Love + Sex

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Can You Beat This Worst Date Story?

JackDan

http://www.fotolog.com/glammerboy

Hearing lore of dating disasters past makes me realize that I am, while stupid and ignorant, not a freak. Conversely, for those of you who read these tales, it helps remember that you are not the only one who has to put up with awful and psychotic guys. So, I share as many as I can with you.

My friend recently went out with a guy she met on Match.com. I'm alarmed at the number of hell dates I've heard from friends who have tried Match.com. I guess it's still pretty random-you can only get so much from a person's "profile".

In the advertising world, they say peer-to-peer recommendation is "the holy grail". With online dating, you don't have a mutual friend bridging that gap recommending a friend to you. It's a random crapshoot. And sometimes it can lead to events like this...

My friend Carrie met a guy named Robert on Match.com and the two went out on what started out as a normal, delightful date. Again, like my friend Margaret's foosball fiasco, distance played a role here. Robert stretched the truth slightly telling Carrie he lived in the Upper East Side. Turns out he lived in Harlem (at least another 1/2 hour from her place in Hoboken, NJ), so there was no way she was going to do the late night trip back to Hoboken-- a commute that would last over 45 minutes.

When they got to Robert's apartment, they were having some wine and discussing regular topics while sitting on the couch, when suddenly Robert flipped out about his career. He got up, paced about the room and muttered to himself about his career failures. Carrie, creeped out by his sudden shift in behavior, decided to turn in for the night, went to bed and pretended to sleep.

Once Robert thought Carrie was asleep, he downed a handle of Jack Daniels while his ranting grew more and more disturbing. Carrie tried to calm him down and urged him to come to bed and go to sleep which he finally agreed to do. But Robert was too disturbed to sleep. He got up again and went back to his Jack Daniels, downing shots of it this time.

Carrie was finally freaked out completely, but Hoboken seemed so far away. It represented safety and sanity, but it was coming up on 2AM, so she decided to do her best to sleep and deal with the trip in the morning-scary how many women feel the need to either pretend they are asleep, or try to fall asleep on dates gone awry.

But Carrie would be distracted by something else before she was able to fall asleep. After things had finally quieted down, she noticed a strange sound coming from the corner of the bedroom. She got up and saw Robert in the corner of the room where all of her stuff was sitting on the floor, peeing on it.

I must say that Carrie showed a lot of patience throughout the evening, putting up with Robert's career ranting, alcoholic outbursts, and generaly freakishness, but this was the last straw. Finally, Carrie made her way home to Hoboken at 2AM, clutching her urine-stained belongings.

I'm thinking I need to take a girl home who lives far away from my apartment. The weirdest thing I might say when a girl comes home with me would be along the lines of: "listen to this song; it tears me down and then builds me back up again." A bit dramatic, but not psycho. And, even so, it seems like women get more patient when they are far away from their own place because the late night commute is a pain.

Funny thing is, guys don't realize how awful they are. While Robert did call after the date (mostly to apologize), he continued to ask Carrie out for drinks. Did he not remember what he had done? And, did he not realize that "drinks" would lead to him possibly urinating on her purse and belongings?

Have you had many nightmare dates resulting from online dating services? And what's the worst thing a guy has ever done on a date that he ignored by trying to ask you out again? Was it any worse than relieving themselves on your belongings?

TELL US YOUR WORST DATE STORY


Posted by Rich


Related from Marie Claire:

How to Spot Your Soul Mate
Diary of a Hook Up From heck
5 Ways You're Sabotaging Your Relationship
50 Cheap Date Ideas
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From the Community…

Comments 11-20 of 29
  • LenaA's Avatar
    Posted by LenaA Tue Jun 30, 2009 7:31am PDT

    i am with the other ladies why would she spend the night at some guys house she literally just met....thats scary!

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  • nicole's Avatar
    Posted by nicole Tue Jun 30, 2009 7:49am PDT

    okay you sooooo need to tell your friend to stop staying at the guys house. What is wrong with her first of all my rule is if there is going to be an after dinner night cape it happens at my house that way I have the upper hand. There are some real crazy people out there and it seems like your friend is just begging for it to come and get her

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  • Certponte3's Avatar
    Posted by Certponte3 Tue Jun 30, 2009 8:52am PDT

    I would never ever ever go to a strangers house on a first or second date!!!! A first date at his apartment OVERNIGHT!?!! WOW. Havnt they heard of the craiglist killer. thats crazy. Online dating is great-but you need to be CAREFUL!

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  • Rowdygirl's Avatar
    Posted by Rowdygirl Tue Jun 30, 2009 9:31am PDT

    I have to agree that the guy was a freak, but your friend has MAJOR issues. Going to his house is one thing, but trying to talk yourself into going to SLEEP in order to ignore his psycho behavior is just ridiculous. Didn't she consider that maybe he could really freak out and rape or kill her? Or did he go into his breakdown AFTER they already had sex?

    She needs to address why she would even consider staying in the same apt. with someone on the edge instead of running for home base.

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  • Melissa's Avatar
    Posted by Melissa Tue Jun 30, 2009 9:35am PDT

    Rachel, maybe before you go calling poeple morons, you should learn how to spell it, huh? Your argument doesn't hold much water when you seem to be a moron yourself. Just sayin'...

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  • Melissa's Avatar
    Posted by Melissa Tue Jun 30, 2009 9:38am PDT

    *people... "hello kettle? this is pot. you're black." :P

    Report Abuse
  • Nine's Avatar
    Posted by Nine Tue Jun 30, 2009 11:42am PDT

    I am totally unimpressed as far as the story goes. Guy was a freak. I am, however, completely impressed by your friend's level of stupidity and propensity to stay in a potentially dangerous situation because she was too lazy to drive home!

    With a freak ranting in the other room and peeing on her stuff it is not like restful sleep was likely to happen anyways.

    Idiot.

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  • Nine's Avatar
    Posted by Nine Tue Jun 30, 2009 11:48am PDT

    BTW: just at a glance the majority of the responses are about your friend's behavior...do her a favor and let her read the comments...maybe she'll live longer and quit getting her things peed on.

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  • Tracy's Avatar
    Posted by Tracy Tue Jun 30, 2009 12:44pm PDT

    Agree - why the heck would your friends go to strangers' apartments without knowing them? Sheesh! It's called "meeting in the middle." 45 minutes home is not THAT long of a commute to get out of a weird situation. Heck, I've had GREAT early dates with my now current boyfriend and I still took the 45-minute drive home from his place until I knew him better.

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  • Lizbeth's Avatar
    Posted by Lizbeth Tue Jun 30, 2009 3:12pm PDT

    OMG, that's horrifying! Who sleeps over at a stranger's house?? (well...I guess we've all had our monets, but yikes!)

    A co-worker of mine met a man on Match and when he showed up for their date after a few months of sincere chatting and flirting. He was a little person; a small detail he had failed to mention during all their cyber-time together (and phone calls). She was so alarmed by his omission, and his unexpected stature, that she had trouble trusting him as the night went on. Knowing that she was a therapist, she kept wondering why he had chosen not to include this fact about himself, esp. considering that they had lengthy conversations about body image acceptance as they got older.

    Anyway. It was a funny story and there was no second date. :)

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Comments 11-20 of 29

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