Love + Sex

Thursday, December 10, 2009

5 Intimate Sex Tips From A Man

Oral sex: brilliant, isn't it? It's ridiculously intimate, severely sensual, and you don't necessarily have to take all your clothes off to do it. Whether it's part of foreplay or an act in itself, being a skilled fellatrix ramps up your bedroom (or back seat of car) technique considerably. 

But trust me, there's more to fellatio than, as we Brits so tastefully put it, getting your gob round his nob or your gums round his plums. The best oral sex exponents use their mouths, their tongues, their fingers, their eyes, their voice and—most importantly—their brain (but not their teeth, unless it's been asked for). I'm assuming that you already know Rule No.1 about b-jobs—you don't blow—so here are the basic ground rules from a male point of view…

1. If you're not in the mood, don't bother.

Back in the day, fellatio was generally seen as something only depraved men would want, and only even more depraved women would offer. Thankfully, this has changed to the point where a bit of a nosh almost comes as standard. But take it from me; there is nothing more unappealing than a workmanlike ----- from someone who sees it as contractual obligation. Not sexy at all, ladies… Read: Oral Sex: Love It or Hate It? 

2. Your mouth can do a million things your vagina can't.

So make use of it. There's far more to fellatio than sucking, and seeing as his genitals are in your mouth, you are the one who is completely dictating the terms. Enthusiastic head-bobbing one minute, followed by slithering your tongue down his shaft, followed by smoochy kisses around the head…it's all good.

3. Deep-throating isn't everything.

Being able to shove a foot-long hot dog into your mouth at a baseball game might get you on the Jumbotron for a few seconds, but if that's the sum total of your oral technique, you need to expand your repertoire. It gets pretty boring after a couple of minutes—and to be honest, we start worrying about your gag reflex kicking in and your jaws snapping shut.

4. Oral familiarity breeds genital disinterest.

In other words, mix up your technique. There's nothing worse than being with someone who does the same things for the same amount of time in the same order. Surprise us! 

5. Get to know his penis… 

…because it's more than a bit of meat, y'know. Yes, there's loads of nerve endings round the tip, but quite a few elsewhere. We'd like those stimulated too, please. And please don't forget the balls—gently rubbing them or cupping them in your hand and feeling the weight of them increases the sensations tenfold.

Want to know 5 more oral sex tips from men? Check out the rest of this article at YourTango.com.

Written by Al Needham for YourTango.com.

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Comments 11-20 of 54
  • opiniononly's Avatar
    Posted by opiniononly Thu Jul 9, 2009 3:05pm PDT

    Most women have experienced the "that's not my clitoris and will never be my clitoris" adventure with some inexperienced/inept partner, so it's okay in my mind for a guy to weigh in with his perspective. Love ----- and watching/feeling the pleasure it gives my beloved SO...and since he knows exactly what he is doing when he dives, we just wallow and swallow and enjoy all we give to each other. Gotta go find him......

    Report Abuse
  • MrsKlingonPasadena's Avatar
    Posted by MrsKlingonPasadena Thu Jul 9, 2009 3:36pm PDT

    Crazy Doug: My ex-boyfriend didn't like it. I think out of a 4 year relationship he only let me do it 3 times or so.

    Report Abuse
  • jenny's Avatar
    Posted by jenny Thu Jul 9, 2009 9:33pm PDT

    Crazy Doug- I was once seeing a guy for over a year that didn't like giving or receiving oral sex. I thought he was the only guy who didn't like it, lol! It's all personal preference I guess.

    Report Abuse
  • CHINEDU's Avatar
    Posted by CHINEDU Fri Jul 10, 2009 7:34am PDT

    How do we know original condom

    Report Abuse
  • 's Avatar
    Posted by Fri Jul 10, 2009 11:13am PDT

    Everything seems to be about ----- s to some people.

    I don't like giving oral.

    I want an article which will show how we as a couple can pleasure each other in ways we both may like.

    Report Abuse
  • Erika's Avatar
    Posted by Erika Fri Jul 10, 2009 11:39am PDT

    so dudes ONLY like getting head? lame.

    Report Abuse
  • Rebecca G's Avatar
    Posted by Rebecca G Fri Jul 10, 2009 2:13pm PDT

    More like 5 fellatio tips. I learned by watching porn stars do it. Lots of practice and I love the power and control I get from doing it. The key is open communication, tell her what you like best and encourage her to do it.

    Report Abuse
  • toria's Avatar
    Posted by toria Fri Jul 10, 2009 6:56pm PDT

    um, EW?!?! just because this will please guys dusnt mean it will please us women.

    Report Abuse
  • Sesame seed's Avatar
    Posted by Sesame seed Fri Jul 10, 2009 7:08pm PDT

    What else is there to say. Pathetic.

    Report Abuse
  • Sean S's Avatar
    Posted by Sean S Sat Jul 11, 2009 8:48am PDT

    Flame-n-heather your and idiot, sex goes both ways and my wife likes to give a BJ and I like to orally please her. Why are you so high and mighty to tell us we are lucky??? Do you ever wonder why you are alone? We whine about our penises because it is our favorite thing, some women whine about there vaginas. Quite with the holding sex over a guys head and maybe someone will eventually like you, I doubt it but just maybe.

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