Coping With Divorce

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  Posted by Tyrone Mon Jul 6, 2009 10:58pm PDT

  I'm a 32 yr. old man who is just recently divorced,and i too find it hard to begin again.Although my 2 children are with me- the life that once was "figured out "is now in confusion ,and doubt.Where do i begin to pick up those pieces that used to hold me together??I find myself asking these quetions many times over ,and the same answer rings in my head"let "God"lead your heart ,and time heal the pain .The hurt will suside ,and your heart will learn to love again.

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  Posted by Tuulai Tue Jul 7, 2009 2:15am PDT

  what should i do if I am 15 years older than my partner, who is a father of my daughter aged one year old? There always exists a complain between us since our daughter was born. I don't agree with him when he gives all responsible for our daughter. Even he thinks that I am responsible to make a money. Therefore I decided to divorce from him. Now he is 23 years old. The one thing is he lied me that he is 30.

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  Posted by Peace Tue Jul 7, 2009 6:18am PDT

  Starting over is very hard yet I think it's a test from God. Relationships fail and you sometimes have to cope with the unknown it's super hard in the beginning but like she said time will heal the pain it's just sometimes it's take longer depending on the individual. But the longer it takes the better the results might be. And if it's really easy to cope with the question stands was it really love so it's only right to mope around for at least a little while. J.L

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  Posted by LAH Tue Jul 7, 2009 6:22am PDT

  Coping with the divorce,yes after 22yrs it just crayz 2 me 2 b starting over again,4 some reason u still carry yourself like ur married,which can b a blessing or curse,my children r 22 and 20,and i dont know if it better 2 leave when the children r young or old looks and feel like the same results,4 me this is hard,all the tears,all the pain it's going on 2 yrs soon, and i STILL can't stand him,i pray 4 my heart 2 b free of this with time i know it will,i just started dating again,i have a small carry on bag,not a suitcase:} but it's new and fresh it's scary because of the unsure the unknown.it is my responsibility 2 TRUST IN GOD.!!!! one thing i do know is that this man keeps me laughing all the time,when i want 2 run 2 a dark place in my mind,4 some reason he know and pulls me back 2 a positive place of laugher, i love him 4 that.ONE DAY AT A TIME, GOD FRIST!!! PEACE

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  Posted by william Wed Jul 8, 2009 11:56pm PDT

  why is it that women generally divorce the man i never got that

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  Posted by vmj Sun Jul 12, 2009 4:22pm PDT

  I'm 5 years post divorce after a 28 year marriage. It was one baby step at a time. For 4 1/2 years I hated him for what he did to me. Betrayed me. But, many things have happend along the way to help me understand why God let this happen to me. First of all I do believe that God has a plan and what he has in store for me is much better than the marriage that was taken away. Recently, I realized that I was beginning to feel sorry for my ex. He was diagnosed with prostate cancer shortly after he married the person he had the affair with. Wow! Was that God talking to me or what!!!!???? You just don't break one of the ten commandments without God telling you about it. He now has to go through his new marriage with urinary and bowel problems on top of having to take Viagra every time he would like to have sex. Imagine that with a new wife even if she is 14 years his junior. I feel sorry for him. One of my friends told me that when you start to feel sorry for your ex you are pretty much to the "healed" place in life. I think she was right. It's been very hard trying to figure out my way. My one and only son married the same year as my divorce and has moved out of State. I felt like I lost my whole family. It was the hardest thing I have ever endured. But, I think I have come out the other side a smarter, better person. I definitely have a stronger faith in God which is always a good thing. I trust he will take care of me and bring me to another person who is a good person and I will finally experience what true love is. I have never had that in my marriage. I truly love my son but, that is different. God has a plan for each of us. It's up to us to trust him with his plan and let it happen. Try to live your life to your utmost morales and values and then just give it to God. That's all a person can do. Divorce sucks. There is nothing good about it. But, life will get better. Hopefully it will not take each of you 5 years like it has taken me.....and I am by no means totally finished with the tears. The hurt that I went through may never be forgotten but, hopefully someday, I can brush it to the side!!!! Good luck to all of you!!!

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  Posted by Tammy L Sun Jul 12, 2009 7:05pm PDT

  I'm 3 years post-divorce, after 25 years of marriage. I too took the little baby steps, I also went to my church group,Divorce Care it helped alot. Then I went back to school and got a college degree. I graduated this last May 3 years to the day of me filing for my divorce. Starting over has been hard, but I feel I'm the person God wants me to be, strong. independant and leanning on Him for the next step in my life.

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  Posted by carmella Wed Jul 15, 2009 11:22pm PDT

  i guess i lost my mind. i retired from my employment,sold my home for what was owed and left the state. i had lived in this state all my life and if i was going to start all over again after a divorce then i was going to start my entire life all over again. i am so busy creating and learning that the pain is less and less. i gave up not only him but i put the snow,ice and the gas bills behind me and moved to a state that has nothing but the sun shine and the grace of GOD. i miss my friends but we were all talking the same conversation and i got exhausted will the same old conversation of, one day i'm gonna".

  be strong people. dream you a life that you deserve and live it and give GOD the praise that you have another day of life--not death.

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  Posted by Tsisqua- Cherokee, WhiteHawk- Algonquin Thu Jul 30, 2009 5:34pm PDT

  After being married three times and now divorced, recovery is never easy. I spent over half of my adult life married and after all was said and done the issue is how much of yourself do you have left to carry on? In a relationship people try to give, sacrifice, put their lives on the back burner, and respect each other which is not easy for two individuals to do in any situation. After the anger, hurt, pain and many other emotions we go through after divorce, it is important to remember what can you do with what is left of yourself. There is always some small flame in you heart, mind, or body that can be ignited again so you can heal and move on. It becomes a time to reflect on healing and becoming stronger, especially if you have children no matter what age they are affected too. Look in the mirror and see your true reflection and learn to love yourself again...

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  Posted by First o Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:38pm PDT

  you know i been there,never easy especially when its or other halve filing for divorce.its hard but u know it needed to happen caues the time i spent by self,sad ,depress ..and soul searhing me,its all great...because i know now its the best .i needed a partner to believe in me,accept who i am,love me as i am,and always support me,and be there for me.i grew up so much.and now we are that the final stages of divorce,and all i can say,is his "EX"will be someones else treasure!!!!!!!!yes!as much as i cried,i know its part of my sole journey i have been in,and only by the power of our creator,and only by GOD my life has been plan.GOD will remove all obstacles,including my husband in order for me to continue my spiritual journey.so now i stil love him,and i only wish the best for him.in time my husband will learn the hard way that our life was not bad at all,not perfect but not bad.he wil learn that happiness is where the heart is,and we tend to believe that its greener on the otherside...but it never is,hmmmm wonder why?we talk,i will always be cordial with him,no need to carry resentment for him or anybody else.life is to short,to precious to waste it on resentment.so im coming along just fine.in time iwill meet the personwho desevr me,and accept who i am. the sooner we know there is life the better and sooner we heal.ther is so much out there,and as scary as it might seem,its not,life is beautiful..even after divorce,so peace to each and every wounded soul,and broken heart.time heals..ALL!!!!!

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