Love + Sex

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  Posted by Chelle79 Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:25pm PDT

  I am going through the very same thing..My problem is that I may not be ever able to forgive or even forget. All men don't cheat! You have to be true to urself. You deserve the best.....

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  Posted by hay may Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:26pm PDT

  As the daughter of a father that cheated on my mom last year, I say that you should stay if you still love him. Please just try to fix your relationship. That's all I can say. My mom is so forgiving and loving and she and my family have forgiven my dad and are trying to move on. I can tell you that since this happened my parents' relationship is extremely raw and honest. Love is worth it.

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  Posted by prinmancz Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:28pm PDT

  Yes! That is not true. For many, once a cheater, never again, because they almost lost the best thing they ever had...YOU!

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  Posted by Turtle Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:28pm PDT

  I dont believe your stagering number! I was married twice before and both ex's cheated that is why I divorced. I am now married again and it has not happened yet! And I honestly dont believe it ever will! Now just using myself, that is 66percent. I know people that have been married for many many years, that have had no cheating. That drops the percentage rate. I also know people that have so that raised the percentage. I would estimate 50-60 percent cheat. That being said, look at the divorce rate...50-60 percent. These are just my estimates but in any event, keep looking there has to be someone out there just for your, I know I have found mine!!!

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  Posted by Loon-A-TiK Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:29pm PDT

  this is so sad. i'm so sorry to hear that your husband cheated.

  what is his excuse?

  i'd try marriage counseling first. maybe there are underlying problems that can be resolved, and this infidelity can make your marriage stronger.

  most men are just horn-dogs and will take it where they can. you need to make sure your man recognizes the prize he has, and that is you, and that he would never do anything to endanger his relationship with you, especially cheating on you.

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  Posted by Barbara Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:35pm PDT

  As a former cheater in a relationship with a former cheater (who I trust completely), I believe that cheating is a symptom of a problem in a relationship, not a personality trait. Yes, if you are predisposed to being undisciplined and not setting boundaries for yourself, you're more likely to cheat. But if you feel like your needs are truly being met, you won't look outside the relationship for what's missing. Often it's because someone has sort of an emotionally immature need for validation -- to feel desired. So if you and your husband can identify and communicate what you need from each other and from the relationship -- and are willing to give it -- you might be able to work it out.

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  Posted by SWEETHEART Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:42pm PDT

  you can give a try so you will know what is real and what is not, if you just reading what we say we might give you the wrong decision. give him another chance then if he did it again from there you can't blame your self to divorce him. some people do work to give another chance, but some people don't, sorry, but i'm 8 years divorce now and no regret at all, i achieved everything i want in my life. i just bought me a 1980 years old home and that price for me as a divorce person from a cheating husband. now hes married with 3 children and i'm still single. life is very simple make a right or wrong decision is always a challenge.

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  Posted by blackbelt Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:43pm PDT

  I used to run jack hammers and heard this conversation between two 40 year old men. "hay did you hear that Jack cheated on his wife, and that may end their marriage?" The other man responded " yeah, but cheating has kept a lot of marriages from ending" That is excatly the conversation. Has cheating ever kept a (loveless or sexless) marriage together?

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  Posted by vickantre Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:44pm PDT

  A relationship is base on how much trust their is. If you can't trust him again you're better off alone. People cheat for different reasons. What was your partners reason? You will be the judge if that reason or excuse is valid. You make your own decision because what ever you decide to do you will have to live with that.

  Personal opinion, the rules and expectations should be set first hand before marriage. My hunsband and I have talked about cheatting. He's never cheatted on me (that I know of). But I have warned him that his chance started the minute we got married. I don't believe in second chances.

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  Posted by Chelle79 Wed Jun 11, 2008 3:48pm PDT

  After the cheating has happened and all the hurt is there how can you look at it as "Ok you did that becasue there was a problem" a mature person addresses that it is a problem...Cheating on your wife or husband is not an answer to the problem it only makes it worse because the trust is gone. Cheating is never an option!!

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