Love + Sex

Sunday, December 6, 2009

7 Traits Of Irresistible Men

We're not going to lie. A man boasting abs chiseled to perfection and biceps that pop just enough when flexed (without shredding shirts He-Man style) will no-doubt turn our heads. And even if caught mid check-him-out glance, we're not about to look away. Fit, toned bodies are the result of hard work and dedication to a healthy lifestyle. We certainly pay homage to that. But for a man to achieve a skyrocketing score on the sexiness scale there's got to be more to him than physical assets. Throw in these seven traits and he's guaranteed irresistible.

1. He Has Mastered The Wink. We don't know how they learn the technique but some guys really have the Richard-Gere wink down pat. There's an art to this wink and getting it right can be tricky. It's more suave and smoky than cheeky and laughable. He's comfortable giving this signal and has the timing to the tee. Done right, this move is pure sexy. Caveat: The wink can be tricky to pull off. Practice first.

2. He Radiates Calm. It's sending shivers up our spine just thinking about how powerful a man's calm presence can be. Neurotic or hyper or frenzied is stressful, no matter how busy the man or what his excuse. But if he's got cool written all over his face and his gaze is pure steady and peaceful his sex appeal will shoot through the roof (think old-school James Dean). We women can unwillingly fall into the trap of over-worrying about things we can't control. A man who sets us at ease by reminding us how things always manage to work out in the end is absolutely hot. Read: 3 Secrets To Exuding Sexy

3. He Takes Care Of Himself. Look, we're not saying it's a certain height or build that matters. If he keeps his body in relatively good shape this shows us he knows how to take care of himself. It also clues us in that he sets health as a priority. What's more, if he's active, working out even a few times a week, the endorphins his body is producing during gym sessions are sure to keep him in good spirits and energized. The bottom line: If he takes good care of himself he's likely to take good care of his partner (or at least help keep her motivated to do so). That's a turn-on. Read: Play Together: Top Sports For Couples

4. He's Got Style. We don't want to give the wrong idea here. This is not to say he has to be one certain type of style, and that mimicking a prescribed "it" style is a surefire path to sexy (whether that's clean-cut, tattooed-up or punked-out). Not at all. Rather, what's attractive in a guy is that he has a style at all, a way of dressing that reflects in some way who he is and what he's into. A guy who wakes up hum-drum and throws the same dingy shirt and pair of jeans on every day? Not sexy. At all. 

5. He Has A Manly Scent. Sounds so animalistic, we know. No man can control his natural scent, and it turns out our DNA compatibility dictates who smells good to us, anyway. But, every guy can augment his essence with a spritz (one will do just fine) of cologne. As long as it's not overdone, a man with a strong scent has the potential to drive women wild.

6. He Is Affectionate. Though we women try not to let on, affection (be it an arm around the shoulder or hand on the leg) lights us up like fireflies. Consider it your secret weapon. By affection, we do mean to include expressing your feelings through words, such as "I love you." It's amazing how many hot men fall short of sexy just for lack of articulating and showing their love. Let's put it this way: There are guys who reach out to their partner while driving, and there are guys who keep both hands on the wheel and eyes straight ahead. The lads of the former group qualify for sexy.

7. He Laughs Loud, Hard, Often. No news flash here. Comedy is highly enticing. It's worth noting though that there are different types of humor. The insecure comedy that's based on putting others down or calling them names doesn't gibe with us. But give us fun-loving, belly-jiggling jokes and laughter and you'll head straight to the top of the sexiness charts.

Readers, do you need advice on a relationship issue? Ask our community and receive smart, real responses from people who've been there too.


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Written by Julie D. Andrews for YourTango.com.

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From the Community…

Comments 1-10 of 252
  • gracious432003's Avatar
    Posted by gracious432003 Fri Jul 24, 2009 9:24am PDT

    The wink--not so much

    The calm--ooooh yeah!

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  • Hollywood's Avatar
    Posted by Hollywood Fri Jul 24, 2009 9:50am PDT

    scent is def. true. it amazes me how the human body works. i love my boyfriends scent, and the faint smell of his body spray ;)

    oh and the laughing part...priceless...ive never laughed with a boyfriend as much as i do now. I love it, especially when he laughs at me, it makes me happy haha.

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  • Heidi's Avatar
    Posted by Heidi Fri Jul 24, 2009 10:01am PDT

    I have never seen anyone mention the calm as a reason a man is sexy, but it's so true! I think I might have had a couple (dozen) nervous breakdowns over the past several years if my husband wasn't the calmest guy in the world.

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  • KittyKat's Avatar
    Posted by KittyKat Fri Jul 24, 2009 10:24am PDT

    I like the driving part. My man always holds my hand while driving. Looks at me once in a while, keeps good conversation sometimes.

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  • LadyJane's Avatar
    Posted by LadyJane Fri Jul 24, 2009 10:27am PDT

    Calm factor and Sense of Humor very very sexy! And for me personally a music buff of differing genres!

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  • TJ S's Avatar
    Posted by TJ S Fri Jul 24, 2009 10:32am PDT

    So, one question. At one point or another I've done or been all of the above (except the winking thing, that looks and feels stupid but maybe it's because of the exotic look of my eyes and face).

    My question is about number 6. I've shown affection and you are right, women try to not let it show but WHY????? We're doing it to purvey to you what we're feeling and you "don't let on"? Does that really make sense? That makes me NOT want to do it anymore if you're going to treat it arbitrarily or not react at all. If a guy does something affectionate and you treat it like nothing, don't be amazed when he acts differently or stops showing you any affection at all. One of you knowledgeable ladies please clue me in because I'm baffled...and yet, still will be affectionate because that's just me.

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  • AmandaC's Avatar
    Posted by AmandaC Fri Jul 24, 2009 11:41am PDT

    oooh yeah the calm factor.. would you say that's kinda like Confidence? Confidence is super hot. Or maybe it's just that my guy has broad shoulders, and stands straight and tall and just exudes cofidence, manliness and sexiness. (he's mine go get your own) :p LOL...

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  • Doktor Eevol's Avatar
    Posted by Doktor Eevol Fri Jul 24, 2009 7:44pm PDT

    Winks are corny and BO is completely overrated. I'm sick of the idea that men should be allowed to be stinky because it's some genetic/dna/pheromone thing while women are told to douche and NEVER smell... ever. Such a disgusting, Victorian double standard.

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  • Billy Z's Avatar
    Posted by Billy Z Fri Jul 24, 2009 8:05pm PDT

    Here's my question to you...ok, if guy is so hot...why is he single? I'll tell you why...because he is broken! Broken boy is always "looking" and never finding because he will never settle...he will go around using people and loving things as long as he can get away with it. He will never mature, always be a big baby and, maybe take care of himself, but really, if he is alone and looking hot, he is a red flag guy...he is broken...maybe perv/sex addict, maybe into bad things, maybe a thief or con artist.... No, anyone that thinks they are "getting" Hot-Boy is probably just high... Dream on, but really, why waste your time with fantasy and pointless speculation...? I prefer to focus on what's real...and even if you work out right next to the guy at the gym everyday, did you ever think maybe he's gay? He probably is...or married, or dripping with women hanging off his d!ck that he discards like yesterday's toilet paper... You want stupid living, follow the advice in this blog...you want to get smart, think for yourself...open your eyes...

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  • sauce's Avatar
    Posted by sauce Fri Jul 24, 2009 8:39pm PDT

    ummm Marie Montaine 22, i cant believe you would rant and jump to such a conclusion! that either he's a sex addict, gay or a player? maybe there are such hot guys out there single, because more women think like you do, or maybe, just like women, they're just intimidating to us. How would you feel if you were an attractive single woman (which you might be, i dont know you) with all the qualities equivalent to whats stated here for men, and instead of being told yea thats sexy, every man said something like, no if she's hot, funny, and smells good, she must be a b*tch or a wh*re, if she's single somethin is wrong with her, she's probably crazy. to say something like that, and then to state "get smart and think for yourself" is completely contradicting.

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