I just found out yesterday that a sexual predator moved into the
neighborhood where my brother-in-law lives with his wife and three
young daughters. This child molester, who moved in with his sister,
now lives on their street. My husband wonders what they’re going to
do about it. What CAN you do about it? Short of move away, what
other options are there?
In the wake of the national news story of Jaycee Dugard’s rescue
from her 18-year horror story of captivity, this recent news only
has more significance, if possible.
It makes me wonder what any parent would do. Does it even really
matter? Should the newfound knowledge provoke more preparations,
more safeguards against the danger that was always out there
anyway? Is the known evil in the house down the street more
menacing, more imminent, more harmful than the unknown evil that
could have been there anyway, that could even be closer — like next
door? Like in the child’s classroom, or ballet class, or
church?
I ask because, though I understand the fear and disgust and
absolute fury my brother-in-law and wife must feel now that they
know there’s someone out there who could pose a threat to their
daughters, it baffles me to think that they might have never
considered this possibility before. Their children ride their bikes
down the street in the summer, they meet friends, walk to the bus
stop, sell Girl Scout cookies. Just because a known rapist lives
down the street doesn’t mean an unknown one wasn’t there
before.
Their mother watches them walk home from the bus — from the window
of their house. I wonder if she will any more. Watching from the
window didn’t do any good for Jaycee Dugard. Really, and I am NOT
blaming Jaycee’s step-dad here, but what good does watching from
the window do?? Clearly it wouldn’t help if someone grabbed your
child! How long would it take you to run down the street to where
the predator is with your child? Why would people think watching
from the window would help or be a suitable substitute to standing
NEXT TO the child?
My point is, why were my brother-in-law and wife seemingly so
complaisant before they found out about the predator down the
street? Did they think their neighborhood was safe? Was the unknown
really so much safer than the known? Is it now?
What would YOU do if you found out a sexual predator lives down the
street? Would you do anything differently than how you already do
it?
User post: A predator lives down the street
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From the Community…
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 11:21am PDT
Report AbuseYOU BET...I DON'T KNOW HOW IT IS YET SINCE MY 21 MONTH OLD DOESN'T GET THAT FAR YET BUT AS A PARENT I WOULN'T LET MY CHILD ALONE AND THINK A NEIGHBORHOOD IS SAFE....NEVER IS WHETHER YOU KNOW IT OR NOT.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 11:53am PDT
Report AbuseI don't think that we can live constantly anticipating the worst thing that can happen. I think that the best thing that we can do is to empower our kids. Teach them the best thing to do in any situation, and hope for the best. We can't teach them that it's acceptable to live in fear of the lowest common denominator.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 11:56am PDT
Report AbuseIt seems that my past readings have shown that most molestations etc are from family members or nearby neighbors. This also seems to be true of gay people. They don't seem to be any more involved than those same neighbors and family members. The people who do these things are teachers or church personnel or even the bus driver. It is up to us to teach our children what are proper contacts with people and what to tell their parents when a person seems to be over friendly with them when they are in an individual situation. Groups tend to make it a little safer. I also have noticed how little girls are made up to look even older than they are. This could cause one of these deviates to think that the child is older or more wise than they are.
Parents it is up to you to do your job and watch your child and make the rules they are to follow.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:15pm PDT
Report AbuseI HAVE A TWO YEAR OLD AND I BE DAMB IF I LET HER OUT OF MY SITE!!!!!!
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:35pm PDT
Report AbuseWell there isn't anything you can do about it besides talking to about it with the kids. No talking to strangers and all that. You can not do anything or say anything to the guy who moved into the neighborhood because that is illegal. Most places send sumthing out saying a sexual offender moved in just so you can be aware but you can not do anything to prevent them from living there.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 12:37pm PDT
Report AbuseOMG I just read a previous post. What is this about seems to be true about gay people? Do you mean gay people are child molesters? That is not true research actualy shows the majority of people who molest children say they are straight not gay.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 1:02pm PDT
Report AbuseTHIS IS SOO WRONG. I just don't understand why these men are not taken out and shot or kept in some compound all together castrated. They obviously cannot control their impulses and that's why they are repeat offenders. This is the absolute worst of all crimes and the tolerance that family friendly neighborhoods have to put up with is absurd. I'm sure somebody is going to say the predator has rights and that makes me want to vomit even more.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 2:24pm PDT
Report AbuseFirst, find out what the guy was convicted of. I had someone move down the street several years ago who was a registered offender. One of the mothers on the street found out and immediately went crazy telling all the other parents. After a bit more research, we found out that he was convicted at 19 of having sex with his 17 year old girlfriend. He was now in his 30s and married. There was no reason for everyone to be worried. He was a kid whose girlfriend's parents didn't like that he was sleeping with their daughter...he wasn't a sexual predator.
Most states don't have different registries for different types of convictions. This is sad because there are so many different types of sexual offenses other than just child molestation. Before your brother and sister-in-law worry too much, they need to do their research. Once they truly know what they are dealing with they can make an informed decision on their plan of action.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 2:31pm PDT
Report AbuseI dont care how politically correct or legal it might be, but I would go to the persons house with my child and tell the offender that if he so much as talks to my child I will beat them into a pulp. And I would tell my child to never go near this individual for any reason whatsoever. These people cannot be made better. Either take them out back and put a bullet through their head or castrate them.
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Posted by Wed Sep 2, 2009 2:43pm PDT
Report AbuseYou're right, of course...the danger can be there whether we realize it or not. The question for most parents is what we DO about those dangers. How do we protect our kids? you can't keep them in the house on lockdown 24/7, that's just not healthy. They need to be able to ride their bikes down the street, and play with friends in the cul-de-sac. The only thing we can do is warn them, and make sure we know where they are at all times.
I also agree with the poster that says you should try to find out what the person was convicted of. Some offenses are very minor..you could get put on the registry for a silly prank like mooning from your car. If he IS a child molester or rapist, the only thing you can do is be extra watchful, and warn your children.
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