Parenting

Saturday, December 5, 2009

What to do if your daughter likes a bad boy

It has always been a mystery as to why smart, savvy girls end up swooning over the “bad boy.” Nowadays, pop culture keeps us constantly infatuated with the not-so-nice guy. With his leather jacket and rebel-without-a-cause attitude, nearly every high school TV show and movie has one written into the script. Just think Edward and Bella in Twilight, Danny and Sandy in Grease, Johnny and Baby in Dirty Dancing, or even Elizabeth Bennett’s obsession with Mr. Wickham in Pride and Prejudice.

But, it’s not just pop culture too blame, society does put a lot of pressure on teenagers today to be perfect all the time. Girls say their attraction to the “bad boy” is because they are an ideal distraction from the pressures of their often picture-perfect reality. Attempting to master academics, sports, college, and the social scene, conquering a boy who is the polar opposite is somewhat of a challenge. It’s fun to step outside the box.

Is your daughter attracted to bad boys? Take this fun quiz with her to find out!


•    Do you feel like your kids are hanging out with the wrong crowd? Chances are they are not trying to rebel from you, but rather explore what is out there and in the process get to know themselves better. As long as you’re keeping an eye on their actions, it’s good to let your child live and learn.

•    Where do you step in? Although socially deviant traits and characteristics like tattoos and piercing or a rebellious attitude, can appear to be a sign that your daughter is hanging with the wrong crowd, it isn’t reason enough to protest her involvement with them. If he is getting into serious trouble or causing your daughter to break the rules, that is where to draw the line. Related: Teen shoplifting is on the rise. What to look out for and how to keep your kids out of trouble.

•    Make an effort to get to know him! It will show your teen that you trust her and even prove that first impressions may not always be the right one.

Read more on what to do if your daughter likes a bad boy.

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Comments 1-10 of 16
  • another hockey fan's Avatar
    Posted by another hockey fan Wed Aug 19, 2009 9:45am PDT

    It may be a phase you have to deal with. If you try to stop her from seeing him, she will anyway. I had my bad boy phase and it wasn't to defy my parents it's because I was insecure and had low self esteem so that when any boy took notice I was thrilled. You have to trust that you raised her right and she will know what to do when the time comes.

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  • ?'s Avatar
    Posted by ? Wed Aug 19, 2009 8:34pm PDT

    I try and make friends with my girls boyfriends. She hates this and if I really don't like them they are gone in a few weeks, I just make more effort if I don't like them.

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  • gigmus's Avatar
    Posted by gigmus Wed Aug 19, 2009 9:31pm PDT

    My son has that bad boy aura and the girls flock to him like bees to honey..... Then they find out it's all show and flock even more. Go figure - LOL!

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  • Jenny's Avatar
    Posted by Jenny Wed Aug 19, 2009 10:42pm PDT

    What to do? As a parent, you've already screwed her up. Don't do anything, get her a therapist to undo the low self esteem you've given her.......

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  • Steve H's Avatar
    Posted by Steve H Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:49am PDT

    unless he's dealing drugs or robbing banks, let her find out on her own what he's about. respect the intelligence of your children - they will wind up smarter than you or me. don't let your personal and selfish view of how life should be dictate your children's lives. remember when you were 16 ? so there.

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  • EW's Avatar
    Posted by EW Thu Aug 20, 2009 8:05am PDT

    Steve said it best.

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  • Andygirl's Avatar
    Posted by Andygirl Thu Aug 20, 2009 12:16pm PDT

    I wish my parents had stepped in with my "bad boy." They let me alone and he sexually assaulted me.

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  • St.JimmyHavok's Avatar
    Posted by St.JimmyHavok Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:10pm PDT

    I was always the "Bad Girl" that no one wanted their kid hanging out with or dating. Why does everyone try to see girls as innocent little angels and boys as the "bad" one? As long as he isn't abusing her (or vice versa) why try to stop them? They'll do it anyways.

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  • Frantastic's Avatar
    Posted by Frantastic Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:44pm PDT

    Yes that is my story as a parent. My son hangin with the "badgirl". He dresses real urban and may have looked the part, but he was far from what she thought he would be. (he's a good kid, no drugs or sex) well she was a few years older at the time. You could tell she had been around the block a few times.I remember that I tried to stay neutral a lot. Not reacting. I knew she was so not the one. She was quiet and sneaky. He got a little sprung but then it was over. It is a little painful to watch, and we made sure he wasn't in harm's way.

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  • Julia's Avatar
    Posted by Julia Thu Aug 20, 2009 3:29pm PDT

    most girls or at least every gal has to go throught the bad boy phase in her early life to know what is good and bad for her in her adult life. Bad boys lead us to good guys cos gals do snap out of the Bad boy era!!!

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Comments 1-10 of 16

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