Peter and Erin
When Erin asked me to write a guest column, I said yes because she’s awesome and has provided me free beer in the past, not because I claim any great insight into how women (or men) think when it comes to relationships. But there is one area where I might have some advice to offer. After several years of my female friends asking me, “How do I find a quality guy?” while I run into quality guys on a daily basis, I’ve come up with some questions I think a woman should—but often doesn’t—ask that can help determine whether the guy sitting across the table is a keeper:
Is he curious?
No one wants a relationship to grow stale, and guys who ask a lot of questions or are willing to try new things are better at keeping relationships interesting. A quality guy will truly want to learn about you and what’s going on in your life. He’ll be more willing to try a new restaurant, not just to be nice to you, but because he wants to experience new things.
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Does he have a hobby?
A guy with a hobby is a guy who has passion and follow-through, and those guys are less likely to flake out on a relationship when it hits the three-month mark. But beware the guy with the obsession. If he spends his entire Sunday playing Call of Duty, run the other way, because he already has his true love.
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How does he respond to being challenged?
A quality guy is one who is able to take challenges in stride without overreacting and without making things unnecessarily personal. These guys don’t sweat the small stuff, they’re confident enough not to constantly need to prove their manhood, and they’ll never try to win an argument by tearing someone else down.
Does he have close female friends?
A guy with close female friends is more likely to be better
boyfriend material. He’ll have a better idea of how to treat women,
a source of advice to turn to when he needs help with the
relationship, and once you befriend his girl friends (and he’ll
want you to) you’ll have powerful allies who are invested in your
success as a couple.
Do you think I’m totally off-base? What other questions help you
sniff out a quality guy?
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parts!
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