Love + Sex

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Are men REALLY that bad?

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Ok. I have been thinking about the last few weeks of conversations with some friends of mine both offline and online. It seems that the permeating thought about women-vs-men is that men just don't have a clue what women go through. I myself have a HUGE issue with that! For one, I was raised by my mother, her mother and anyone that has had a really big impact on my life...was a female.

So when women start to complain about the male chauvinist point of view so many men carry, is this a preconceived or prejudiced idea? Or fact based on your experience? Let's give an example.

1.Women talk about not being good at parenting because of blah, blah, blah...I challenge that because I raised my two nieces in a better fashion than most women would their own children.

2. Many women tell me I have no idea how to tap into their emotional make-up only to have them pouring their hearts out to me within 15 mins of talking.

3. When it comes to sex, many women have said they've never been brought to orgasm because every guy they've been with was in it for himself only to see I was only about making sure she was pleasured first and for me to bring them to orgasm...almost too embarrassed to even admit how good the sex was because of how bad they mouthed about it previously.

4, When going out with someone and a conversation comes up that strikes a personal chord, do you take offense because he says something that was a generalization, i.e. "I like women with meat on their bones personally...". "I don't like women who wear a lot of make-up, makes me feel she has something to hide.". "Why do women always do stuff like that? It really irks me when they do.".

5. Do you think a guy is trying to hook up with you just because he asks you out or calls you "boo", "wifey", "sexy", "gorgeous" or some other compliment far too many women think are reserved for couples?

Things like this have lead me to believe far too many women have the wrong idea of men in general. Are we REALLY that bad that even online, a comment sets you ablaze before you understand the male perspective? Or in person? Do you meet someone with a preconcieved notion from what you read, hear or feed your mind on? Are men REALLY that bad? Ever tried wrapping us all up and jetting us to Mars if we are? I'd like to know what YOU think.
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Comments 1-10 of 51
  • jolie's Avatar
    Posted by jolie Tue Jul 15, 2008 2:31pm PDT

    i like u CB 29, stuff that you said are true. i know not all men are bad maybe with some women with bad experience like me happens to feel that way coz we always feel that we cannot trust guys anymore but personally, i still do , i just got fear coz of experience that my heart is still bleeding. very well said.

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  • Mommy's Avatar
    Posted by Mommy Tue Jul 15, 2008 3:00pm PDT

    As my husband alsways says,"If I talked about women the way the talk about men I'd be fired so fast it'd make your head spin."No,men aren't really that bad and if you switch the word man to any other group you'd be in a hell of a lot of trouble.Its sexism at its finest.

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  • Jb's Avatar
    Posted by Jb Tue Jul 15, 2008 3:41pm PDT

    I think both women and men are equally as bad it's just that women talk about it more so it just seems that men are worse.

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  • Renette's Avatar
    Posted by Renette Tue Jul 15, 2008 3:47pm PDT

    No all men are not that bad, and yes some girls are... but you have to look into the pool of people you are asking or where you are geting your answers... are they the girls with all the make up and the ones only into themssleves. And you have to be a little more selective in who your sexual partners are i guess higher your standards man and you will find out that all women are not the same just as all men are not.

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  • Beth's Avatar
    Posted by Beth Tue Jul 15, 2008 3:56pm PDT

    No men aren't bad. I love them, and women. I think it's more of just humans in general drive eachother crazy lol. Because if you get all women working together in one office....all hell will break loose lol.

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  • 's Avatar
    Posted by Tue Jul 15, 2008 4:04pm PDT

    Hello! My name is Lenetta, and I being a 38 year old woman, agree with the fact that a lot of women read too much into what a man says. I have a male friend who I talk to almost every day. He is always calling me sexy momma, and telling me that he thinks about me all of the time. LOL I just take it this way. He is full of sugar( sweet talk), and I am probably not the only one that he is talking to that way. I have learnd never to put my energy into a man untill he makes a proven commitment to me. He is just a friend unless the feeling to go to the next level has come to a mutual agreement. I feel that women get hurt when they start doing all of this dreaming on how things can be and they set their minds to make it happen and unfortunatley the man has no knowledge of it lol. So I think we as women need to slow down and be careful who we put our energy in. It will be less bitterness and negative thinking when it comes to men. as for the sex part. lol I don't think that all men are out for themselves, I think that most of them just really don't know how to give a women an org. They think that it's their size and how they use their tool. I think that we women are part the blame, because we have done all of this faking like we're having one, so they wont feel bad, lol instead of just telling men and teaching them about our bodies. I litterally told a man what to do. He was open, so I told him what to do step by step and he got it. It's not that hard. Thank you for allowing me to comment.

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  • chrisfits's Avatar
    Posted by chrisfits Tue Jul 15, 2008 4:14pm PDT

    I like this blog! It is down to earth, and very well said. I don't think all men are bad. As a man, I think that it is the bad ones that get all the spot lights! There are plenty of good guys in the world... I'm just one of many...I'm sure!

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  • 's Avatar
    Posted by Tue Jul 15, 2008 4:17pm PDT

    Good stuff and right on the money.... Men raised in single family home by their mother, sisters,aunties, and grandma's are definately intune with womens feelings. These days I blame women for alot of the pain they bring on themselves especially when they actually no better.

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  • bluesky's Avatar
    Posted by bluesky Tue Jul 15, 2008 4:27pm PDT

    personally I don't believe man are bad sometimes we don't understand each other. but that does not make nobody be bad. somethime women say man are bad coz they get hurt I get hurt coz this guy can love me the same way i love him, but really love is there or not you can't forse nobody to love you. this go for guys 2 most of the time is the lack of communication. In this world we all are the same men and women both can be bad or good according to they chooses

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  • secret's Avatar
    Posted by secret Tue Jul 15, 2008 5:30pm PDT

    I would have to say that you seem to have a really good perception of woman in general. I have to say that because of some experiences that I have had with some really terrible men I am leary of men when I first meet them. I do not however hold a prejudice against all men because of my experiences. I like to meet men who prove the general bias of men wrong. Its unfortunate that it sometimes seems that those men are hard to find. I also have to say that are just as many coniving and inconsiderate woman out there that have caused some men to have a bias opinion on woman as well.

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