Do you get a "boyfriend layer"?

From the Community…

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  Posted by None Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:20am PDT

  I really don't get it, wouldn't you maintain your looks more if you are with someone, and especially if they see you naked? Meh

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  Posted by Leah Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:37am PDT

  I have it! My boyfriend likes it...I just want my clothes to fit right again...ugh!!

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  Posted by Linda W Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:43am PDT

  I too have gained some weight after falling for this new guy. We always go out to eat, and once in a while we go out dancing. So, I think we should go out dancing more and eating less. Well, it's just not the case. He always likes to go to eat really hearty foods like "the cantina" a really nice Mexican restuarant with some very high fat food. It's so good, but not for the waist. So, I try to even it all out with lot's of extra curricular sex. hmmm... So neither he or I will have the layer around the waist....LW

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  Posted by Kylie Neighbors Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:45am PDT

  I totally agree with this. I've been dating a guy for the last few months and while he was staying with me for a couple of weeks (he lives a few hours away from me and has summers off) I definitely put on a few lbs. We were eating out more and I wasn't hitting the gym after work b/c I was in a hurry to get home to spend time with him. Now that he is back to school, I'm able to get back into my normal routine. I believe this "phenomenon" is totally viable. When you first start dating someone you want to spend time with that person and are more than willing to break your normal routine, whatever that may be. It takes a little time to mesh your two lives together until you can do your thing and he do his and figure the schedules out.

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  Posted by Mrs. Carol B Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:46am PDT

  Hi Joanna,

  It's called "contentment." It's what happens to a woman when she is happy in her relationship with her man. The other extremes, obesity and anorexia/bulemia happen when women are not content. Once you are aware of it you can contain it. You are wise to include your man in a trip to the gym, a hike in the woods, etc. One way to keep it under control is not to drink alcohol. Drinking packs on calories quickly including weight gain from bloat. I like your post very much. Lots of luck in the relationship. By the way, most men really like a little bit of cushioning on a woman. I have that from a reliable source.

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  Posted by omerlm Thu Aug 20, 2009 11:06am PDT

  i totally have the BF layer, for the first time in my life? he's getting it too! it sucks, but we are both super busy right now working butts off to pay bills, we don't have time to work out.

  it's not that it's acceptable to "let yourself go" but if you're already with someone, they are more accepting of your "not-so-fit" times, like now, for me.

  it still bothers me that i'm putting on a few lbs for the first time in my life, but he thinks i'm sexxxy and it makes me feel better until i can get back in the swing of working out.

  Leah, i totally agree. argh!

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  Posted by InLove Thu Aug 20, 2009 11:13am PDT

  Yes, but it's a husband layer. I put on 10 pounds after I got married in only 6 months! Since then, we got gym memberships and go together and keep each other accountable.

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  Posted by Trish Thu Aug 20, 2009 11:33am PDT

  I’m actually the opposite. I’ve noticed when I’m seeing someone I lose weight. I eat less junk food and snack less. I love to cook but hate to cook for just myself. So when I’m single I tend to eat a lot of pre packaged food instead of making a healthier, well-rounded meal. I’m also more active when I’m in a relationship. (on a side note my house is also a lot cleaner when I’m seeing someone because I know that they could decide to come over on any given night)

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  Posted by Krystina Thu Aug 20, 2009 12:12pm PDT

  Ahhhh! I have so noticed this. I seem to no longer care about how much I weight since my boyfriend and I have been together. He says he loves me regardless, and if my weight was to ever go over the edge, then he would tell me. Otherwise he tells me not to worry. I feel comforted by that, but I still feel bad for gaining 12 pounds.

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  Posted by KIm Thu Aug 20, 2009 12:18pm PDT

  Yes, I certainly got the ‘boyfriend layer’ when we first started going out. I think it attributes to you finding someone that you truly enjoy spending time with. Now, armed with your new love, the whole world is a brand new place again. Even the restaurant down the corner that you can easily pass up before, all of a sudden is a new again. We have this urge to share our lives with one another and a big part of our lives is FOOD. My then boyfriend, who is now my husband also gained a bit of weight. Call it the ‘girlfriend layer’. But, luckily, after being married now for almost 3 years, we’ve learned to enjoy each other’s time with other things. We do go to the gym together some days, and we watch what we eat. Although I’m sure my husband could care less about a not-so-tight mid section, and vice versa, I enjoy working out and staying fit—not just for him but for my health as well. Have we given up our lazy days in front of the T.V. with Ben and Jerry? Nope! But we’ve learned to cut back. But really, there is NOTHING wrong with the ‘layer’. It means we’re comfortable and happy. For those of you that think that we should constantly be working out to keep our significant others physically satisfied, that’s all good, but it’s just not as fun.

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