8 yo is terrified to be alone in her own room. So, because my cousin needed the "security" of another warm body in the bed with her for all these years, she's failed to give her daughter the independence that a child needs as a part of growing up and becoming their own person. In addition, when my cousin met a man and he began sleeping at her house the 8 yo was so afraid to sleep in her own room that she would sneak into my cousins room and sleep on the floor just to be close to her mom. They are going through the process of getting her to sleep in her own room, but after 8 yrs it's not as easy as they thought it would be. Not a good idea at all...

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  Posted by MistressMinx Thu Jul 3, 2008 11:37am PDT

  I think kids should sleep where ever they're most comfortable. In many countries, it happens for quite some time.

  My daughter is 9 and has slept in bed with me since she was an infant. As an infant, it was way easier to breastfeed in the middle of the night. No one had to get out of bed.

  After age 3 or 4, she slept in her own bed, but often would come in during the middle of the night. If there were any "adult activities" going on, they were long done with by then.

  2 years ago I divorced her dad. When she and I moved out, she did not want to sleep in her own bed. I didn't force her. She has since changed schools and moved again. She has had so many changes going on that I know she needs my comfort. I won't kick her out until she's ready to assert her own independence. And, she will. I know that sooner or later she'll tire of sleeping with mom and want to be a big girl, but until that day comes, she's more than welcome in my bed.

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  Posted by Brandy Thu Jul 3, 2008 11:55am PDT

  My son has never and will never share our bed! He has had his own room since birth.

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  Posted by Arlene B Thu Jul 3, 2008 12:18pm PDT

  While nursing my second, I realized that I could get some zzzzs while I layed there in my own bed. Mind you, it wasn't the most restful sleep, but it was very peaceful and relaxing. As soon as I was done nursing him, it was off to the crib in his own room. He had already done a lot of napping in there, so he knew what to do. Slept 11 1/2 hrs the very first night! (6 months old.)

  First baby didn't get any of that, and she turned out super-fine too.

  Just don't drink heavily or do drugs and then sleep with your baby. That is the number one cause of "SIDS."

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  Posted by Lisa W Thu Jul 3, 2008 1:29pm PDT

  I am a single mom without a boyfriend, so my 6 year old daughter sleeps with me. Its nice because she says "hold me mama" then tells me about her day before drifting off to sleep. I will cover her up and caress her while she sleeps and think in 10 years, she will be her own woman and I will lose these moments. But the time is come now and her Grandparents bought her a nice Hannah Montana canopy bed and we painted her room. I guess 10 years is starting already....

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  Posted by Ape Thu Jul 3, 2008 3:43pm PDT

  Well, I've slept with all of my kids for a certain amount of time. The oldest is almost 14 and my youngest is 2. My 2 year old sleeps with me. Kids will only cuddle with you for so long then they grow some and want to be a big kid. I want to cherish every little cuddle I can get while they're little. Babies are only little for so long then they have to fly on their own. I love my special sleep time, time goes by so fast before you know it they are graduating and leaving home. I just want all the time I can get with them. They are only little once.

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  Posted by DB Thu Jul 3, 2008 9:28pm PDT

  I have 6 and 4 year olds. When they were little I thought sleep training in their own bed was the key. Then I realized they needed me during those nightmares and they sleep better with us. Let them cry themselves to sleep seem so heartless so I brought them in bed with us. We also laid down with them till they fall asleep. Now they are a bit older, they can pretty much fall asleep in their own bed, sleep all through the night without crawling in bed with us. As for my husband and I, we find creative ways to spend time together. Kids will not be with us someday but dh and I will be around for a long time together.

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  Posted by VeronicaH Fri Jul 4, 2008 4:27am PDT

  We have three boys and they have always slept in their own beds. My motto has always been "Two people sleep in this bed and you are not one of them". They started out in basinettes in our room for the first 2 or 3 months - during the very wakeful nursing months and then onto their own rooms/cribs. Now, when someone has a nightmare or is sick, I go to them. Especially if they are sick...I can clean their comforters in the wash...mine is big and expensive, I don't want one of them throwing up on that! My husband is in the military and is deployed for months at a time...one of my babies are always trying to wiggle in then...but I "begin as I mean to go on", so we remain in our routines and they seek comfort in that...regular bedtimes, in their own beds!! When my husband does come home, he doesn't have to fight one, two or three for his spot on the bed. And, when he is home, he needs his sleep...I don't need him doing HIS job bleary eyed for nonesense. And, personally, I know I deserve a good night's sleep as well.

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  Posted by Guadalupe Fri Jul 4, 2008 7:24am PDT

  well kid's should sleep in their own bed because once they grow up there gonna want to stay with you in the bed and then when you get mad at them they think you dont like them anymore.I should kinda know that's what is going on in my house after the baby slept im my bed the baby just want's to just keep on sleeping with you.

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