Love + Sex

Monday, October 6, 2008

6 things that scare your man

Getty Images

Getty Images


A lot of guys try to give the impression that they're calm and cool, that they can handle the pressure, that they think worrying is for wimps.

And the sad part is, the women in their lives sometimes buy this act, or even encourage it. Heck, if he isn't worried, they can feel calmer, too. Maybe you buy the act because the only time you see emotion in your man is when he's watching his favorite baseball team fall apart at the end of a game.

Or maybe it's because the only time you've seen him sweat was when he had to wear a suit to an August wedding. Or maybe it's because the last time you asked him, "Aren't you worried?" he responded with a dismissive, "Nah."

While men pretend that they're wired with steel cable, not nerves, they have their shakedown moments, too. Here are some of the biggest worries that can weigh on a guy's mind.

That He's Going to Lose His Hair

Yes, I know it seems surface-level to worry about such a vanity issue as baldness, but lots of guys equate follicle failure as a failure in masculinity, as well. Oh, we know it's not true - that hair loss has nothing to do with how funny, smart, or good a guy is. But knowing is a heck of a lot different than feeling. Pluck a lion's mane sometime, and see if he purrs.

That He's Going Broke

Economic shocks (like the one we're in right now) worry guys for lots of reasons: Your man probably feels like one of his largest charges in life is to be able to provide comfortably for his family. While money and job problems have their own tangible effects, they can also undermine the way he sees himself as a man. So if he's a little freaky around the checkbook, it's because his bank balance is closely tied to his emotional balance. A simple four-step plan for your savings like this one can ease his fears.

That He'll Have One Cheeseburger Too Many

Millions and millions of guys worry about their health - more, of course, as they get older. The one killer that really makes us think: the heart attack. One minute you're watching Simpsons reruns; the next minute you're staring at the ceiling of an ambulance. Because we've read too many stories or known too many people who checked out earlier than they should have, the threat is always lingering - in our bodies as well as our minds. Take these 20 small steps toward a healthier life.

That He'll be Called Out in Public

Some of us are thick-skinned when it comes to taking criticism from bosses, spouses, and every other kind of critic. And some of us have skin thinner than a Spring Break T-shirt. But none of us like getting called out or picked on in front of a crowd. It's not that we can't take the criticism, or can't think of a comeback, or can't accept the fact that we're imperfect. It's that public attack forces us to counter-attack or retreat - both of which have their downsides.

That His Kid Won't Make the Free Throw

Granted, a guy is going to worry a heck of a lot more about the big things when it comes to parenting - that junior wears a helmet when he rides his skateboard, that he does well in school, and that he thinks drugs are for losers.

But want to see a guy's heart pump? Put his kid on the field, court, or dance floor. He's pulling hard for his gene-carrier to do well - not because he wants to live vicariously through him or her (as most people assume), but because he wants to see the smiles and the fist pumps. It's because his happiness is directly correlated to theirs.

That He'll Fail to Perform in the Clutch

When a man can't rise to the occasion he feels about as useful as a '63 Oldsmobile with rusted spark plugs. But before you put him up on blocks, reassure him that more than 1 in 10 will have trouble with erectile dysfunction at some point in their lives, and the other 9 guys out of 10 have good reason to be concerned as well.

As part of our research for the new book "Eat This, Not That!," my coauthor Matt Goulding and I undercovered evidence that the American diet is slowing our sex lives (for both men and women) to a crawl. You can find out why that's happening and discover the best and worst sex foods.

And check out this fantastic list of the very best beverages for quick and easy weight loss!

Have other insights into male fears? Please share them here.

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2008 Men's Health. All Rights Reserved.
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From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 121
  • cherylrocks's Avatar
    Posted by cherylrocks Wed Aug 6, 2008 12:12am PDT

    I think men get a bad deal when it comes to having to act cool and strong when he has doubts. Us women, give birth usually between the ages of 20-30 years old so we figure out a lot sooner at a younger age that our bodies are never going to be as youthful ever again. A man may start going bald when hes in his late 40, this is the first sign to him that he isnt going to be youthful anymore. We women, already retire to the fact that we are never going to have the perfect body, where men don't get this realization until they are actually getting quite old. Men don't have to gain weight because their bodies are not going through changes as women go through child birth, change of life and getting old. Men just wake up one day and discover they are old, their hair is thinner, they are not as physically strong as they use to be and it can be harder on them because by then they have no recourse. **I remember after having my twins at the age of eighteen, I had never had a stretch mark in my life and bam I had them on my legs, my stomach and my breast**

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  • 2centsricher's Avatar
    Posted by 2centsricher Wed Aug 6, 2008 8:49am PDT

    The economic worries for men aren't just about not making enough, it's also now about how much they are making in comparison to their spouse. Women's salaries are getting higher, as are our numbers in typically male workplaces. It can be really scary when you have a cultural history of dudes making more money than women, and all of a sudden your uber-successful wife is the one wh's really bringing home the bacon.

    Report Abuse
  • Daddy's Girl's Avatar
    Posted by Daddy's Girl Wed Aug 6, 2008 9:25am PDT

    The problem is guys...you think you have to be all big and bad ALL the time. Us women like to see the softer side of their man once in a while. It's also ok if we're the one bringing in more income than you. I know it doesn't make you feel as big and bad but...it's fine. Trust me. Heck! I'm going to be a Veterinarian. The chances are that my husband won't make more money than me cause vets make really good money. And he's just going to have to live with it cause I'm going to follow my dream no matter what.

    I hope you guys can see our side of the story as well. And not depress yourself so much over that kind of thing.

    ~Daddy's Girl

    Report Abuse
  • shawnmeboy86's Avatar
    Posted by shawnmeboy86 Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:19pm PDT

    gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

    Report Abuse
  • livingston county's Avatar
    Posted by livingston county Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:22pm PDT

    Do NOT knock the great Oldsmobile! Especially a '63! 60's era GM's were the golden age of automobiles. Rusted spark plugs would not effect an Oldsmobile motor. You've mistaken Olds for crap called Ford or Chrysler because everything goes wrong with those crappy brands. Get your cars right, David.

    Report Abuse
  • Unpleased Former Customer's Avatar
    Posted by Unpleased Former Customer Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:23pm PDT

    These are superficial crap, probably written by some moron raised by MTV. Come on, people, there is a whole lot more important things than this.

    Report Abuse
  • Richard's Avatar
    Posted by Richard Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:28pm PDT

    Well as for most AZN mom, they will scare to dead if you get like a C or below in your report card.

    Report Abuse
  • john d's Avatar
    Posted by john d Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:31pm PDT

    Are you guys joking me. Is this the best you can come up with. please all these top 10 fears for men, is such bs

    Report Abuse
  • theking2202004's Avatar
    Posted by theking2202004 Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:35pm PDT

    i wanna talk to the idiots who write these stupid articles. they probaly think that they have the most important job in the world. retards

    Report Abuse
  • jlee2027's Avatar
    Posted by jlee2027 Wed Aug 6, 2008 4:36pm PDT

    Completely gay article by the Yahoo feministas

    We would gladly give our lives for children or the woman we love, but instead the perverts of the world want to know what makes us afraid. Why is this important? Do you not already understand us? We stand for truth, justice, and freedom. We are the leaders, inventors, and protectors of all you see. To those that stand against such things we seek out and destroy them. Our ambition is endless, it is not fear, it is the fear of not achieving. For you, and for ourselves.Yes, a few of us are rotten apples, such is life. We want to be understand, respected, and accepted for what we are, and we are not some creature you can label, change as you desire, play games with or manipulate.

    So ladies, stop whining. We aren't going anywhere, and neither are we changing just to make you happy.

    Report Abuse
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